AIBU to expect newborn congratulatory card/gift from SIL?

[Bushybrenda1]

So, DS is a couple of months old now and has not received so much as a bloody card from his aunt & uncle. AIBU to feel totally pissed off by this? They don't ever ask about him, how he's getting on,absolutely nothing. When we're in their company they only talk about themselves and their pregnancy. It infruriates me, it's like they aren't willing to acknowledge their nephew. Their DD is due next month and I will make a fuss of baby even though my son hasn't received the same from them, I'm not petty. How should I treat our relationship with in laws if things don't improve when their DD is born? I can't stand by and let my son be ignored.

My sister (whom I'd previously got on well with) showed zero interest after the birth of my baby 3 years ago (only baby in a small family, my siblings and I all in our 30s). Since then she's gone from zero interest/Birthday/Christmas presents/cards (no Birth/Christening card/gift) to last Christmases full on expensive presents. I no longer get a Birthday card/gift/acknowledgement. No idea what I've 'done wrong' (am a lone parent/chronic health issues though no idea what bearing these things might have on the situation!). Sister has never wanted kids, has a husband, enough cash, no fertility issues I am privy to. My family and I are at a loss (and no one will 'dare' rock the boat and ask her) and I've long since given up caring.

Two things I've learned since breeding: I understand people less and less as I get older. People are on the whole completely batshit.

Focus on those who care a lot about you and your child, build up a small but strong network then ignore ignore ignore any naysayers.

My SIL hasn't asked about my pregnancy once (am 38 weeks) and is notoriously tight so I am not expecting a gift

The honest truth is I don't think she likes me very much. What can you do, eh?

God I didn't realise there were so many arsehole SIL out there!

Me and mine got along great before pregnancy. When I found out about baby and told her it was clear things had changed.
She slags her dh inlaws off all and was horrible about her SIL when she was pregnant too, so I shouldn't be surprised I guess. Didn't notice much until I was on the receiving end of the weird behaviour.

I Wouldn't expect a card from everyone, including family, abd certainly not a present. It's lovely when you get them but not compulsory.... It dies however soubd like they are very self involved, which given that they already have children abd are rxpecting is surprising. You would expect more empathy from them rather than childless people....

It sounds like she is jealous that her children aren't the only ones in the family. My aunt was very pleased with herself when she had the first child in the family. She was less than pleased 3 months later when I came along (so I have been told). She has always been a bit funny with me. Some people want their children to be the only ones so they can get all the attention from their relatives. I love it when there is all new baby in the family and can't wait to have more nephews and hopefully some nieces too. I wouldn't dream of ignoring a family birth by not getting a card and present. I think it's really rude not to do this tbh. It will be up to DH to sort SIL out though so he can deal with it. He is notoriously crap and forgetful but I'm not reminding him.