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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think sedating kids for a quiet life is not on?!

174 replies

glitterazi · 19/12/2016 01:08

Really don't want to link to this but going to have to for context as too hard to explain otherwise.
On what planet is it reasonable to drug your kids for a plane ride for a quiet life?
Read the blog post and then the comments.
Seems there are actually people out there that would do this, and not just the blogger. Which is kind of depressing.
I just don't get why you'd drug your kid to sleep when there was no medical reason to and you say yourself it's "because people may look at you with stares" - (look in the comments themselves for that beaut)
AIBU?)

www.jetlagandmayhem.com/destinations/planning-tips/sedating-kids-on-the-plane-with-phenergan/

OP posts:

minipie · 19/12/2016 14:30

Goodness me there are an awful lot of perfect parents on MN aren't there.

I think there are bigger things to get worked up about and we absolutely should not be comparing this to child abuse.

Spam88 · 19/12/2016 14:39

I worked in a pharmacy about 10 years ago when I was in college and most pharmacists wouldn't sell phenergan because it's abused like this.

dingdongthewitchishere · 19/12/2016 15:08

minipie

Giving children the wrong or excessive medication is not a light subject. You might as well give them a glass of brandy to make them sleepy. Yeap, child abuse.

BillSykesDog · 19/12/2016 15:19

ding, obviously the advice has changed since your children had them then. I guess that they are minimum 18 months old. My twins are 4 months old, had their immunisations this morning at 11:45 and the official advice given is Calpol just before or as soon as possible afterwards and not to bother waiting for symptoms. This is for the first and third injections with the Men B components and not the second which has no Men B. Yours didn't have this advice because they didn't have Men B. But this is the current advice. Go ahead and ring your own GP if you're that bothered about it. But it is the current advice.

ARumWithAView · 19/12/2016 15:20

Doesn't Medised have a complicated history of being misused or overused with young children?

Happy to be corrected by anyone with a pharmaceutical background, but I thought it was given a 2yrs+ classification around 2008, then that was upped to 6yrs+ in 2011, and then it was mademade totally unavailable (in the UK) in 2012?

KnitsBakesAndReads · 19/12/2016 15:25

This thread seems to be conflating very different issues. Surely we can all agree that there's a vast difference between a child with an anxiety disorder or other additional needs being given medication prescribed by a doctor, and parents using a sedative for very young children because they have chosen to travel long haul and are worried about their child's behaviour on the flight?

MarjorieSimpson · 19/12/2016 16:10

But these parents aren't using a sedative. They are using antihistamines, that most people would have no issue with, because it would help their dcs become drowsy and be more likely to sleep.
They are not sedative at all.

If one has issues with a parent giving them antihistamines during a flight, then they should have an issue when they are at home.

MarjorieSimpson · 19/12/2016 16:13

And of course the issue is that the use of said medication has been diverted, its not used for the primary intended use but for the side effects of the drug.

However, whether you use said drug because of hay fever or because you want a quiet child, the effects on the child are exactely the same. And the risks.
So why would it be OK to take those risks to calm hay fever down at home, make the child drowsy etc... but somehow it's not ok to do that once a year in a plane.
Surely the risks are much lower if you use it just once in the year on a plane than if you use it regularly at home??

KnitsBakesAndReads · 19/12/2016 16:37

Marjorie, promethazine isn't a first line treatment for hayfever so it's unlikely many parents will be using it for this purpose at home. It's actually classed as a sedating antihistamine so it's not true to say it isn't a sedative.

MyschoolMyrules · 21/12/2016 16:31

Yes ARum, Medised is not on the market anymore, you are correct as far as I know, but my kids are now 11 and 13 so it used to be recommended by pharmacists. It was also recommended by my GP, when Ds had tonsillitis (alongside antibiotics) about 10 years ago. Times do change, guidelines change as well.

If I remember well, my logic (and I admit I was probably wrong) is that it wasn't to make MY life easier but a baby who is in distress for hours is actually not good or nice, for the baby. Couldn't care less about other passengers, or about myself. I thought genuinely that my DSs would be more comfortable, sleep well and be happier during the flights (to visit their grandparents in North America, which is a 7 hour flight, plus two connecting flights so a total of 11 hours in the air plus all waiting times at three different airports. We haven't made that journey very often I can tell you).

Primaryteach87 · 21/12/2016 16:40

A friend who is a GP says she regularly prescribes for children traveling on long haul flights...so obviously she doesn't think it's dangerous.

I wouldn't and haven't but I honestly can't get that worked up about it.

KnitsBakesAndReads · 21/12/2016 20:12

it wasn't to make MY life easier but a baby who is in distress for hours is actually not good or nice, for the baby.

But isn't the solution to that to avoid putting a baby in a situation where he or she will be so distressed that a sedative is seen as necessary? I know there will always be times when it's impossible to avoid a distressing situation, however the scenario in the OP's link didn't sound like it was unavoidable.

