About who has their own room?

[SouthernNorthernGirl]

My DH and I are not sure what's the fair thing to do here.
We have 2 boys, 1 girl. DS1 is 13yrs, DS2 is 8yrs and DD is nursery age. We have 1 box room, and 1 smallish double room between them.
Currently DS1 has the box room. I think that he needs to swap with DD, and the boys share the double room.

DS1 insists he needs the room to himself. DS2 says he wants to share with DS1 now, not DD. They are all quite close to each other, though recently DD has been waking DD2 up early.
DH says DD won't like to sleep alone (probably true)

To complicate things a bit more, DS1 isnt at school. He has a series of online tutors.
DS2 and DD attend primary / nursery. DS2 is currently under assessment.

What should sleep where?

I think a teenage boy needs his own room if at all possible.

I grew up in a similar house with my brother and sister. We all shared one large double bedroom, but my parents split the room with bunk beds. So the bunk bed stuck out into the room with plasterboard on one side from floor to the bottom of the top bunk, then on the other side from the ceiling to the top bunk. Each "room" was pretty small, but it gave us some space of our own.

I'd let DS1 have his own room for a while longer

The two boys can share they are close enough on age to do so (5 years isn't that big a gap!) - it's not like you are trying to put a 13 and 2 year old in together! Your 8 year old is getting older and in a couple of years will likely appreciate not sharing with his little sister a great deal. Oh and your daughter will get used to having a room on her own.

I'd say DS1 needs his own space given his age, especially if DD is only nursery age

Why does a teenage boy need his own room? Literally millions of teenagers share rooms growing up!

I would definitely have the boys share

I would have the boys share too and put DD in on her own.

If you don't even have your own room, I'm sure your eldest DS can suck it up OP

What is all this nonsense on Mumsnet about teenagers needing their own rooms?? In fact, there seems to be a mentality that all kids need their own rooms. Life isn't always like that,

The boys should share. If you delay it any longer, it might be more difficult for DS1 to "give up" his space.

Lough conversion?

If not then they boys need to share sooner rather than later.

Ideally kids would all have their own rooms but for millions of families that just isn't possible.

The boys should share, with divider of some sort if possible (people saying just throw up a wall for £500 OP might not have a spare £500!) and both have to be considerate about noise/light. It sucks for them but that's life.

It's not illegal for opposite sex siblings to share but it's not ideal as they get older, and since there's another less-bad option, the DD should not have to share as she gets older.

Boys together and daughter in the box room it's the only way really

Boys share, toddler own small room.

We have one bedroom, both our boys have to share the bedroom with us. They thrive.

The whole concept that people need own rooms or will wither away is mad. A huge percentage of the world all sleep as a family together from newborn to death, and several generations all together in one room. Yet on here an 8 and 13 year old sharing is seen as terrible.

Boys should share without any real issues. Girl in the little box room.

Such is life.

Seems the majority opinion is to have the boys share.
I do understand all their views, and it is difficult. I wish we had a way to give them all their own space, we just can't at the moment and it's frustrating.
Soon, hopefully.

I'd really like to hear any suggestions on splitting the room. I feel that's the way to go regardless of who shares.
As a pp mentioned, we don't have the funds for a wall. The room would be far too narrow anyway.

ds1 needs privacy as a teenager. perhaps create a division in the other room with shelving and involve ds2 in how to do it???

if you use open wooden shelving well secured you could let ds2 have the shelving as a way of acknowledging his seniority?? it is very cheap to buy and can be painted any colour.

I would definitely leave things as they are for now. DS1 is a teenager, DS2 isn't, and when you add in the fact that DS1 is home-schooled (online) he absolutely needs his own room if at all possible. I have two boys, 13 and 11, and I would say that your DS2 should be fine to share with his younger sister until he's 12 (or until he starts to show signs of entering physical puberty). By then DS1 will be 17, and maybe you'll even have moved.

It's perfectly fine for two teenagers to share a room, plenty do. DS1 obviously won't be happy at that stage, so you need to make it clear from now that this is what's going to happen in a few years' time.

For now, I like the idea of dividing the larger room somehow for DS2 and DD to have their own space.