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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel uncomfortable with this stand up to cancer a thon

75 replies

PlayOnWurtz · 21/10/2016 23:21

It's just gay men perving over pretty men isn't it. Imagine if women were asked to strip or were told people would be queuing to see them because they were good looking.

I get what they're trying to do but feel how they're going about it isn't right

OP posts:

CoolCarrie · 22/10/2016 00:06

Sorry about your mum. Take care of yourself pp

passthewineplz · 22/10/2016 00:07

I'm finding this campaign a refreshing change!

I don't usually comment about the various cancer campaigns, such as cancer research and similar charities with their 'cancer we're coming to get you' and 'brave the shave' campaigns as they really piss me off with their disrespectful slogans.

(Losing your hair is actually painful, and a constant reminder that you're ill. It's nothing like shaving off your hair. That campaign in particular makes me feel un easy).

Yes I get the charities are about raising awareness about cancer, however having had treatment for 'c' myself, I feel that the 'stand up to cancer campaign' is far more effective, positive and thought provoking in comparison to other UK charities.

So guys, yes its emotional it's suppose to be! And if you're not watching, switch your tv's over and donate a tenner!

GabsAlot · 22/10/2016 00:07

oh ffs dont watch it then

Happyhippy45 · 22/10/2016 00:08

This was the most uncomfortable I had felt watching stand up to cancer. I didn't watch all of it. DH had remote and we flicked in and out.
Davina with the giant testicles.....then the prostrate exam.......I found it all a bit crass. I'm not a prude by any means, it just felt cheap. Going to any lengths to get money.
I have lost people to cancer......this didn't sit well with me.

PoppyPicklesPenguin · 22/10/2016 00:08

I am so sorry for your loss nick it's must be so difficult

I've lost two grandmothers, two grandfathers and my mother is a survivor of cancer.
My SIL mum died in her 40's
My DP's best friend died at the tender age of 9.
My DP's mother is now fighting cancer

I know it is so difficult, I know it must seem like it's making light of it, but they are not.

They are saying please donate and so many people haven't experienced it first hand and if this raises money and someone in ten years time walks out of a hospital alive then I don't care if someone laughed at a man taking his top off I really don't.

Nicknacky · 22/10/2016 00:10

Thanks for the kind words everyone, I wasn't meaning to look for sympathy. But let's not pretend, everyone knows about cancer and the impact it has. I would rather people routinely donated rather than it being so in your face as it has been lately. But that's because of how I feel right now.

Although I can safely say my local hospice will get not a penny more from me even though I always previously donated. My mums care was appalling but that's another story!

APlaceOnTheCouch · 22/10/2016 00:11

I lost my DF to cancer and there were points tonight (during the personal stories) where I had to stop watching because it brought back certain memories.
But I think it's a great way to raise awareness as well as funds.

WorraLiberty · 22/10/2016 00:12

Considering more than 1 in 20 cancers in the UK are linked to being overweight or obese, of course they're going to mention it.

Steroids can be part of the treatment.

Obesity can be part of the cause in the first place.

They're hardly going to tell cancer sufferers to refuse steroids in case they gain weight, while undergoing closely supervised medical treatment.

BIWI · 22/10/2016 00:13

Davina with the giant testicles.....then the prostrate exam.......I found it all a bit crass. I'm not a prude by any means, it just felt cheap. Going to any lengths to get money.

Did you actually listen to any of this? It was all about describing potential cancer symptoms. And it was designed to be talked about in simple terms, so that people would know what to expect if they went to the doctor/hospital, and were going to be examined.

Why on earth would you think this was cheap? And what's the issue about raising money for a cancer charity?

APlaceOnTheCouch · 22/10/2016 00:14

nicknacky I am so sorry for your loss

Happyhippy45 · 22/10/2016 00:18

BIWI I'm sure there are other ways to approach this subject other than lowering a giant set of "balls" for Davina to prod and a prosthetic arse for her to stick her finger up. My FIL died from prostrate cancer. His son/my husband was upset by this segment. Reducing the reality of physical exams to entertainment to raise money. Just didn't sit right with me

BIWI · 22/10/2016 00:19

I'm sorry they were upset. But if it helps other people to seek treatment, then surely it's worth it?

