To make DD cut her hair

[foamybananasweets]

DD is 10yo and has hair almost to her bum. She loves having long hair. She also loves swimming and trains with a squad 4x a week.

2 of those sessions are on week days and she gets out of the pool at 9pm. If she doesn't wash her hair it gets really horrible due to talc in hat and chlorine from water. She takes an age to wash her hair (there really is tonnes of it as its thick) and with drying it something like dry (not totally dry) she is rarely in bed before 10pm. And this is me doing everything I can to rush her... This is too late for her, and she is foul to be around, especially in the mornings as she is tired.

AIBU to say it's swimming or the long hair?

Takes me back to when I swam for a club as a teenager and we used to spend ages pissing about in the showers. I never had long hair though. Sometimes me and my friend were in there so long that the staff turned the lights out because they wanted to close up

I would just brush it through dry and put her to bed. Maybe tie it up the next day?

Surely she can just wash it in the showers at the pool, turban in the way home and bed in plaits or just with hair spread over pillow. It will be mainly dry by morning.
I wouldn't force a cut when you still have to do washing and drying.

She is still modelling herself on Jessie from toy story

All her friends are getting their hair cut, but she is resolute she has to keep hers as long as possible. I've tried admiring short hair cuts, but she doesn't really compare herself to others so it's water off a ducks back.

I'll talk to our hairdresser about layers. She knows DD well.

No don't force her to cut it please. If she choses that she will telll you but cmon you both have to respect this personal choice.

Im not a layers fan but hair dresser does run thinning scissors through my hair to take weight out of it

don't suppose you could save up for one of those fancy Dyson dryers... they're supposed to dry it in a fraction of the time of normal ones, and make it smoother too.

When you say she has complex disabilities, do you mean physical and/or mental? A 10-year-old girl is old enough to have an opinion on her hair and see it as part of her identity. If she's actually younger than that, whether or not you're being unreasonable is harder to answer.

If she likes braiding her hair, layering will make it more difficult/messier. Layering is what you have cut into your hair when you predominantly like to leave your hair down.

Don't tie it up wet. Wet hair is more elastic and as it dries it will shrink and snap.

All microfiber towels are NOT equal, will find the ££ but brilliant one and link

The brand is Aquis

Here is a link aquishair.co.uk/products/lisse-luxe-hair-towel I have that length hair and need a towel not the turban!!! The other microfiber towels were rubbish in comparison.

I agree ditch the talc. Also if you wet your hair with fresh water first it doesn't absorb the chlorine anything like as much.

She has physical disabilities and autism, sensory processing disorder and anxiety. (Explaining her issues is a thread in its self!) she isn't very sporty at all on dry land so it's a minor miracle she is part of a sports club of any kind! I just wish it wasn't so late at night!

Wow! That's quite a pricy towel!! But if cuts out the need for blow drying...

small suggestion. Have you tried a lycra hat? much easier to put on and comfier, with no hair pulling. then you could loose the talk.

Don't make her have it cut - at the moment it is part of her identity at a time when girls are very looks-conscious; before long she will want it cut herself.

I managed to get one that is about 1m x 60cm on ebay - I think it was before their website got all updated - so old stock I guess.

It is amazing though!

My mum made me have my hair cut as a child (probably about 9). I was never girly, very much a tomboy and didn't care about fashion or looks but the one girly thing I've always wanted is long hair. I was miserable for quite a while and it's really stuck with me.
I'd look into better hair dryers and towels. I would of rather of had a hair dryer/posh hair towels for my birthday/Christmas than of been forced to of had it cut. In fact I'd still rather have that!

all that constant washing and drying and plaiting can't be good for the hair surely?

Perhaps try her from the 'healthy hair' angle and don't cut it all off, but get her used to the idea that a regular trim (inch off each time) every 6 weeks is needed to keep the hair healthy? (get rid of damaged/split end...etc)

If she won't go for the chop, maintenance trims might go in your favour.

How about a fabric cap for swimming? It would negate the need for talc.

www.swimbabes.co.uk/swim-accessories/swimming-accessories/caps

You can get microfibre hair towels in any poundland for much cheaper than that, OP.

I also have very thick, very long hair down to nearly my bum. There's no way in hell it can dry in 15 minutes.
I do, however, put it in a turban for however long I can, scrunch out any more moisture that I can - and then wrap it up in another turban for sleeping. (I sometimes rip it off anyway and sleep with it loose).

My hair is still damp in the morning but then dries fine... It doesn't have to be too much of a hassle.

Why do sessions at the pool finish so late? Regardless of the hair issue, with which I deeply sympathise, by the way, it seems wrong for an activity for children of your daughters age to be arranged for getting out of the pool at 9pm on weekdays. Surely other children in the group are suffering from getting to bed so late, as well, and it cant be doing their school work and overall health any favours. Is it worth getting together with other families in the group and making representations to the activity organisers and maybe also to the people who run the scheduling for allocating session times for groups to use the pool. Some people genuinely don`t realise that a nine o clock finish for ANY activity on a weekday is just too late for a ten year old.

Bcngran, i totally agree, especially as some of the children are as young as 7, (majority are 9 or 10) but having talked to the other parents their kids seem to get used to it and still function. They aren't bothered about the time. I know some kids have quit because they couldn't keep up at school and swim all the hours under the sun, but it is seen as weeding out the ones who don't have the commitment.

We are always the last out of the centre, (cos of her hair, her general slowness on dry land and her desire to pee about in the showers with her friends) so I imagine some of the other kids are home by 9:15! (Still too late imo)

I got my dd's hair cut significantly for very similar reasons. She is similarly aged and I spoke to her about it and she agreed to try having it cut and see how she got on. It's been cut for several months now and she can see the benefits for herself and wants to keep it shorter. One of her friends did the same so that helped a lot.

And I've spoken to the teacher about her not being last out of the pool, but it's a tricky one as the older kids get out 5 mins earlier than the younger ones (they have been swimming for 2 1/2h!) and they are very raucous in the showers and DD can't cope with it. They are also all done within 5 minutes tho.

Half the boys don't even shower and are dressed and strolling out of the centre before DD and her friends (all with long hair) have found their kit and meandered round to the showers