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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To as long whose side you'd have been on on this train?

96 replies

WanderingNotLost · 13/12/2016 13:41

Apologies in advance, it's a Daily Mail story

Personally I think it's bad form to not move your bags if people need seats but to be fair, if it had been me on the receiving end of the "I'm carrying a baby, you have to respect me" line it would have got my back up!

OP posts:

MuseumOfCurry · 14/12/2016 10:39

There is no reason why she could not have asked people in ordinary class to give her a seat.

Yes. I wonder why she didn't?

QueenLizIII · 14/12/2016 10:41

She says I dont give a shit or fuck (it is bleeped on the video) Im carrying a baby you have to respect me.....

Nice woman.

DontTouchTheMoustache · 14/12/2016 10:43

So you think it's better that a person in ordinary class, an actual person, be asked to move rather than this woman moving her bag? You actually think that?
And so far nobody has provided the link stating that it wasn't declassified so we don't actually know on that one.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 14/12/2016 10:43

How does speaking good Wnglish make it less likely to be a translation issue. IME it makes it more likely. Either that or you are more likely to make allowances for people with less fluent Engkish skills.

QueenLizIII · 14/12/2016 10:45

Watch the video she was rude obnoxious agressive and foul mouthed

She could sit on the floor for all i cared if she behaved like that.

DontTouchTheMoustache · 14/12/2016 10:46

queenliz you don't see the start of the video though, it looks like the lady with the baby asked the woman to move her bags nicely she says in the video "I even asked if you would like me to put it up for you". She is obviously reacting to the older woman being horrible to her she didn't go into the conversation with swearing and being upset. I would probably be swearing as well if someone thought their bag was more important than my child's safety.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 14/12/2016 10:47

I have watched the video. It's what changed my mind about it potentially being a language issue. Initially I said I thought she was rude.

DontTouchTheMoustache · 14/12/2016 10:48

With the language thing she was obviously flustered by the situation, I'm sure if English is your second language it is an easy slip up when in a confrontational situation.

AllOfTheCoffee · 14/12/2016 10:54

Did the bag pay for it's first class seat?

I've reserved two seats in the past, back when I was grumpy, richer and commuting home from long, long night shifts.

I'd have still given up my seat to a woman carrying a baby.

MuseumOfCurry · 14/12/2016 11:07

If the train was declassified then surely this is much ado about nothing.

If the train in fact was running a first-class service, then whether you think it's right for a woman's bag to be sitting on a seat instead of a person is entirely beside the point.

The first class car, where the bag was sitting on a seat, is for first class ticketed customers.

If this guideline is not enforced, then the train service is effectively defrauding its first class customers.

DontTouchTheMoustache · 14/12/2016 11:12

And as has been pointed out that would be dealt with by a ticket conductor but as it stands we don't know if it was declassified or not but what we do know is that the woman with the bags had no right to tell anyone where they could or could not sit.

whatsthecomingoverthehill · 14/12/2016 11:12

It is down to the conductor to advise whether the person has the correct ticket for where they are sitting.

Bundao · 14/12/2016 11:22

I hate the type of selfish and miserable attitude that this old lady displays. If she treats the rest of the world like that it's no wonder she's miserable.

It's a train seat. Get over it and treat others the way you wish to be treated. The world would be a much nicer place if people were not so selfish and spiteful.

toomuchtooold · 14/12/2016 12:07

I'm sure if English is your second language it is an easy slip up when in a confrontational situation.

This. I live in Germany and while my German's fairly decent with friends and sympathetic people, it goes totally out the window when someone's being confrontational

Itwasthenandstillis · 14/12/2016 12:25

The older woman is disgusting, very mean, with a lack of empathy and displayed with her behaviour a lot of what is wrong with our world at the moment.

How dare she think she is better than someone else. Waht the hell does that mean anyway? that she is richer (or thinks she is)?

She paid for ONE seat for her bottom not her bag. She assumed that the woman with the baby hadn't paid for a first class seat (before the young woman had admitted it).

If the woman with the baby sat down on a seat she hadn't paid for that was nothing to do with the older woman, not her responsibility to 'police' the seats.

Agree with Toomuchtooold - she misused the word 'respect' as a second language speaker might do. Perhaps the meaning translates into a different meaning or more than one meaning in her mother tongue.

Ahickiefromkinickie · 14/12/2016 12:39

She marched into first class knowing it wasnt declassified and wanted it her own way right now.

QueenLizIII Why do you think this? It seems clear to me the woman with baby and other passengers know the train is declassified because both refer to it.

What I want to know is why the older woman assumed mum didn't have an FC ticket.

I studied and French and Spanish and know that the languages are more formal than English so it's likely the woman with baby didn't mean she deserves respect because she has a baby, but that consideration should be given to her baby.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 14/12/2016 13:23

She may not have assumed. It looks like the video starts part way through the confrontation so it's difficult to know what came before.

littleprincesssara · 14/12/2016 13:55

The woman with the baby was 100000% in the right, I can't believe there's even a debate over it.

Forcing a woman with a baby to stand because you insist on having an empty seat next to you is despicable. If I'd been the woman I'd have thrown her bag out the window!

If every single seat is full you don't put your bag on a seat. Period.

MommaGee · 14/12/2016 15:10

Your "betters"??? Wtaf.

So because she can afford a 1St class ticket she's a better person??

whatsthecomingoverthehill · 14/12/2016 17:00

Why would whether she had a 1st class ticket even have come up? Even to ask that question before moving the bag shows what sort of person she is.

DailyMaui · 14/12/2016 17:37

On that line the first class seats are declassified pretty often as the service is so often overcrowded/late/generally fecking awful. There will be an intermittent announcement from the driver. They usually don't say it at every station, mostly just at the start of the journey. (And you can hear someone saying this on this tape... so yes, it was declassified) And if it was a new Govia train then the first class seats are the same as the normal ones, they're often not in a separate closed carriage and they just have an added bit of fabric velcroed on that says first class! And that looks like one of those trains.
The man and the woman saying this is for "first class people only" says it all really. As if they were special people.

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