To think people should be aware of the paedophiles who troll on here

[IPityThePontipines]

Stating the obvious:

This site is very popular. Anyone could could be reading and posting on here.

Threads which seem to encourage people to talk about sexual behaviour in preteens, probably aren't from a concerned parent and for many, many reasons, it's not wise to go into great details about your own exploits and make out that sexual activity in under 16's is no big deal.

Not a TAAT, as there's been loads of threads like this, but they seem to be increasing in number and frequency.

I never once disagreed that posting about sex toys for children is utterly peculiar and unreasonable.

I was talking to danTDM about their comments to the user Frumpet, who didn't say anything odd, unreasonable or over the line at all.

It is perfectly clear from my post what Inwas referring to and it is deeply silly to start bringing up other examples when I was very specific about the comments I was referring to.

dear nichito I must have misunderstood. Apologies.

namechange and Manumission I haven't seen the threads you're referring to and I have no doubt that somewhere or other someone could be getting an inappropriate thrill from it.( as they may well be from the Mothercare catalogue). What I have found professionally is that people are super hyped about the prospect of paedophiles lurking everywhere in a capital letter sort of way ( Warning PAEDOPHILES) but then demonstrate other beliefs that I find contradictory....for example not putting parental controls on technology, allowing children to have phones / computers in their rooms, and of course the biggie not believing children when they disclose abuse. Because of course the PAEDOPHILE is always a lurking stranger and never someone in the family. At the end of the day I'm more concerned about the person laying his hands on the child rather which I consider to be a more pressing matter than the individuals deriving cheap thrills from any threads on here.

Ooh dear...vocabulary fail

Well paeodophiles are the specific focus of pontypines's warning on this thread, but it's not just that type of thread/troll that's a worry.

It applies to lots of subjects.

Something an OP just "smells" wrong.

sometimes

How very dramatic

I'm a bit curious about the mother and the 12 year old and the vibrator but simultaneously feel depressed at the prospect of knowing anything about it at all.

Basically, you do not want to know about it OR HEAR ABOUT EVERYONE ELSES SMALL CHILDREN. But most were willing to share. They were cool you see.

The sex talk about children sounds a bit intrusive to their privacy personally, but the stuff on adult sex here is really rather tame.

I'm not being mean to mumsnet, but it's not where I'd go for sexual advice. There are many forums where sex is discussed far more openly than here, so I can't see why anyone would come here for that kind of cheap thrill.

dan

You appear to be indicating that you think posters giving actual descriptive details of a graphic nature about their young children is occuring frequently..

Or do you just mean a few posters say words to the effect of 'Yep faily usual my kid did is no big deal'

Because those two things are very different

I've been on mumsnet for over 10 years and tonight was stunned at what posters were revealing about their children on a clearly disturbing thread.

it wasn't good and I am simply ageing with the OP.

You had to have been there, it was a super odd thread. Honestly.

I am not ageing. I am agreeing with the OP!

If your meaning the one that was deleted earlier about the 12yo I did see it and granted only the first few pages but I didn't see anything that looked like graphic personal stuff

Ive just seen pp talking about a poster liking older children in nappies, i feel sick i posted about bedwetting not long since,...thats not even sexual!

I think that refraining from sharing is the best way to deal with this. I also believe that people should be able to talk about sex, masturbation or simply rashes like a PP mentioned as they're part and parcel of being a parent.

I think a good proportion of AIBU threads are started by trolls

I also think the Relationship threads should not be shown on Trending

erm....danTDM i am the poster you refer to above and while i have agreed with you thus far i do want to point out that it was obvious i was being sarcastic about buying my ds one of those things. i wasnt at all surprised that noone wanted to answer my question "is it appropriate?" without trying to squirm around it by saying its different [hm]

or did some disgusting person trying to be a cool mummy like op actually go on to the thread after i left it in disgust to say they had actually bought their ds one?

unless of course

IPity , I just didn't like what I felt was the insinuation that anyone's sexual experience under the age of 16 makes them in some way bad or abnormal . All I was trying to put across was that some people have sex before this age , i was not suggesting that it should be the norm , just that on the spectrum of when sexual behaviour starts it can be . I also clearly stated that my point of reference was from my experience and that of people I knew , granted that was a very long time ago .

Agree OP and I just won't share details. I did read an article years ago about trolls and peadophiles and apparently they have ways of introducing stories which are like "flags" to others of a similar mindset. They look out for each other all over the place.

I get that the OP and many posters agreeing don't want to share certain personal details, and that's fine (no one is compelling anyone to write anything on the internet), and I don't see a problem with warning that not every poster the internet is genuine (but everyone should know that surely...) But I don't really get the absolute insistence that no one else share, or the 'horror' expressed at knowing this could be read by someone getting off it.

If someone is comfortable telling a story they can. If a pervert somewhere gets off on it, so what? How does it harm the person posting? I don't buy the 'its makes peadophiles feel justified' argument, because sick people justify things in all kinds of contradictory ways (I.e. 'I knew they wanted x because they smiled at me', 'they didn't smile at me so they deserved x'). There is no magic behaviour that makes anyone safe. Not posting anything a stranger might wank over won't make you safer.

And the whole 'you don't know who anyone is in the internet' thing cuts both ways. You dont know the stories being shared are true, the children who's privacy is allegedly being invaded might not even exist.

Nobody is 'unwittingly' writing on mn. We are all making a choice.

it's not wise to go into great details about your own exploits etc

The OP is preaching to the converted, the advice won't reach the right audience of people who are oblivious to the dangers of over sharing on the Internet. They are the same people who live out the lives of their DC on social media publishing shed loads of kiddy photos on a daily basis

It's a big social issue when people with no social filters have free and easy access to social media without any education on Internet usage. If they behave inappropriately on the internet they probably will in RL too and vice versa. Sadly their DC will mimic the same levels of inappropriateness, but that's stating the bleedin obvious I know.

tbh i dont think that particular thread was from someone with suspicious intent, otherwise half of the posters on that thread would have been suspicious as they couldnt see the issue and were encouraging the op.