AIBU about snacks..

[TheRandomer]

Picking DD (5years) up from school I was met by the teacher who informed me that DD had missed playtime due to taking another childs snack. All children have access to fruit from the school as a snack which my DD has.

Now obviously taking another childs food is wrong and this has been discussed with her and suitably disciplined. However am I AIBU to think the school should not br allowing sugary snacks? it is little wonder this could conflict with those eating fruit and healthier options.

Just asking for opinions before I speak to the teacher tomorrow!

We had a similar problem when my DC was in year 1. School rules were no crisps or chocolate in packed lunch boxes. We complied. Then i found out my DD was helping herself to other kids' lunchboxes, she was was taking crisps and chocolate that other kids had been given by parents.

No she shouldn't have taken anything that belonged to another child and she got told off for it. However I'm with you OP in that it's hard to expect a 5/6 year old child to be able to resist 'forbidden' foods.

Tough one OP, I understand why you are cross.

Then don't send her to school with sugary snack then..

Wow, your child is a bully, no one is to blame but you.

A bully? Way to do hyberpole!

You are being a bit unreasonable, but I can understand why, I hate my DD eating snacks as there is then zero chance that she'll eat a proper dinner. I'd prefer there to be a no sugary treat rule in schools, unless for medical reasons.

no one can agree of what constitute "healthy food" for their children and some school rules are absolutely ridiculous. It's not up to the school to ban food that is too attractive for your own child however.

YABU

I was always under the impression schools promoted healthy eating so am suprised to hear of what snacks are being brought in.

Perhaps the children bringing in non-fruit snacks have an eating disorder (underweight) or a digestive problem (allergy) or a disability (autism). Our son eats crisps as his snack, because it's that or toast or nothing - and nothing is not an option that his dietitian would agree with!

Eggy I said something similar - I know 2 children who are allowed different snacks, one is underweight so eats breadsticks, yogurts, etc, and one suffers from very bad constipation so is allowed smoothies.

All though your life other children will have stuff your child can't.

Doesn't matter whether it's because you can't afford it or you don't think it's right for them, there will always appear to be times what they don't have will seem more attractive than what they do.

Doesn't mean you can go take it.

Learning to suck it up is one of the most important lessons in life. It's a stepping stone to both self control and respect for others.

So no you don't go moaning to the school about how unfair it is. You put that energy into teaching your child to value what they have.

'before I speak to the teacher tomorrow!'
What exactly do you want to say to the teacher?

'she would rather have a sugary marshmallow bar than an apple and is now asking for those items. Which I am reluctant to send her to school with...'
So don't. There's no issue here - send her with an apple.

The healthy eating is a red herring here.

This should be split into two threads, one for "my school allows sugary snacks and I don't approve AIBU?" And the real one "I am embarrassed that my DD stole something at school, how do I deflect the blame away from me as a parent?"

Thanks catsnickedallmypens. At last someone understands my confusion!

Were you there onthecouchagain? To know that my child bullied another? She took a snack and gave it back. She is no way shape or form a bully. If you knew her, you would know that. But thanks for the congrats. If she needs any more pointers on unreasonable behaviour I'll be sure to point her in your direction.

The general consensus seems to be AIBU so i will not enquire with teacher about their snacks policy. But i will continue to give my DD fruit and ensure she no longer tries to take someone elses food! Thank you all for your input!

Lots of parents send crap food in for lunch and snacks in my ds's school. Makes no difference to us as our food is consistently healthy. It's a good lesson in not bending to peer pressure and not blindly following the crowd.

Kids need to learn they can't just have what they want. If another kid had a cereal bar and your kid has fruit thats just tough luck.

Sorry but YABU

I think you've done the correct thing by putting your DS straight.

Wait till after xmas, then email the head about the snacks and being healthy.

Ps. There are no dietary issues here as this has been a frequent suggestion.

What you have to realise is that circumstances are sometimes different - I have to send extra snacks into school with my DS and some of that snack will be fruits/cheese/biscuits/choc spread sandwich etc because he takes a medication which has a side effect of him needing lots of extra calories- his school does promote healthy eating - but also realise that in some circumstances flexibility is needed.

One incident like this doesn't make your child a bully.

so by your reckoning everyone should have the exact same thing at school just incase your child might be tempted to take it?

OP, if your thread went something like this, I think you would have got the response you wanted:

"In my DD's school they can bring in a snack. AIBU to think that because the school is promoting healthy eating kids shouldn't bring in marshmallowy bars? Surely the teachers should be promoting fruit etc, like what I provide my DD..."

the stealing food and healthy snack things are two completely different issues methinks?

How do you know there are no dietary issues? If there are they would be confidential!

I am not trying to deflect from what DD has done. We have dealt with that. Both the school and at home. I support the teachers in what they did and said. I set the scene because it was how I became aware of what others were taking into school. I always thought it was healthy snacks only as the school apperently promotes this. I reiterate i am not embarrassed as shes a kid. Kids do daft things. It has been dealt with!

OP how do you know there aren't any dietary issues? My DD takes a piece of cake/brownie/biscuits and carton of chocolate milk in for her snack every day for health reasons. 3 or 4 of the children (and their parents) in a class of 30 know why but it's certainly not something in 5 years at school have I broadcast to the rest of the class.

There could be any number of reasons why a child brings in an 'unhealthy' snack

X post chicken!

maybe your daughter doesn't actually like fruit, which is pretty sugary in itself tbf

why not ask her what she would like as a snack?