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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not go To work Friday?

67 replies

7moresleeps · 18/12/2016 17:32

I have name changed due to this subject but I really don't care if the people involved find out I have posted this.. I have just had enough and want to curl up into a ball and cry!

I have just completed my childcare apprenticeship in my area, The children have been lovely and the staff have been Horrible, Horrible since the day I started. :(

. The boss always refused to me as " Just the apprentice" and when it came to putting staff pictures on the website she said to everyone that she put everyone's photos online apart from mine because I was " just the apprentice" I wasn't upset because she didn't put my photo online I was upset the way she refused to me as " just the apprentice". She said this in front of everyone.

. I have worked 8 - 6 most days and I was only contracted to work 8.15 a 5.30. When I had a meeting I mentioned this to the boss and she replied " your the apprentice, you need to be flexible in your hours" ( I never got paid for the over time and when I did stay on there was only 2 / 3 children left and 2 other members of staff) when I again mentioned this she got rather nasty.

. Some of the staff call me Cinderella and encourage the children to do the same This is because when they go for walks , play outside I have to stay behind and clean ( Hoover , Mop, put toys away etc) the preschool, Nursery and Baby room ( and bathrooms) and then sort the children's teas out all by myself And if I don't get everything done in time the dept manager gets nasty and makes horrible comments and then ignores me. The children's parents have said they thought I was the cleaner!

. I have never had the opportunity to sit down and join in with games with the children or babies.. The staff always give me lists of what I need to do that day ( clean all the toys in every room, sort the sleep room, be in change of the dishwasher and washing, file the children's artwork away) the staff just sit and watch / engage with the children.. Because of this I have never had the opportunity to build a bond with any of the babies or children.

. The boss has said if OFSTED turn up for an inspection I must go home " sick" as she doesn't want me around that day.

. The boss told me she wouldn't be keeping me on after Christmas because I have got my apprenticeship and it would cost her too much.. She told me that I would be loosing my job in the middle of the PARK with Parents and strangers around. That was the first and only time I have been out for a walk with the children.

. I have been having issues with my health condition recently and because of it I have been finding myself the sudden need to be sat on the floor because I am in so much pain, when this happens the staff tell me to get up and get on with it. The doctors and my specialist have said I am getting more " episodes" of this pain due to stress. They also moaned to my tutor because I have taken " too long" to complete tasks - They gave me 45 mins to do my " Cinderella duties" and do tea for 40 children, my health condition makes me take longer do to things, they know this.

. I have once very calming mentioned to the dept manager that I wasn't happy with her calling me Cinderella and the way she has been treating me and she said that she wasn't happy the way I had spoken to her, so I got called into the office.. I have only stayed at that place this long because I didn't want to make then think they had " won" and I needed to get my apprenticeship.

. I really don't want to go back to that place, I feel like I can't take this bullying anymore and because of it I am dreading Christmas. On Friday they have planned for me to sort the storage cupboard and clean and iron everything ready for the new year .. They will be having a specials Christmas breakfast party with the children when I do this.

On Friday they are only due to have more staff than children on Friday and I am at breaking point.

AIBU?
I mentioned all of my concerns before and suggested a rota for cleaning and meal times and they said they don't need one because I am the apprentice and I should do it.

OP posts:

NapQueen · 18/12/2016 17:36

Has your Apprenship finished or signed off? When is it due to end?

AndShesGone · 18/12/2016 17:37

A few things you say are dreadful but I want to just clarify about your duties. We're you supposed to be with the children and gain child care skills? Or were your duties up to the nursery - as you doing all the cleaning and making the tea seems normal for the most junior member of staff.

Parmaviolets13 · 18/12/2016 17:40

I'm so sorry, that sounds dreadful. If you are finished and signed off, and obviously she isn't keeping you on - don't go in.
If you haven't been signed off and completely finished id say unfortunately you'd have to go in, otherwise there may be trouble with your manager.

Keep your head held high and look for other jobs, you can do it.

for you xxx

Original poster

7moresleeps · 18/12/2016 17:42

I was meant to be doing everything all the staff have Been doing, including interacting with the children... I only did this when I my tutor came to observe me.

I have passed my apprenship, so if I don't turn up it won't effect me that way.. Would just mean I won't get paid. she wants me to stay on until Friday when they close which is 2pm.

