to feel a bit shit that they're making me fly alone?

[SF25]

My mum, dad, sister, brother, niece and I are all going to New York for Christmas (can't wait, have never been before!) I admit that they are in much better jobs than me and do have more money. They're all deciding to fly First, I admit, I'm extremely jealous. There is no way in hell could I afford to pay the extra few thousand pounds!! I have tried asking my mum if they could maybe fly with me and they say that I should have saved throughout the year (mainly my brother and sister) but I just don't have enough to save!! Especially just so I can fly first (as lovely as it looks). It means I do the whole airport faff on my own, as they go to a separate bit. It's not that I can't fly alone, but it feels a bit shit. Especially as DC are with their dad this Christmas. BTW, we were all flying economy (which is when they gave me a price and I said I'd love to come) then they upgraded.

Feel a bit crap tbh.

[capricorn12]

I agree that this is super shitty of your family and in your shoes, I would be having doubts about going as I think the financial gulf will cause problems whilst you're there too. I hate to say it , but as you mention that your DC are with their dad this Christmas, do you think that they possibly only invited you because otherwise you would have been alone for Christmas and they didn't actually think you would accept?
I hope that I'm wrong and there is a surprise upgrade in the offing but if not , prepare to feel a bit Cinderella.

[SloeGinandTonic]

They'll all go and sit in the lounge for two hours on each side, and leave you in that long security line and stuck at the gate? They still have to wait for you to disembark, they know that right? And you have to do the crappily slow immigration queue?

fast track often isn't shorter if it is T5.
You don't get any fast track immigration when entering the USA
if there are the new self immigration kiosks then having entered the USA on the esta before is what gets you through faster

[Fiddlefaddle2303]

Wow, what an absolutely nasty thing to do!
I can only think / hope they have secretly upgraded you, If not, well you live and learn, I wouldn't put yourself out again for them! X

[Lynnm63]

I'd be really pissed off if family did this to me. I'd go this time but it would be the last time I'd book anything with them,

[HaveNoSocks]

Surely they're upgrading you as a surprise? I can't imagine leaving one person out. If they can afford to upgrade themselves they can afford a fraction more to upgrade you too.

[Bedsheets4knickers]

I think it's abit off of them .. I'd feel hurt too .. I'd get a couple of good books to take and just get through it . I'd like to see their faces at the other end . I'd feel so embarrassed. X

[MeetMeAtMidnight]

You have saved. You've saved for the flight and holiday you can afford. No problem at all with some members of a group, hen party or two families, upgrading if they can afford it but to arrange to all fly economy and then move the goalposts and upgrade leaving one family member to travel alone is pretty mean.

OP, just console yourself with the thousands you've saved, 1st class to NYC is IMO a needless expense, the flight isn't that long and even in economy BA and Virgin transatlantic planes aren't horrible. You won't care once you get to NYC, it's bloody amazing.

[WhiskyAndTwiglets]

The staff will all secretly laugh at them and respect you if they realise when you are on the flight.

For very little in comparison, you can buy a lounge pass scheme and get a lovely lounge with free alcohol at the airports. You can also buy a great pair of noise cancelling headphones and a cashmere blanket and cuddle up and watch movies the whole flight.

Cost to you = a treat but much much much cheaper than the silly money of first class.

Look into paying for fast track security as well.

[bumsexatthebingo]

I think that's really nasty. If you can't all afford to upgrade then you don't just leave 1 person out - different if it's a couple. I honestly wouldn't want to go. If it's too late to get a decent amount of money back then just do your own thing while you're there. No doubt they will be eating in exclusive places while you're expected to dine alone anyway.

[FlissMumsnet]

We advise all users to be aware that not everyone on the internet is who they say they are, and that, although we're often amazed by the incredible support our members give each other, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

[dingdongthewitchishere]

It's a short flight, so unless you have an unlimited budget, I really wouldn't recommend paying the 1st class fee. Frankly, even if you could, it would be a waste to save all year for that! Business maybe, it's more comfortable, but you are not missing anything by not going 1st.

As someone above said, I would checked very carefully what their plans are for NY, hotels/ restaurants etc. It can be a very expensive city, are you sure you are on the same budget once you are there?

[Puzzledandpissedoff]

they think you should save like £10000 and have that in the bank for the holiday, so that's why they just upgraded

Their decision I suppose - though it's not the way I'd treat a family member myself - but I'm another who's wondering how this will work when you're there

NY is fantastic, but while you can economise there if you really try, it's not exactly a bargain destination. So isn't it going to be a bit awkward if they're constantly flashing the kind of cash you wouldn't want to spend yourself?

[LightastheBreeze]

Your parents sound horrible if they are doing this, I can understand it a bit with your siblings because they can sometimes be a bit like this, my DB and partner maybe would, but for your parents to leave you out is downright mean.

[SF25]

Gosh I hope Mumsnet hasn't put that because they think I'm trying to get money off people! (I'm obviously not )

[LobsterQuadrille]

Are you flying with a small baby and therefore they are less willing to upgrade you? Massive apologies if there are two SFs!

[stiffstink]

You're getting nowt off me OP 😉😁

[Ineedmorelemonpledge]

You don't get any fast track immigration when entering the USA

This is the point I'm making sloe.

The only advantage to me flying business this Feb (apart from sleeping) was I got off the plane super quick so was one of the first in the queue to clear.

Although when I landed (in Atlanta) I still had to queue for a machine to take a photo and print out a receipt even though I had my ESTA with me so the process was hideously long, but again I was in front of the majority of travellers in my plane at least.

OP might have to sit at the back or middle of the plane, wait for a few hundred people to disembark, hit the back of the queues and wait.

And all her family can do is sit and wait for her to come out the other side. I doubt they've thought on that though. Hope they aren't super mardy about it op, as it's not your fault.

When I tried to bring someone non first through the fast track security in JFK on the way back from that trip in Feb they wouldn't allow it, they had to join the normal queue. The waiting time was hugely different.

I just think it's a pretty shit thing to do.

Sorry op.

[SF25]

Nope, all children are with their dad (including baby)

[MsVestibule]

That's what it looked like to me, SF25 - you've hardly been passing the begging cap around, though!! And however generous some MNers are not me I can't imagine people clubbing together to send anybody First Class to NY .

[Ineedmorelemonpledge]

Maybe Mr Branson's reading it.


And will give you a free flight on Virgin to pee off BA and get huge brownie points.

[SF25]

yeah, thought I'd try my luck and see if a stranger would send me a few grand

[Chocness]

I think they're mean. Fair enough if there was more than one of you in cattleclass but there isn't. Can your folks not pay the difference for you which you take as a loan as it was unexpected?

[Ineedmorelemonpledge]

Don't tell me you're in the Days Inn, Brownsville and they are a "short hop" away in the Plaza op?

Or are you all in the same hotel at least?

[LightastheBreeze]

It all sounds quite spiteful like they are enjoying it.

[SF25]

We're in the same hotel