Is it tight or not? Baby shower related

[oohlalala]

Mid arranging a baby shower for my bf, a suprise one. She was a bit anti the idea when we discussed a while ago, but I spoke to her DH and we both agreed that secretly we thought she would love it.

Because of the apprehension, I'm guessing shes a bit embarrassed about the whole gifting business being a true brit! So have suggested to friends that they just bring a book, new or old that they love for her, then gift once baby is born whatever they want. Is this tight? Would you be dissapointed if you had a shower with just books? I was thinking its sort of like opening your presents before Christmas if you get all your gifts pre-baby?

"Baby shower" makes me shudder.

I like the idea of a pre baby get together, and the idea of children's books is genius imo.

If people just gave baby grows & small stuff, maybe OK, but the thought of much else I would have cringed to accept.

Perhaps it's only on TV that the bigger stuff gets given?

Some people don't want to be given stuff for the baby until after it arrives-is that why some of us cringe at the idea?

I didn't have much opinion re baby showers until I saw a friends sister have one. Lots of small gifts, pink, they knew the name already, but sadly the baby died unexpectantly and was a stillbirth. Distressing apparently to deal with all the stuff.
In the course of my adult life I have known four ladies that this has happened to. Better idea for presents on the safe arrival.

Tea party - great idea.

I really wouldn’t. She doesn’t want one, they’re grabby, people are superstitious about having things before and you have to buy another gift after. Terrible custom.

A bit late to cancel it, the baby must be about 10 months old now!

I love books but don't want any recommendations from anyone. Suggest you stick with some practical use for the baby shower by letting people buy something useful for her/the baby/buy whatever they want. People have very different taste in books.

Dances it's someone who has bumped at least 3 baby shower threads (two on pregnancy board) with some links to some kind of baby shower etiquette or similar bollocks

Oh for fucks sake why resurrect this zombie?

Who gives a crap about baby shower etiquette? They are appalling anyway no amount of 'etiquette' is gonna change that.

And no amount of etiquette is going to change the fact when someone says they dont want something but you decide you are going to arrange it anyway so you can be seen to be the 'great friend doing this amazing thing' NO you aren't its not about you.