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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

House buying - location or house?

77 replies

Maz2444466 · 22/11/2016 22:07

I've been going round in circles and driving DH nuts by putting off buying a house for two years now even though we are in a flat and really need the extra space, largely because I still can't figure out what I want so here are the options:

The first option is to get a house in the town we live in which we absolutely love, it is within walking distance of childrens' classes, great parks, shops and my parents house but the house will be nothing like the house in the alternative option.

The alternative option is to get a beautiful house in a quiet (isolated) village near the town we currently live in. It's a 10 minute drive from the town but problem is I don't drive Blush so it would mean a 20 minute bus ride, the bus comes every 20 minutes or so, sometimes it stops halfway and you have to get another one so a 20 minute journey can turn into a 30 or 40 minute one.

In the village we could get a substantial detached house with a 100ft garden but in the town we are in we could get a semi with a garden half the size, probably on an overcrowded road since the whole town is overcrowded.

Schools seem more or less as good as each other in both options.

What would you do?

OP posts:
blinkineckmum · 22/11/2016 22:38

Learn to drive.

Capricorn76 · 22/11/2016 22:38

Location.

DamePlata · 22/11/2016 22:40

locationX3

PickAChew · 22/11/2016 22:41

I'd go with the best location where you can afford a house that meets your needs. If the semi with a bit of garden would meet your needs, then stick with your current lovely location. You don't have to stay there forever, if your circumstances improve sufficiently.

BewtySkoolDropowt · 22/11/2016 22:45

A bus every 20 minute sounds blissful! Personally I would go for the better house, it also sounds to me like the better location, but then I'm not a fan of overcrowded. Some people love it, and it sounds like house 1 is the better location for you, so you should probably go for that one.

Blondeshavemorefun · 22/11/2016 23:25

They always say location

Tho if you can drive then bigger house out of town wouldn't be a problem

The over crowded /might not be able to park with smaller garden wouldn't appeal to me

BackforGood · 22/11/2016 23:29

Always location.
where people will disagree is which the "better" location is.
The fact you don't drive will limit you - and your dc - a lot, so, you need to decide if the bigger house and bigger garden are incentive enough to persuade you to learn to drive.

NotWeavingButDarning · 22/11/2016 23:31

Personally I'd go for the Village and learn to drive or get a bike, but that is because I prefer rural and villages. If you prefer towns then don't buy in a village. Simple.

everythingtoplayfor · 22/11/2016 23:32

Learn to drive!!?! No brainer...

Confusednotcom · 22/11/2016 23:38

I'd say location wins out. What does your dp prefer?

Beaverlac · 22/11/2016 23:44

On his property programme Phil Spencer said he'd always choose location over house, on the basis that you can make changes to a house, but not to a location.

Maz2444466 · 22/11/2016 23:44

Okay, I definitely see a pattern, need to learn to drive :) DH is very flexible, he has no problem with driving everywhere so he prefers the idea of a bigger house further out but he does also like the convenience of everything on our doorstep where we are. I think though, all in all, if he saw a beautiful house in the village it'd win him over.

OP posts:
MrEBear · 22/11/2016 23:53

Smaller house in town.

I'm assuming that this is your house for life. Driving solves the issue for you now but what about when kids get bigger want to meet friends etc are you going to be their taxi?
If parents are doing emergency child care being closer is helpful
What about when you are too old to drive?

Stillunexpected · 22/11/2016 23:55

In the two years you have been dithering about this, why haven't you learned to drive?

Maz2444466 · 23/11/2016 00:03

Hahaha stillunexpected good point!

MrEBear Having my parents so close is such a plus. I mean we can just stop by, I think when DC are in school it will be different but for now they are under 5 so we spend a lot of time at my parents house. Love being able to just walk there and it's good exercise for us.

I guess we are going to have to take each house on its merit and go with gut instinct. We are putting our flat on the market in the new year and will be forced into action!

OP posts:
liletsthepink · 23/11/2016 09:28

Location.