OP posts:

Jaynesworld · 18/12/2016 17:43

You've completed your apprenticeship, if not going in on Friday won't affect it fuck em and don't go in

Original poster

7moresleeps · 18/12/2016 17:43

I also forgot to mention there is light at the end of this very dark tunnel.... I have been offered a job where I did my work experience and the staff are lovely! Just dreading this week

OP posts:

ilovesooty · 18/12/2016 17:43

What formal processes have you gone through to address the situation?

strayduck · 18/12/2016 17:44

Where are you op? Not in South Glos I hope. If I found out that's they way they treated staff , apprentice or not, my DD would be out of there ASAP. It is not acceptable to treat people like that. If it won't affect your apprenticeship or you would need a reference I wouldn't go in.

Original poster

7moresleeps · 18/12/2016 17:45

I had a meeting with my boss and dept manager and discussed everything but they basically just laughed in my face and remained me I was " just the apprentice"

I even tried looking for other nurseries to complete my apprenticeship but no where was looking for one so I had to stay on

OP posts:

ilovesooty · 18/12/2016 17:47

What did your tutor have to say about it?

RebelSoldier · 18/12/2016 17:47

Go in Friday.
Put in a thorough and detailed complaint to the relevant authorities.
Horrid behaviour.

DonaldStott · 18/12/2016 17:48

Fuck it off. Well done for sticking it out and getting your qualification. Cinderella!! Cheeky twats.

NapQueen · 18/12/2016 17:49

Honestly if the whole apprentiship is a done deal I'd email her and say that you will not be returning to the role.

PenguinsandPebbles · 18/12/2016 17:50

I'm very anti taking sick days, but this sounds awful, no actually it sounds utterly vile and a disgraceful way to treat someone.

I think you sound like you have a nasty virus coming on.

Good luck in your new appointment!

Original poster

7moresleeps · 18/12/2016 17:52

She spoke to them and said the boss had said that I was just slow and that's why they were getting stressed and that we all take it in turns to do jobs around the nursery ... Which isn't true. And that because the tutor had seen me interact with the children during observations and the staff acting nice she thought I was just being sensitive.

The staff were only ' nice' when the tutor visited the nursery.

OP posts:

greenfolder · 18/12/2016 17:52

I genuinely would just not go back if your apprenticeship is signed off and you have a job to go to.

PamBagnallsGotACollage · 18/12/2016 17:53

Forget Friday. hku should go in Monday and Tuesday and take the final three days off with stress and your medical condition as the legitimate reasons. Take all week if you can get a doc appointment on Monday and get signed off. Sounds awful.

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 18/12/2016 17:53

Do make sure you tell your tutor what you've told us - maybe you'll be able to save some other unfortunate student from going through this awful situation. Congratulations on your new job! If your apprenticeship is complete and your new job assured, I would stay away and recoverfrom the pain and stress they have inflicted. Would your Dr sign you off (going by what they've said?)

OrangeSquashTallGlass · 18/12/2016 17:53

Soon you'll be at your new job (when do you start?) and you'll be able to put this behind you.

But you have two positive things gained from this experience:

Your qualification
The memory of how they treated you so that you will never ever treat anyone in the same way.

You're a better person for this. They can't take that away from you.

DingyDillDong · 18/12/2016 17:55

You need to email your tutor and if you have a placement officer at college/with your training provider copy them in to it. Tell them everything that has happened and how it has affected your training in that you've not had time with children or experience doing files, observations etc. You should have raised this earlier but I understand you may have been worried about implications of going in and seeing them. I would also ask to see their policies and get a copy of their grievances policy. If there is somebody higher than the manager like an owner or area manager I would report their behaviour as bullying and make a formal complaint.

winterinmadeira · 18/12/2016 17:57

If you've been signed off your apprenticeship and there will be no comeback on you I wouldn't go in for the rest of the week never mind Friday!

Monr0e · 18/12/2016 17:57

Who did you do your apprenticeship with? Private training company? College? Have you reported everything to your tutor?
You should have a learning agreement in place which your employer should have signed and which they are probably in breach of.

If you are absolutely certain you have completed everything and your employer does not have to sign off any paperwork and you are not relying on them for a reference then I would absolutely not go in but put everything in writing and give this to your tutor. Previous training providers I have worked for would blacklist companies like this and refuse to put any more apprentices in there.

Well done on completing yours and your new job.

TheCatsMother99 · 18/12/2016 17:59

I agree with Dingy , let tor tutor or whoever know so that they hopefully don't let anyone else do their placements there.

ilovesooty · 18/12/2016 18:02

I agree with Dingy and Monr0e

You need to get your complaint on record.

And please join a union in case you encounter work difficulties again.

Original poster

7moresleeps · 18/12/2016 18:05

I have already mentioned all of this to the tutor but she just thinks I am being sensitive as the boss and dept manger had her in the office talking to her for ages! The boss and dept manager can be very manipulative

OP posts:

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