After 6 years to give up trying to get DD to eat my home cooking?

[Careerchanger2017]

My DD has never eaten much of her evening meal, when I ask her why she says she doesn't like it. The only meals she likes are chicken nuggets (frozen), fishfingers (frozen), breaded fish (frozen), sausage mash and veg, jackets beans and cheese, home made spaghetti bolognese and a pick and mix style salad. Aibu to just feed her these meals from now on? I'm sick of her refusing meals over and over and then going to bed complaining she is hungry. She won't even eat a roast dinner anymore she is getting worse as she grows up instead of better

Get her to Help you meal plan for her too op. She could colour 7 different menu cards with variations on what she likes to eat and some more difficult foods.

But honestly relax food isn't a battle ground and she will get better.

I swear ds 1 survived on sausages and bread and pasta until he was 6. He's 26 now and a dad. 6 foot 3 abs eats anything.

YABU, you don't just give up on important aspects of parenting that have long term implication for her health just because it's hard.

Keep going with the healthy food. Make the junky stuff a weekend treat and you will find that she does eventually come around.

Also ignore totally the comments who say 'she will eat when she's hungry' as some kids just won't. People who say this have no idea what it's like to have a fussy eater.

inThenic

How helpful there.

Your list of meals sounds normal and fine. My DS eats very similar, and I've never thought to describe him as picky.

My dh went through a phase of only eating biscuits when he was that age. He eats everything now.

Could you try, may be when you're not busy, putting food on the table to serve yourselves? That way she could help herself to what she wants and maybe feel as though she has a little more control over it. We sometimes do tapas style meals (cubes fried potatoes, a couple of veg dishes, pitta, dips and lamb chops) and ky little boy loves it.

If you worried about the fish fingers not being healthy enough have you considered making them yourself and getting your dd to help make them. They are really easy to make. Chop some fish, dip it in egg and then in breadcrumbs. Same goes for nuggets

My DD was similar at that age, a very fussy eater. Two minuet noodles, sausages and carrots was about all she ate.

At 17, she is willing to try most things, she eats most vegetables and practically every fruit there is, although she is still a fussy meat eater (has to be no fat whatsoever or bones) and she still likes processed meat.

Thank you for all the replies. I'll have another go at making home made chicken nuggets and will try home made fish fingers too. I did have a go at making my own ketchup before but that didn't go down well!

It's good to hear of others with fussy eaters. My DS is 22 months and really fussy though he'll east most things at nursery. On Sunday he ate half a cinnamon bagel, some fruit wriggles, 2 spoonfuls of risotto, 5 chunks of watermelon, 1fruit/oaty bar, 3 spoonful's of baked beans, a yogurt and 3 pringles. It really upsets me. But I cant make him eat.

Oh and fussy eaters don't eat when they're hungry. My DS lost 4lbs in a week on holiday this summer.

I persevered for 12 years with ds- and lo, we have success! He was overheard the other day musing over why some people eat such unhealthy food.

That is not to say that I made it a battle ground. It is not a choice between serving chicken nuggets every day or constantly arguing about food. Perfectly possible to put a pot of home cooked stew on the table and smile sweetly while he helps himself to a teaspoonful. Just don't look at their plate for the next 12 years.

Obviously if you have a child with sensory issues who would rather put themselves in hospital than eat something of the wrong colour/texture, then that is a different kettle of fish.

But in the case of a normally fussy eater, a compromise, where they get something the like once or twice a week and you don't grumble about their eating the rest of the time, might work ok. Ds admittedly got rather thin. But not undernourished. And we had very few arguments about food.

If they'd rather starve than eat it yanbu. Life's too short to stress over food everyday.

It's an absolute bloody battleground, yes. DS1 is 5 and ate everything as a small tot. Now he'd rather go hungry than eat most meals, unless it's beige and out of the freezer. He improves a fair bit when he's due a growth spurt, so I KNOW it's not as if he hates everything I cook, but the rest of the time he just whines and says he wanted 'something good' for dinner, like nuggets.

I agree with Showme - try getting her to help you. She might want to eat something she'd proud of making. Start with her helping on something she will eat (getting fish fingers out of the packet and keeping an eye on when they're ready!) and work up to new stuff. And try and make it fun too when she's helping (I've bought myself an electric potato masher and can't wait to play with it!)

I'm not quite getting why the OP should be making her own fish fingers. What's in the frozen ones, arsenic?

To answer my own question, Birdseye fish fingers have:

Ingredients
Cod Fillet (Fish) (58%),
Breadcrumb (Wheat Flour, Water, Salt, Yeast, Paprika, Turmeric),
Rapeseed Oil,
Water,
Wheat Flour,
Potato Starch

Hardly going to harm her!

I'm not quite getting why the OP should be making her own fish fingers. What's in the frozen ones, arsenic? hmm

I can't believe you would let your child go to bed hungry! Heartbreaking, I suspect you are creating the issues yourself by being so strict around what she must eat.

As a child I ate everything, but then as a teenager I had weird issues around food. My sister basically refused to eat anything as a child but as an adult loves cooking and healthy food far more than I do. Her diet doesn't sound too bad and views on food aren't set in stone forever.

Totally agree about the homemade nuggets and fish fingers... Why!? You can get really good ones already made.

Because you can add other things to them so that you know she's getting different veg etc.

Absolutely, bollocks to homemade fish fingers.

OP, DS1 is the same age as your DD, and he'll eat pretty much anything these days. But between ages 2 and 4ish he pretty much lived on frozen chicken nuggets, chips and apples. He refused any form of vegetable and anything home cooked. What worked for us was the three bite rule - when trying a new food he has to have three mouthfuls. If he still doesn't like it, he doesn't have to eat it, but he has to have those three mouthfuls before I'll make aything else. I also served bread and butter with every meal for a while - at least he had something to eat then, so he wasn't going hungry. I hope that helps, it sucks having a fussy eater but it does get easier. As long as she's eating something she'll be fine.