WIBU to only get my son 1 Christmas present?

[aibuornah]

My son wants an expensive present so I have got it for him, but now I'm seriously worried at the idea he will only have 1 gift to open, his brother will have about 15. It's not mean is it?

Having the same idea this year too. 12 year old son got a very expensive birthday present in November, and was told at the time it was birthday and Christmas. He only has a couple of things for Christmas Day, where as 6 year old brother will have a lot more. Have spoken to him about it a few times and he's really not fussed, knows he'll get from relatives too so is quite happy. Maybe reiterate to him that it's a big pressie he's getting and there won't be much else there. Warn him, then he won't be disappointed on the day. :)

My two boys wouldn't be the least concerned about the difference in cost or number of presents. They want what they want. If he is getting presents from other people I wouldn't pad out his present from you.

No problem think it's fine. Mine are getting a ltd edition console between them, then pjs, couple of shirts and some books and deodorant and that's it. DD will look like she's got loads in comparison but the console was £300 so their Xmas budgets halved basically. At 12 they are old enough to know the cost of things and be aware they can't have quantity as well as a very expensive present!

Of course it's fine. You're buying him a big expensive present that he wants, plus he gets a stocking and presents from family. He's lucky!

I really don't get this obsession with counting the number of presents. Treat your children fairly, of course, but equal number of presents doesn't necessarily equal fair.

The idea of buying just for the sake of it (and suggestions for cheap plastic that will soon become landfill are mad) is consumerism gone crazy.

I am in same situation, but also combining birthday and xmas present. feels I am being stingy but its a LOT of money. Think DC understands and that's what they want. Its silly buying lots of presents they never play with.

YANBU
My two boy would have both been fine with one present too. I found my girls liked bits and bobs far more than my boys. Apart from the sweets they weren't fussed about stockings either.

I'd remind him beforehand that you have been fair in what you have spent but I don't think he will care.

Can you afford more? If you can, I'd get a couple more bits to open. If you can't then fine. But I wouldn't be so rigid just because you spent X amount on his brother. You won't always spend the same amount on each kid, especially as they get older and have different interests.

I don't think your being unreasonable, if some pretty much the same, 14 year old wants electronic drum kit- all singing all dancing, with all the add-on's, 4 and 5 year olds havnt quite had same ammount spent, but have sooo much more to open. I feel quite mean, but grand parents and family have bought her a few littler things rather than one or two big ones- so that should help xx I bought lots of little things for her stocking too though.

He's 12 so presumably doesn't believe in Santa any more, I'd just warn him beforehand that as he asked for something big he won't get a lot of other bits - maybe get some toiletries/ socks/ chocolate to give him something to unwrap.

If he's getting a stocking too it's no problem.

I think I'do have bought the x box as a joint present and bought the two of them extra bits to open. Is it too late to do that? I can see the seven year old being the one who's miffed tbh!

When I was about 12 i would usually have a fairly expensive wish and would have fewer things to open than my younger sister.
My mum explained to me at the time that she had a 200€ budget for each of us, so it might be the only thing I had to open. I don't think I ever questioned This, it seemed completely fair to me. Though I still got some sweets, cheapy things. So maybe my mum didn't like the one present v. Pile of toys look.
Explain it to your eldest, I'm sure it will be fine.

I always do same number - I personally couldn't give one child 1 gift and 1 15, regardless of cost.

Can you not make the gift numbers up with socks/pens etc?

I think a 12 year old is old enough to appreciate the value of things and would understand that 15 less expensive presents is the same as one very expensive one.

Don't bother buying tat that won't be used just to pad it out.

I agree. You do not need to make up an equal number of presents with. He's 12, I'm sure he gets it!

Yanbu, you said it was an expensive present, I would probably throw in a few cheap stocking fillers from Wilkos or Home Bargains.

It's hilarious that several posters here seem to know the OP's 7-year-old better than she does, and can proclaim with full confidence that he'll be wildly jealous of the new console. Despite already having one that he's not that bothered with

OP, I'd probably buy two other small presents (books, t-shirts) but leave it at that. (And not feel obliged to increase younger son's already considerable stash by the same amount, by the way.)

what about doing a small stocking with little things too like socks, aftershave, chocolates etc.. as well as the big gift?

Op has already said he'll have a stocking as well...

allow why will my 7 yo be miffed? Surely it's cruel to pretend that the Xbox is a joint gift when I know he won't enjoy it?

Cel I know

I think the issue is not that the older one has 1 present. Tbh most years mine have only had one each. I would have thought one or two big presents and a stocking was the norm. I do think you can't do 15 presents for one and one for the other. What I would do though is wrap up the younger ones in bundles so say he's got 3 Lego kits I'd wrap as one present to try and take it down to 3-5 wrapped parcels and then buy a couple of extra very cheap (or stuff he needs) bits for the older one to make it more even. Don't even need to spend £10 - large selection box, toiletry pack, nice book (Guiness Book of Records for Gamers?) would come to about £9.50.

At 12 personally i would pad it out with a selection box smellies and socks or whatever x box is a good present though he will know that but i get the present thing though you want it to look the same

I would stick to the one gift.

It is not mean - how could it even BE mean, you hve brought him an expensive gift - it is ludicrous just to buy rubbish from the quid shop to ''balance it out'' = what a load of waffle

The multiwrap is a good idea

The reason I don't want to reduce the amount of opening for my DS is because to him that's what he loves, my older son had it when he was younger and it's the fun of finding out what each gift is and opening them, I think it would ruin it a bit if I wrapped 3 together?

I'd pad it out with things you'd buy him anyway like clothes. So you're not introducing junk into the house for no reason but you're also not going wildly over budget because you'd buy those things anyway.

I do think the idea about wrapping the younger child's presents in bundles is a good idea.