Argument with a manchild and now being ignored

[LittleBitSadLittleBitMad]

The cunt! The selfish cunt!
I'm AIBUing this one because there are a couple of reasons I may actually be partly to blame.

So, things had been really bad with us, to the point I was planning to leave and then they plateaued out and I felt like I'd blown the whole relationship problems out of proportion.

Today he sleeps till midday because, fair enough, he was working till midnight. He's working all day tomorrow and said he'd take us (me and dd) out for a lunch before work (think nandos rather than the ivy) . Whilst he's asleep I get a call from my sister saying can I make a birthday massage appointment for 3pm and she'll look after dd in the process. I think, 'great, I can do lunch then go afterwards' too good to turn down right? Dp come out of the bedroom to ask who's been on the phone so I explain. He goes mad shouting that we had plans and his plan was for us to eat late so he would go straight to work from the restaurant. I say that I'd still love to go out for lunch but no! He storms out for a smoke kicking dd's toys across the room and tells me to stay out of the front room. I've been ignored since then and am now on my way for a massage

Reasons why I may be unreasonable: we only had a small window to spend together as a family this weekend and I shortened it by an hour, he was offering a nice thing as we are skint, meals out don't happen often and finally because I made these plans which would impact on our ones without consulting him first.

So AIBU?

Call him out on communication, tantrumming and sulking and say this is not an adult way to behave. You need to be able to resolve conflict or disagreements in a constructive way within your relationship.
It takes two so if you accept this behaviour it will continue.
I've been there!

Last night when he got in I think (I was out for the count) he tried to apologise and I have a half awake memory of turning my back to him.

I'm no good at sustaining arguments though so called and said "are we done now" he said I think so and that's the end of this stupid argument. Thanks for seeing me through it

Thanks Arf I'm definitely getting more assertive so all in all its been a positive argument. There was a time when I wouldn't have even considered my sisters offer for fear of offending him and if I did I'd then be apologising or trying to make it up to him for the next week. Times are changing and he can either grow up and keep a good relationship or he can fuck right off!

Don't forget you said this yesterday:

You know what? I do deserve better.

I think you both have a way to go to grow into the people you'd like to become. Him to grow up and you to recognise and value yourself. Both of these things are what true adults do well. I'm a work in progress on the valuing myself front too.

I won't forget. They're baby steps but in the right direction. He knows things are changing and the way he acts now, going into the future will tell me all I need to know.

Baby steps are good.