  1. When your DC are older it's better for them to be able to go out on their own.
  1. Relying on buses is a nuisance especially in bad weather.
  1. The cost of running a second car will make a big difference to family finances.
  1. It's much easier to find local work near to a town centre.
  1. Does the town centre have good transport links? Is there a train station? If so, that gives you and your family far more options for work, leisure and shopping.
  1. Having a big garden is lovely but it makes for a lot of extra work unless you love gardening or are prepared to pay a gardener.

I think you'd regret living in a village without being able to drive. Good luck, whatever you decide!

liletsthepink · 23/11/2016 09:30

Point 3 should also say 'if you learn to drive'

Blackfellpony · 23/11/2016 09:33

We went for location and compromised with a slightly smaller house. Glad we did as I love living somewhere peaceful.

Saying that I would chose the villiage if I was you as I love being rural!

user1470997562 · 23/11/2016 09:42

I would go for the town myself. As an ex Londoner I'd rather have things walkable on my doorstep. We picked the town and it now means my dc can tottle round to friends' houses, walk into town with friends, get to school and back (do think about where the secondary schools are) very easily without involving me. It means we can manage with one car.

I would also find it hard socially to live in a village though so perhaps I'm biased. I don't drive either and waiting for buses is tedious for me.

ginorwine · 23/11/2016 09:44

Please may I jump on this thread foradvise also ? We have a great terrace in a fab area - however the nearness of neighbours after 16 happy years and my menopausal grumpy stuff - ! Means that the normal nearness noise now really annoys and I yearn for detatatched ! Where I live there are only about 4 detatched Victorian terraced and they will never at 500k be in our reach financially . In order to get a detatched it wd mean living out of town in a bungalow .
I've done my research .
I've always thought location - here we have a walk to town , fab views, arts and community centre - but I can hear my neigbour s talking thro the wall etc. I'm worried that the peace of the bungalow idea may mean losing too much and I have no idea how to test it . We can't afford to move if we get it wrong . Any thoughts ..

MauiWest · 23/11/2016 09:47

It's such a hard choice. Usually, I would say location, but I could not live in a semi if I had another choice. The neighbours would drive me mad, and I love the freedom of making my own noise. I have lived in flats for years with young children, so a detached house is bliss. Being able to let them play, to hoover at 6am, run washing machine at 11pm, anything really, it's a dream after tip toeing for years to respect the neighbours. I can have an early night any Saturday I want because I don't have noisy neighbours having a gathering next door. I wouldn't change that for the world.

So to answer your question, if the choice is small detached/ great location vs lovely big detached/ small village: I take the small detached.
If the choice is semi vs detached: I take detached any day (in a good location, obviously, choice of schools come first)

VanellopeVonSchweetz99 · 23/11/2016 09:49

Always having to drive or rely on public transport is awful.

I grew up like that; lovely house, lovely village.
Never again.

Sohardtochooseausername · 23/11/2016 09:51

We had this choice and went for a tiny flat in the city centre, in a very des res area with lots of trees and space. We haven't regretted it once. DD would like a garden but she loves being able to walk to school, go to the park etc. I can walk to work (and home from a night out.) I'd say being close to what you do every day is way better than having to drive everywhere (and I only passed my test at Easter this year at the grand old age of 38.)

leddeeburdee · 23/11/2016 09:53

Location. We've done three house moves now. Two based on location, one based on the house. The second move was the one where we prioritised the house and the one that we spent most time being frustrated with, it was rural and about a ten minute drive from town. We're now back in town and loving it. I may wish to be rural again when we retire, but for now with school age children who will soon wish to be going in and out of town independently, this move gives us all far more freedom.

museumum · 23/11/2016 09:54

Can you walk or cycle from the village to the town? A ten min drive must be only about a mile or two?
I would stay in town if it's really not walkable or cyclable, it's not just you that has to get to and from your house, it's your kids when they're older and their friends and any guests you have etc etc.