MyschoolMyrules · 21/12/2016 20:29

It was for my parents to meet their grand children and they were both too ill and old to travel. They are dead now so we don't do the trip anymore.

KnitsBakesAndReads · 21/12/2016 21:58

I'm sorry to hear that school. Just in case my post wasn't clear, I was commenting on the blogger the OP linked to as her decision to travel sounded very much a matter of personal choice and enjoyment. I didn't mean it as a comment on anyone else's choices.

Quimby · 21/12/2016 22:36

How quiet?

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 22/12/2016 05:39

I have to agree that if I had children who couldn't cope with flights, whether through SN, other disabilities or anxiety/fear, then I'm quite sure I would give them whatever medication the GP would prescribe to help.

But since mine don't fall into those categories, then giving them drugs/meds to keep them quiet would be unreasonable of me. Actually, they both did really well although the 4yo had a few issues with refusing to suck on anything while the plane was descending - finally persuaded him to drink something so his ears wouldn't hurt, which was good.

SparklesandBangs · 22/12/2016 12:29

I think often we forget how times have changed and how knew knowledge allows us to make more informed choices.

As a child I travelled loose in my carrycot in the back of my parents mini van, this was normal and I was given Phenergan when travelling to make me drowsy and to prevent travel sickness. We didn't fly but we did go on very long car journeys.

When my DC were small we had car seats but they were forward facing by 6 months and onto boosters very young, DC1 had travel sickness and we tried Phenergan which she hated and it did make her very sleepy, so we didn't use it on the plane but did after to help her get over jet lag, this was on advice but not prescribed.

Now I wouldn't dream of travelling in a car without a car seat, rear facing for as long as possible and I disagree with the legislation that says if you have 3 DC and can't fit in 3 car seats then the biggest can just sit in the middle with a normal seatbelt. I also wouldn't go near Phenergan or even suggest it in a joking manner to a relative or friend.

I would however agree that some DC need help with anxiety either because of a diagnosed SN or just because they may be a little scared and saying that we should just put up with it is a very strange and uncaring approach. I am sure there is a point between Phenergan/anesthesia and nothing.

MontePulciana · 22/12/2016 12:37

Animals aren't allowed to fly sedated. They need their senses to cope with turbulence. We were told our cat would be denied boarding La - London in 2013 if she was sedated. Should be same rule for kids! Nothing worse than trying to evacuate zombies if there was a fire...

M0nkington · 22/12/2016 13:13

The blogger that OP has quoted lives in the same city as me and flying long and short haul is a necessity of life here. And yes you can buy most drugs without prescription here and abuse them if you want. But slagging off this lady and her choices is totally unfair. She is a great mom and a responsible parent in a society where many kids are left at home with the servants while mom and dad jet off for a luxury break. Comparing our lifestyles to living in the UK and occasionally flying long haul on holiday isn't fair. yABu.

KnitsBakesAndReads · 23/12/2016 00:11

But slagging off this lady and her choices is totally unfair. She is a great mom and a responsible parent in a society where many kids are left at home with the servants while mom and dad jet off for a luxury break.

Eh? It's okay to give your kids sedatives to keep them quiet on a flight because at least you're not leaving them with the "servants"?

I don't know where the blogger lives (it looks like the post has actually been deleted since the OP shared the link), but I don't see why living outside the UK makes any difference to whether this type of behaviour is considered acceptable or not.

M0nkington · 23/12/2016 00:42

You'd be amazed how people parent differently in other countries. (Shocker) I can guarantee that right now in the skies above the Earth are aeroplanes full of thousands of kids and adults who have taken all manner of sedatives in the rush to get home for Christmas. Americans and Australians consider it perfectly safe and normal. You can't compare and judge other people's choices without living their lives.

KnitsBakesAndReads · 23/12/2016 00:56

I'm not sure you can generalise about the beliefs held by entire nationalities in that way!

As for not judging others choices without living their lives, I agree that understanding and empathy are important. However, I find it difficult to agree with the choices made by someone who writes a blog about their holidays and travel but admits to giving drugs (as she calls them) to a child under the age of two in order to facilitate that travelling.

I personally wouldn't choose to sedate my child simply because I wanted a long haul holiday. Other people, including this blogger, make different choices. Judging from this thread, there are a range of views on this.

Andrewofgg · 23/12/2016 08:36

Taking children long haul does not need drugs, it needs keeping them interested and amused and giving up your own sleep if that's what it takes. I mean you, Madam, on the flight from Philadelphia to London earlier this year. Wake up and attent to Little Boy Seven so that the other passengers (the ones who are not his parents) can sleep!

Isitadoubleentendre · 23/12/2016 08:45

Obviously i wouldn't give my kid a sedative to get them to sleep on a plane.....but a while back i saw a video of some thundering cunt of a man who properly screamed in the face of a crying child on a plane, i guess in a bid to get them to shut up.

And you often hear of parents getting shit because their kids cry, or that couple of fekt the need to make little 'packages' for the passengers around them because they were so worried their newborn would disrupt the plane.

So I can understand why parents might feel pressured to do this.

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