To think pamper parties for small girls are a bit sad?

[Throughautomaticdoors]

My friend's dd with be 7 in December and is having a pamper party when they each get their hair and make up done and have a mini manicure or pedicure.
On one hand I guess it's no different to dressing up but on the other it sort of seems worse because it's so focused on appearance. It's the beginning of the trout pout and selfies. At 7 I'd have had no idea about getting my make up done. I know it's just how things are now and a lot of the little girls are the same but they are pretty without makeup on aren't they? It's sad that already they feel they have to look different.

I think even if if was just nails and hair it doesn't seem so sad, but make up seems really unnecessary.

Aibu?

An old fiend told me her daughter had one last of these last week age 7. They had the whole salon and all the girls from her class from small prep school went. All in special party dresses and had hair, make up, nails etc the works. Took all afternoon apparently.
All I could think was how sad that was as I looked at my two DC ( DD & DS) covered in mud from their days outdoor activities...
Let them be 7 not trying to be 17

DD 7, has been to lots of parties this year, but fortunately none of her mates have had a pamper one. So I have not had to pretend I think they're marvelous. (I think they're grim.)

It's naff beyond belief.

There was a thread about what makeup girls "need" at 12, and even that made me go why would a girl who is not even a teenager "need" any make up.

7 yo is far too early.

i agree, far too young, but OTOH I do recall my pretty tomboyish dds really once enjoying being made up and having their hair 'done' by a couple of older girls when on holiday. Dds would have been about 5 and 8, the older girls about 13 and 14.

I hate the word 'pampering', and to me in any case it wouldn't have anything to do with being massaged, prettified or otherwise mauled about, which I hate. To me it would mean e.g. lying on the sofa reading a book or watching TV, while someone else brings me cups of tea, cooks the dinner, does the washing, irons it, does the food shopping, changes the beds, etc.

I think that that kind of "party" is a bad idea in general, period. Could never understand why adult women do it. Putting on make up and nail polish is not my idea of fun. (Except if the makeup is to make me look like something not human. Then it might be)

I also find the name misleading "pamper" implies it is about the girls, while in fact, it is about the male gaze.

@GETTING: Exactly.

@Lunar1: That's because, deep down, they know that football is fun, while being prettified is ... not. So the boys didn't really miss out on anything fun, but the girls did.
Now, if only they would admit that to themselves and organize something fun for the girls.

" You're an ornament darling " is all I hear

I would say YANBU except that 6year old DS asked if we could have a day over half term where we put mud on our faces and cucumbers on our eyes. So we did.

I don't like the idea of pamper parties however my youngest dd wants one for her 5th birthday. We are going to concede slightly and have a glitter and sparkle party so they will have peel able nail varnish, hair with glitter, sparkly/glittering tattoos, fairy wings and wands.

You might want to run that hair with glitter idea round her friends parents first Mad ...

YANBU

It's glitter hair spray already prewarned parents. I wanted to gauge their views before inviting their dds as I would hate one of her friends to not be able to come as the parents felt uncomfortable.

Felt uncomfortable cleaning glitter off everything for the next month or two ? ;)

I don't really have any feelings either way. DD went to one. They got their hair done in braids, feet in the foot spa, bit of lipgloss and nails painted then had a dance. They seemed to enjoy it.

I think it's all about balance. I wouldn't have a problem with my child going to one because I'm sure that they'd get to experience lots of other types of parties! My parents were very restrictive when I was a child and I now do mobile hair and beauty. It's not the worst thing if girl/boy likes hair and make up!

My DD went to one at about that age and although she quite enjoyed having her nails done, she was deeply uncomfortable with the results of having lipstick etc applied - having her face changed to something which she was supposed to think pretty, but did not, was not a good experience for her.

Yeah I get how bad it looks if you over think it but to be honest my 5 year old would bite off my hand for a party like this!!! I don't think I could do anything like it until late at least 7 or 8 but not for lack of her asking lol

A bit sad? YABU. They are really fucking sad.

YANBU, I am extremely grateful that DD (10) has never been invited to one, she isn't in the least bit interested in this stuff yet and much prefers going to the trampoline park or similar.

I have never been to one either, staying in doing each others nails or similar holds no appeal for me whatsoever, but I'm not one for "pampering" full stop.

Yanbu DD went to one when she was 5 (in retrospect not sure why I agreed to it) when given slices of cucumber to put on her eyes looked really confused and eat them instead.
She had a pirate themed party for her 5th birthday and went dressed as Captain Hook Though the amount of texts I got 'checking' if it was a pirate and princess party left me a bit

YANBU I can't understand parents that encourage their girls to be obsessed with their appearance. It is sad!

How the holy hell do these parents get 5-7 year olds to keep still long enough to apply makeup and nail polish. DD is now almost 14, at that age she would not have been able to to stay still that long. Parties for primary age kids used to be all ball pits and bowling. Anything to burn off bags of energy.

I would personally be concerned if a 7 yr old couldn't sit still for 2 mins to have some glittery nail varnish put on!
It's not for everyone but the vast majority of girls this age like having nail polish on and some glitter smeared on their cheeks ime. Unless they are giving the kids a brow wax, contouring make-up and a set of acrylics I think the outrage on here is a bit sad tbh.

My daughter ask for one for her sixth birthday and I was not keen but am so glad I let her in the end. We found a salon that Was respectful of the girls ages and didn't cake them in makeup but to see her feeling happy and confident and strutting like a peacock was priceless. I tell her she's beautiful every day and encourage her to be happy in her own skin but for a special occasion this was a wonderful experience.

I remember having Tinkerbell make up when I was 5. My mum also put make up on us for our school discos and crimped our hairs. We loved dressing up and I would have loved a party like that when I was little. Thirty years on, I don't believe I lost my childhood from being exposed to skincare and make up. Wearing blusher and velvet hot pants ala Kylie (my idol at 6) did not stop me collecting trains and loving lego, or going to football matches with my Dad. I was allowed to make my mind up on what I loved. There are plenty of things my children like, that I don't get, but then their interests are their own, not mine.

I don't see anything wrong with it. Some girls like dressing up/putting on nail varnish - my DD does and she's just shy of 2!

I'd have no objections to her attending/hosting a Pamper Party if she wanted!