To feel the doggy-as-child thing goes too far

[Lovelyideas]

I like dogs. I got my parents a dog and she changed their lives. But something seems wrong about dog stuff in our little town. The whole child-substitute thing just goes too far. It is as if all the pressures of child rearing are transported on to dogs.

Example 1 today. I bump into friend K with her cute new puppy. A stranger's puppy interacts with K's puppy. K and stranger exchange friendly doggy chitchat. K's puppy is straining at the lead and they have this dialogue.
Stranger: oh! Yours wants to come off the lead!
K well, I wouldn't trust her yet.
Stranger: oh, what you can do is, take her to the park, you know the enclosed children's playground before the kids get there, it's so good for her training!
K oh right....
Stranger: or the tennis courts, she can have a great time on the tennis courts and she can't get out.
K right, thanks...

This is not an isolated thing, I have noticed it for a while. I am sure that my parents -yes- trained their dog. But then she became part of the scenery, not the big focus of conversation. There were no dog play dates, dog cages or dog anxiety. They did not allow their untrained dog in areas where dogs are not allowed for very good reason. And she was none the worse for it.

if you baby your dog, see it as a family member then you start to feel as if the dog is a kind of simplified version of a human, therefore in your mind it has a right to happiness and self actualization in the same way that a human does

dogs are living toys created by humans for their own amusement

I have 2 dogs and I can't disagree with what shining says!

I think the Spanish word for pet is "mascota" - very close to the English "mascot" and I think a fair reflection of what pets are to lots of people, me included if I'm honest (Not All Pet Owners etc etc).

Genuine question shining - do you know of any good sources to start reading about the psychology of pet ownership? It's interesting.

I do know what the OP means though. Years ago I worked with a woman who had no children, before I had them too. She was great, but when someone told a story about their son or daughter she would come back with one about how her cat had done 'the same thing', like they were on a par in terms of behaviour/the nature of the story. Something about it always made me cringe. People are even worse about their dogs, and I say that as a total dog person. No it really isn't the sodding same!

Genuine question shining - do you know of any good sources to start reading about the psychology of pet ownership? It's interesting
sorry no I dont know of any
I do like dogs in general, but I dont want to have to be nervous of large powerful creatues when I'm out and about!

I know it's all about the owners
I think in many ways the dogs in an emissary to it's owner, so anti social people give rise to anti social dogs, the dog just becomes a channel for the bile of it's owner.

I think that in many ways dogs are very tuned into humans and can read their emotions, it seems likely that in some ways the dogs mind could be seen as a sort of simplified version of a humans mind, thats why dogs are able to slot into our lives so effectively, they can map themselves onto us and vice versa

I've approached an enclosed children's play area (WITH a no dogs sign!) with DD4 and from a distance seen a dog running about in it with it's owner and so walked away again.

Just because you can't see any kids playing in there it doesn't mean
a) you aren't breaking the rules of the park which are there for some very good reasons,
and b) you aren't harming anyone.

I'd say that goes for tennis courts too.

"I've approached an enclosed children's play area (WITH a no dogs sign!) with DD4 and from a distance seen a dog running about in it with it's owner and so walked away again."

QED?

I suspect that people who think their dogs are entitled to do things like that are also like that in other areas of their life, the same people who turn up to child free weddings with their child or to parties with a sibling without ever asking if it would be OK.

Basically people who think rules don't apply to them.

Absolute nail on head, tabulahrasa.

I love my dog with all my heart but he has never been on a tennis court (he's not that talented!). In fact locally the tennis courts have had the gates removed in order to stop people exercising dogs with poor recall there; people just ignored notices and were apparently not cleaning up after their dogs. Actually just as bad are people who take their kids to ride their bikes at the tennis courts. Ds was flabbergasted when he was playing tennis with a friend and a woman breezed in with a scootering posse and asked ds and friend to stop playing as her dcs wanted to scoot round the perimeter. Ds, being a super-awkward teen, sloped off the court, too to say anything.

lol at "with a scootering posse"

you can just imagine it (sadly!)