To be really cross about the situation my husband tried to put me in and to have said no

[PinotAndPlaydough]

I will try and keep this short, I don't think I ABU but husband doea.

I work as a nanny looking after two children and have my two children with me at the same time, today their mum asked me to have them at my house and she would collect between 5.30-45, my husband knows all of these details.

At 5.35ish I get a text from husband saying MIL is visiting 90 year old relative at care home and want to know can I FaceTime them so they can speak to my children. I said no, I'm working and the mum is literally going to collect any minute (even if she was due to collect I would have said no but it was just the worst timing ever).

The lady I nanny for is lovely and wouldn't have minded if my children were on the phone and husband knows this, however I just don't think it's professional as my children would have needed help from me. I them revived streams of texts from husband saying it'll only be two minutes, old relative will be upset etc etc etc.
He has history for not standing up to/wanting to upset MIL and relations are very strained between us all.
I am so cross that he thought it would be OK (and told MIL it would be fine and to expect a call) because he can't say no to her.

He on the other hand think it was two minutes out of my day and would have been a nice thing to do for someone who doesn't have the chance to see the children very often. Was I being a cow to say no?

Just ask him to drive home, collect his kids, drive back to his work and Skype his relative with his kids from his, work.

Sorted.

Yanbu. If the mum was due to arrive then you would need to be handing over and telling her about the day/any info she needed to know etc. I'm sure she wouldn't have been impressed at having to hang around while you were fannying about on Skype however nice she is. Earlier in the day I would see no issue with a short call.

^Well....it would have only been 2 minutes out of mil life to give you notice about the visit so you could arrange to accommodate the request hmm
THAT would have been a 'nice' thing to do for someone you asking a favour from!^

This * 1000

I would have made the phonecall - 90yr old relative probably would have been delighted to see 4 children not two, all 4 children could be involved, and a learning opportunity about the wonders of technology could have been had.

The children I mind speak to my family members when they facetime, they all know each other even though they haven't met, they love talking to my sister in USA and the children she minds, sometimes we leave ft open and they join in our activities. My mindees have even put on a show and FaceTimed it to my mum. They all call my elderly MIL "grandma nokids"

Sometimes it's nice to see the wider picture but certainly not worth falling out over

Yanbu

It's up to you to decide what you can and cannot accommodate at short notice whilst at work.

Next time he should come home to facilitate the FaceTime with the kids while you mind your charges.

You're right that it's unprofessional at pick up time. Presumably the mum would want to chat to you about the kids and arrangements for tomorrow/next week etc. I know I did when picking up from our CM.

Thing is also that yes, it would only have been 15 2 minutes out of the OP's day - and at most other times, she would have been able to do it, would have included all the kids, and everyone would have been happy.

But they asked her for those few minutes at one of the very few times in the day when the OP didn't have any minutes available. If they had asked half an hour earlier or later or an hour or two or four earlier - no problem. But they didn't. They wanted the one point of the day that she wasn't able to help.

If they had been that bothered by it, MIL could have called up earlier in the day to arrange a time or at least to find out what time OP couldn't do. But no, she couldn't be bothered to so that or to give that little courtesy to OP - she was just expecting her to jump when she clicked her fingers.