TO stop contacting people to see if they ever contact me.

[doyouwantamedalorsomething]

A few things have happened recently that have made me realise there are a few people that never contact me. They always respond if I text them and are happy to meet but never suggest arrangements.

I've had a bit of a difficult time and it really highlighted when I wasn't making the effort who I would never speak to again.

Am I being petty? I feel like if someone hasn't heard from me for months and isn't bothered that I haven't texted them then maybe I don't want to make the effort anymore.

I tried that with one friend too - it's three years since I heard from them

Oh it is so liberating when you do this! I was in exactly the same boat, fed up of always doing the running and feeling like noone was interested in return. Like a PP says, I'm still waiting to hear from most of them! But its wonderful because I dont care or have to feel guilty about it anymore. Can count my friends on one hand but am far more content than when I thought I had lots :)

I did this with one of my supposed best friends. At first it was definitely a 50/50 friendship we used to chat on the phone, text, visit each other, nights out etc regularly.

i noticed a shift when I was going through a shit time and needed a bit of support. But I tried not to put on her too much. Anyway couple of months later comes my birthday (we always did something for our birthdays) I phoned her. She already had plans for another friends birthday but added "you can come of you want" I went out with them anyway but was a bit miffed that she wouldn't have given me a second thought if I hadn't phoned.

Contacted her a few times after that but realised that she never contacted me, thought fuck this lets do the wait game. Its been 11 years, never heard from her again.
Now by pure coincidence I came face to face with her on Tuesday in a place that there was no way to avoid her. It was awkward but we passed small talk about what we were doing now I had my youngest dd and ds with me who were 2 and 7 at last contact (now 13 and 18) and I knew that I'd made the right decision to end contact back then as she couldn't even remember the names of any of my dcs.....great for a ten year friendship!!

I did the same and now have no friends at all! I'm in the early stages of developing a couple of new ones but am determined not to be the one who arranges everything all the time

Having said that, if you do want to go down this route be prepared for incredible feelings of abject loneliness as you spend yet another night slumped on the sofa watching crappy tv instead of sitting in a pub/wine bar/somewhere with a group of friends!

Ive been waiting to hear from a friend since August. She cancelled our arrangement that I had organised and I replied with 'ok let me know when you're free next' I'm still waiting.
It will be interesting to see if she gets in touch in a couple of weeks as it's my ds birthday and we always send cards and gifts.

I did this once but with a family member. We didn't speak for 18 months!

Tomorrrow DH and i are going out for dinner with friends who only ever call when they need favours doing (which costs us time & money). Am hoping they offer to pay for the meal as payback.

Nope. I did this years ago after uni with some "friends". Never heard from them again!

I did this with three friends, stopped contact or any social media interaction in Oct 2014. None of them have noticed. It still upsets me. I childishly cut contact, still have them on FB, they occasionally "like" things. I should unfriend etc but I totally unreasonably want to see how long it takes.

I'm so relieved it's not just me that feels like this!