To make my DH write all the Xmas cards this year *lighthearted*

[LifeLong13]

Every year for 8 years I have brought, wrapped and prettified all xmas presents.

I have also written all xmas cards (80-100 cards per year) for 8 years.

Would it be amazingly unreasonable of me to make him write them all this year and the bloody envelopes MWAH HA HA HA HA!

His handwriting is outrageously poor and I doubt the poor postman would be able to read them and therefore deliver them, also if they did get anywhere/the right place I doubt anyone would know who they were from

It's not lighthearted though is it, it is an example of sexism that many many of us put up with. Myself included sadly.

I would be tempted to ask him when he was going to buy the cards he wanted to send this year...

I send 2 cards. One each to my aunts and uncles. OH writes cards for his side. We send 3 cards in total...

Mistress it is lighthearted as he does 90% of cleaning, cooking, ironing and other traditionally female jobs around the house. I do all the DIY and have taught him how to use a drill! We're not constrained to stereotyping in this house.

He has brought them & hasn't said I'm doing them.

We send 5 cards between us. Both sets of parents, a sibling and family on both sides and the totally lovely elderly lady who lives across the road. I make a Christmas cake for work in lieu of writing cards, I always have done...

Just don't bother at all this year. I bet you only a fraction of people would notice.

We both have huge families. 4 siblings on my side, 5 on his, most of them have children, numerous aunts and uncles, friends, work people, lots and lots of family friends who always send cards and presents to DD so we always send them a card and biscuits.

I don't send any cards.

I might get one for my parents, but that'll be eat.

Bewty my DM would be horrified It took me 2 weeks to send thank you's for DDs birthday and she felt that it wasn't done in a timely fashion.

It's not lighthearted though is it, it is an example of sexism that many many of us put up with. Myself included sadly.

...Really?

It's sexist her husband has crap handwriting? nothing about her being forced. I didn't know people considered wrapping and card writing especially as something women were forced or expected to do. I think youre reaching to be offended here

You would think that as an adult he would be more than capable of going out and purchasing things for his family. Wrap those items. And organise the delivery of them and cards.
If his handwriting is that shit for the postman he could always print labels.

But I never write cards from my dc's either. They want to send them they can scribble something out

Why not? It takes all the stress out of it. My husband is in charge of Christmas and thank you cards.

Louis that was my initial thoughts but I wasn't going to overly rise to it. The only thing he doesn't do is breastfeed our daughter. Mainly because he doesn't lactate. But I'm sure someone will come along and right me and our sexist ways

Bloodyteenagers he's more than capable! It's just one of those jobs that I picked up. Like he has jobs that he does, not because I can't or won't.

Good opportunity to give up sending them. I don't know anyone, apart from a few elderly neighbours, that still does them.

Sounds like you need to send one card to your dm in that case... That's your job, she's your mother...

Aye Llama, his handwriting is too poor to read, and on another thread there's a dh who's cooking is so poor he'd poison the kids, and another man who dresses the kids in odd socks if he's made to get them ready, and another who shrinks the clothes if he's made to do laundry. Nothing to do with sexism at all.

OP I posted in support of you but never mind.

80-100 cards?!

My main question would be why send so many cards?

We could send that many if we also sent to all of the wider family (aunts, uncles and cousins) who we almost never see and wouldn't recognise if we walked past them in the street.

I stopped doing that last year and it was very liberating. Also saved an absolute fortune on postage.

This year DH has said he wants to send cards to everyone. I have told him he is welcome to do it (he will never get around to it).

Your arrangement isn't sexist FFS, though I did wonder how many posts in we would be before someone came out with that!! I just picked up the job too, but no longer do it.

I stopped sending cards years ago. My side don't really do it anyway - maybe if you see them but def not posted, we live 40 mins away but always see each other in the run up to Xmas.

Hubbys side love sending cards - his family his responsibility. I did the first yr or 2 and then thought fuck this! No one gets a card from him now. We get cards from his aunts and uncles and always ring to say thanks for thinking of us. My mil thinks I am lazy and its my job! She sends approx 100 to everyone Inc the neighbour she hasn't seen in 20 yrs and the couple they met in Spain in the early 90s.

However my hubby who is a partner in every sense does wrap all the presents otherwise they look like a toddler has been let loose with cellotape and paper.

I send about thirty five. I crack through them in a couple of hours. My DH is a very thoughtful person and would manage about two an hour because he would write an essay in each and deliberate over which card to send.

Did he send cards himself before you were married?

Did he do presents? Was he shit at them and you took over?

Would you 'trust' him with these jobs?

(Voice of experience )

Except Mistress

OP made an offhand comment about his handwriting he didn't use it as an excuse not to.

I haven't read these threads but there are men and women who are bad cooks, but again this seems like an off hand comment probably made by his DW not meant literally. For example my DSis can't cook her DH does all the cooking. I'm led to believe by friends who are chefs, that most chefs are men and people seem to enjoy eating out not too worried about erupting like a volcano on the way home. So it's not a representative view that because one poster says that about her DH it's the same for all men even if you were to take it literally.

Personally I'm not too fussy about socks, many aren't, are we talking about just round the house, going outside, a bright yellow and yellow pairing or both black but different minuscule logos on the top? Makes a difference IMO.

Laundry mishaps happen to most people, I don't see your point.

Fact is MN is a woman dominated site who come here to complain about their situation and their SO that is mostly men just because you read something on MN and a few people have a shared experience doesn't make it the norm in every household, on another site there will be men having the same grievances about their DW's. poor example and justification that something is sexist IMO

I have a rule that DH has to write the cards for anyone who sends one to us addressed to 'Mr and Mrs Dh's name'. If they don't know me well enough to know my name, I don't need to write them a card.

That said DH usually does about half the cards anyway. It would be weird if I did the cards for his family/uni mates/work friends etc.