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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Should I complain to neighbours

60 replies

Carol2013 · 08/12/2016 13:14

I moved into a new build 4 months ago and have NEVER even seen my next door neighbours, let alone spoken to them. The houses are designed with living at the back so we're never really at the front of the house to see them coming or going. My partner has spoken to the husband though who seemed nice and they have 2 little girls.
Anyway, everything was lovely and quiet for the first few weeks but, we notice they must have bought a TV for their bedroom and they have it up REALLY loud. Last night was particularly bad and kept us awake. I could even hear it downstairs when I was watching TV. They did turn it off just after 10pm so wasn't on late.
So, my question is - is it worth complaining? (in a nice way of course). I'd like to try to nip it in the bud early and I'm sure they don't realise how loud it is. I just feel really awkward with confrontation and especially as I've never even spoken to them before.
I did think about putting a note through the door along the lines of "hi neighbour, sorry to post a note but as we've not met yet I felt a bit uncomfortable knocking......". Obviously I would be clear that I'm sure they can hear us too etc etc.
I'm sure people have way worse neighbours than this (we have had horrendous ones in the past) but its something that is affecting our sleep so feel it could become stressful if just left .
What does everyone think?

OP posts:

AmserGwin · 20/01/2017 19:07

Try banging the wall until they turn it down? That's what I would do next, you have already asked them

Original poster

Carol2013 · 20/01/2017 22:38

Yes wall banging will be the next step!

OP posts:

Thingvellir · 21/01/2017 09:29

I hope the issue turns out to be something the builders can fix too OP. It was the fact you said you could hear the remote dropping on the floor that struck me more than the TV noise.

Hutch2017 · 14/02/2017 12:29

So, an update. After the last incident I put a polite note through the door this time. It was a very nicely worded one and for those who think its passive/aggressive - I'm not sure why I should care that I upset them as they clearly don't care about upsetting us.

The last 2 nights, the TV has been louder than ever and I'm getting stressed about it now. We also have to endure up to 2 hours every night of their kids running and thumping around upstairs on wood floors.

I've decided to speak to environmental health about what I can do about this. I'm not approaching them again as I can clearly see now they don't care.

Can anyone advise if I get EH involved, would I have to declare this eventually when selling the house? That would concern me.

Just not sure what else to do now.

Hutch2017 · 14/02/2017 12:30

should have added, after posting the note things quietened down and no problems (other than the kids running around) but its started again this week.

Wishfulmakeupping · 14/02/2017 12:41

If you're not thinking about moving then I would involve environmental health at this point. We had a similar issue with a noisy neighbour at the time we knew we'd be moving within the next year so we didn't Pursue it as we didn't want to be in dispute which would have had to have been declared at point of sale.

user892 · 14/02/2017 12:47

Yes - anything that can affect enjoyment of the property e.g neighbour disputes must be declared otherwise your buyers can pursue you.. I'd move unless you see it as your forever home.

Funnyface1 · 14/02/2017 13:04

I know you don't want to start a war but I really think you need to play them at there own game. If you can disturb them more than they disturb you then they will knock it off. I've done it and it's worked for me. I complained to my neighbour and she couldn't have cared less, was really rude, carried on the noise. I stuck it a while longer and then decided to get noisier because it was happening either way and I didn't feel it could get any worse and I was sick of being sat as quiet as a bloody mouse. If they were loud at an unreasonable time I started my noise just as they were ready to settle down. They got the message fast and after a year we are now on "hello" terms again.

Maybe it was petty of me? But I can't stand inconsiderate people and I hated that they could disturb us as much as they wanted but feel confident that they would have a quiet night of sleep when they were ready. It's just not fair. Good luck.

BadlyStuffedFoxes123 · 14/02/2017 13:47

I hear you OP we are in the same situation with our neighbours. We recently spoke to our solicitor for advice and he said that only situations such as boundary disputes need to be declared when selling. We're not 100% on this however as surely it depends on what the purchaser asks when buying the house. Best advice I can give is to put a tv in your room and bloody do it back in the mornings when they want a lie in!! This is the new strategy im trying and it seems to be working remarkably well. Good luck. You are not the only ones going through this.

Hutch2017 · 14/02/2017 14:41

Thanks for the replies. I did turn my TV up really loud last night but not even sure they blo*dy notice. I had to go to bed and theirs was STILL loud.

I thought about blasting mine loud in the mornings as that is the only time they are quiet. Not sure I have the energy for all this.

I've tried jumping up and down repeatedly upstairs when their kids are charging around but don't think they will hear me over the noise of their own kids.

I'm waiting on a call from EH so will take some advise from them.

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