AIBU to want is to sleep (permanently) in the living room?

[Libby34]

Have posted elsewhere but posting here for traffic less of a AIBU, more of a WWYD!!
So DP and I live in a 1 bed flat - we love it, rent is a good price and it's a good location for us both to get to work. We would like a 2 bed in a year or two but the difference in rent between a 1 & 2 bed is huge plus we'd struggle saving for a deposit, agency fees etc. DP has a daughter who's almost 4. Currently, our bedroom has the built in wardrobes, a chest of drawers, a double bed for us and a toddler bed for DSD. That's it. It's so cramped, DSD has to climb over our bed to get to hers. It's driving me mad it's so cluttered!! The obvious solution would be me and DP getting a sofa bed and sleeping in the lounge right? Wrong. We can't have a sofa!! We've had three delivered that had to be taken back because the delivery men couldn't get them in our tiny doorway. We ended up getting a wooden futon because it was flat packed so we knew we could get it in the door. We could sleep on this but it's soooo uncomfortable and such hard work pulling it out and putting it back up etc. AIBU to just get rid of the futon and buy a day bed with a trundle? Has anyone else used one as a sofa as well as a bed? Or a clic clac sofa bed? Are they ok for everyday use? Anyone else have any ideas? If we could get us in the lounge it would mean little one could actually play in the bedroom, have a reading corner, anything! Sighhhh 

Just noticed she is only with you at weekends, I would just put dd in your bed at weekends and you sleep on the sofa bed then.

We used to do that when we first moved in but I think it'd be a bit mean to get rid of her bed now she has one

I don't think it's mean , it seems strange to leave a bedroom unused all week while you sleep on a sofa bed.
Have you thought of buying her lovely children's bedding for your bed and plenty of her soft toys do it feels like hers. If you did that and an otterman to swap her toys with your belongings depending who is using the room, then it could be dual purpose.

Any reason she can't sleep in the living room?

I think it's a great idea, but I do think a futon and topper is more comfy than most sofa beds as a long term solution for 2 adults. It seems hard at first but it gets very comfy quite quickly, and won't go all saggy like some sofabeds will.

The daybed with trundle is a practical alternative but it will look too much like a bed for my taste. Seems a lot of compromise when DD is only there 1 or 2 nights a week.

Have you considered swapping her bed for a GOOD quality fold up bed?

Either one that can go under your bed or one that folds up into something that looks like a piece of furniture (they look sort IF like a radiator cover and the top is like a shelf)

I know you want more space for her toys too (and I think you want to give her a room if her own, which is lovely, but IMO a waste of space in a small flat, for ANY 4 yo, but especially one who isn't there 7/7).

You can get some great storage for her toys that won't look out of place in the lounge and can double as seats or stack.

Another option, if your dp would go for it and if it would fit, is a loft bed for the adults, which would free up the floor space underneath for dsd bed and maybe other stuff.

Can she sleep on a airbed or camping mat?

We have friends to stay a lot and I just sleep on a self inflating mat on the floor. It's super thin and lightweight but very comfy.

We have a futon as a spare bed. It is quite uncomfortable if you use it on the frame, but if you put it directly on the floor then it is fine.

Thanks everyone for the super helpful replies! Just weighing up options, pros and cons etc. Was just thinking (given up on DPs opinion ) we could get a high sleeper to go horizontally against the wall then have our double bed underneath it vertically? Less expense than buying a new sofa or a triple sleeper bunk. But just concerned because obviously it wouldn't work with the ladder? Anyone know of any high sleepers with a ladder on the end of the bed??

Dorset Pine make beds to order quite inexpensively

www.pinebed.co.uk/

If you google "high sleeper end ladder" there are quite a few hits.

At not quite 4 she is little to be up that high IMO, especially if you have to compromise with an unsloped ladder and she is only there at weekends so it's not her main bed. Could you put her on some sort of floor bed for a year or so? It's not taking away her "proper" bed really if you explain now she is big enough for a grown up size bed.

There might come a time (age 9/10?) when it makes sense to start putting her in your bed and you sleeping in the living rooms just at weekends.

Would you be able to move the chest of drawers into another room? It would make getting dressed a bit unconventional but would it free up enough space to get a trundle for her under your bed? Look at bigger toddler beds (both my 2 were in ikea toddler beds past their 5th birthday) and consider 2'6" beds or shorties eg www.oddsizebeds.co.uk or dorset pine linked by Random. I think the high sleeper is a great idea as it gives everyone a bit of privacy but personally I'd wait until she's a bit older.

Another one here who loves the Friheten. About to buy another.

I really think you should sleep in your bedroom, but on weekends have DD in there and you two sleeping on the sofabed. Silly to leave the bedroom basically unused for five days a week.

While you're at Ikea get lots of storage stuff for her new toys