Don't want my 8yo to have a games console

[octopusrus]

AIBU?

DS will be 8 in Dec.

I'm pretty anti video games but DH would love to buy a console for his bday (he hasn't asked for one).

I feel he's too young and I want to hold off as long as possible but AIBU and is it inevitable at some point anyway?

Help please, causing a lot of arguments at home.

Mine are allowed 20/30 mins of ipad time a day. Ds(8) discovered minecraft which he loves and has abandoned his beloved nintendo that he got form his 7th birthday. My dc have adhd so a computer game/phone is pretty much essential to get through any meal out

I have a 6y old. She has a tablet and because DH is a gamer, we have the xBOX and the WiiU. They play together and she plays Minecraft on her own. It's always supervised and the games are age appropriate.
There's nothing wrong with games if you supervise your child and their games selections.
We even had her take a cybersecurity course and she is now taking an online course for children on coding. I believe it will make her more ready for life than sheltering her from any digital devices.

I would hold off as long as you can. As a PP said, you end up having to police it. Some children can self regulate, but a lot can't, and I know quite a few boys 10 and up who have unhealthy relationships with screens. Their parents probably thought they'd regulate it too, but it's easy to slip into bad habits - am extra busy time, other siblings needing more attention - and before long the time mounts up and other things - reading, playing with toys- are neglected before you even realise.

I don't think consoles are the devil, but I know they can cause problems with some children, and if he's not asking I wouldn't get him it

It is letting the genie out of the bottle. I cracked, but mine have Kindles which have parental controls (that mean you can set when and for how long they are allowed to play) - it saves a lot of arguments, because they just switch off when the allotted time is up. You can also allow unlimited reading, or set it so that they have to read for a particular amount of time before they can play.

We don't have an X-box or PS and DS1 (now 10) complains that he's the only one at school that doesn't have one (I am sure this isn't entirely true, but it is true amongst the boys he hangs out with). Last year he did get left out of playground games at school which were based on computer games .

YANB remotely U- my 8 year old wants a DS for Xmas and I am really against it. Our compromise is getting a console for our Amazon fire stick tv and he can play a few games on that but I am very against (and can't afford) a DS when it's just going to mean he spends loads of family time playing games. No!

The consoles aren't bad, it's the parenting that is bad.

If you are strict with when they can play and how they can play and you limit them strictly to age appropriate games then consoles are fine.

When they're allowed free range on them, can hook up to their friends (which can result in low level bullying which can escalate and also means they are not getting a break from those children) and allow them to play games which are too old for them then they are not fine.

I am very strict with the PS4. Some of DS1's friends (11) play certificate 15/16/18 games 24/7.

Completely unnecessary too when there are so many great age appropriate games out there.

Why did you buy the iPad? That is an expensive gadget to keep in a cupboard and only use on long journeys...although I suppose it does prove that screens don't have to dominate.
Games consoles are fine for an 8yo, but even I wouldn't buy one for a child who hasn't asked for it.

I is perfectly fine, if he wants to buy it then that's amazing! He saved up for it? Get him a Nintendo Switch, there are adult games on there but they're much less accessible in real life, so not put your credit card onto it and boom, he can only play games you or he buys (with your permission ofc)

Hold off as long as possible. Consoles are just like screens - you can use them to access the internet / other people and I don’t believe any child under 16 has the ability to resist that temptation especially if the console is in their rooms.

I agree with you OP. We have one BUT our ds really wanted one. He spends a lot of time on it and it is addictive. I have to push a lot for him to get his work done. Why get him something he has not asked for? There's plenty of time for gaming!!!

Op I have a 9 year old with a ds and an old wii (desperate for an Xbox for his 10th ) I don't think your ds is too young but as he hasn't asked for one I would wait until he asks for one, the time will come.

We have strict limits on screen time.but he pushes it to the max and tries to get an extra 5/10 minutes here and there he plans his days around his screen time and often moans on days when he doesn't have screen time that he's bored. I think once you've got them you can never go back. So I would wait, if you can get another year or two without it then enjoy that time.

One positive thing I can say though is that my DS does read lots and lots so don't worry about that. He has 4hrs a week on his consoles and has to save 1 for the weekend so normally has 1 hr 3 evenings a week and 2 weekdays off. I let him.choose how he spreads it out but make him save some for the weekend. It doesn't stop him.doing h/w or reading and if it did I would would just cut back on the time he is allowed.

If your dp wants a console let him get one for himself and he can get some multiplay games your son can join in with.

I wouldn't buy one for your son tho, no. I'm a Grinch tho, we do have consoles. We have a PS4, a Wii u and an Xbox.........but they've always belonged to dp and I but we allow DC to use them and buy games if they choose........I hark back to the day when there was kids stuff and adults stuff, I think it's madness how things have turned on their axis and kids are just handed tech worth hundreds of pounds whilst parents often go without to pay for it.

It's worked for us anyways.

Consoles are just like screens - you can use them to access the internet / other people and I don’t believe any child under 16 has the ability to resist that temptation especially if the console is in their rooms.

So nobody under 16 should have access to the internet?

Although as OP's son's birthday was three years ago it's a bit late to give advice.

🧟‍♂️

I'm a firm believer that regular gaming is good for most kids, but yes, some kids (and their parents) do seem to struggle to regulate it. Absolutely important to pick the right games though (I'd say, story-based, creative or puzzle/adventure games are a lot more likely to be positive than competitive ones like Fortnite, FIFA or whatever else).

You are 100 percent right! Kids don't need this electronic crap. There are so many more inventive and interesting ways they can spend their time!

Zombie thread, fgs.

The kid will be 12 now...