And frankly, making something like this entertainment is exactly what does raise money. I can't see what the problem is with that.

MumOnTheRunCatchingUp · 22/10/2016 00:20

I also get why they mention obesity too!! It's a huge problem, would you prefer it swept under the carpet?

Most people realise that there's difference between obesity and weight gain during treatment!

passthewineplz · 22/10/2016 00:22

The section with the testes and prostate are about raising awareness. Evidence shows that men are less likely to visit their GP when they are feeling unwell, or experiencing medical issues.

Prostate cancer is one of the 20 top cancers found in men.

Happyhippy45 · 22/10/2016 00:22

BWIW....Yeah I can't put my finger on what's wrong with this for me.....just feels crude. Good they are raising money though. We'll just suck it up.

APlaceOnTheCouch · 22/10/2016 00:23

I'm sorry your DH was upset by it but those segments weren't supposed to be entertainment. They were supposed to educate and demystify the process. Perhaps you missed some of the introductions because you were switching in and out.

WorraLiberty · 22/10/2016 00:25

I think humour can be more divisive than religion sometimes.

What makes one person laugh, offends or bores the arse off another person.

They can't please all of the people all of the time.

That's why it's best to start recording an hour before you start watching, so you can skip the bits that you don't find funny, but other people do.

This kind of thread comes up every time Comic Relief is on.

The most important thing is money and awareness gets raised and as a bonus, most people enjoy the night's entertainment, even if not all of it is to their exact taste.

ToujeoQueen · 22/10/2016 00:29

Cancer is a bastard. As long as the message gets through to check breasts or testicles (think giant testicles was aimed at younger men?) then that's the main aim.

JellyBelli · 22/10/2016 00:29

I wont donate. Its not just I cant afford to, its that cancer research was given uinlimited funding by the Nixon govt at the beginning of the 70's. Decades and billions of dollars later they stopped unlimited funding because they hadnt got anywhere with it.
It doesnt matter how much money you throw at cancer research, there will never be 'a cure for cancer'.

BIWI · 22/10/2016 00:30

Almost £16m raised. Worth pissing off a few people, I think, if it helps to deal with bastarding cancer.

HelenaDove · 22/10/2016 00:31

Im not asking them to tell patients not to take steroids in case they gain weight.
But its bloody unfair to have certain ignorant members of the general public to see an overweight cancer patient in the street and have them assume the weight was contributory to the cancer when in many cases it was the treatment that caused the weight gain. One of the short films about a cancer patient that Ch4 has done for this campaign covers this.

My husbands aunt had MS. when she was older steroids were part of the treatment for that. She was born in the 1930s and had a figure like Audrey Hepburns. Until she had to go on steroids towards the end of her life because it was part of the treatment. Because she was ill. Its not a small weight gain on these treatments . I get that obesity can be a cause. But every time there is a press release on obesity there is never a caveat that reminds ppl that ppl on certain treatments are overweight through NO FAULT OF THEIR OWN.This is unfair to ppl undergoing treatment.

Nicknacky · 22/10/2016 00:36

I didn't even get so much as an information leaflet on how to care for my mum when she was dying with cancer. No visits from the nurses or hospice until I phoned them asking where the fuck they were and they only started coming in 4 weeks before she died.

I'm a police officer and haven't been at work for 7 weeks as I cared for my mum. Thankfully they have been far more supportive than the nhs.

But the day she passed away she received a information book from Marie Currie with all the information I had been shouting for. Too little too late. So where is the £16m being spent apart from research? Because it sure isn't improving the care in our area.

Local MP and our lawyer want us to complain about mums care. This is probably clouding my judgement tonight.

PoppyPicklesPenguin · 22/10/2016 00:36

Obesity was discussed at the same time as smoking as a possible cause.

Both can contribute towards cancer, it was saying individuals who smoke or who are obese through their OWN choices aren't helping themselves.

Yes some medical treatments can cause you put to on weight, but they were not discussing this - they were talking about diet and the fact many people can take steps to be healthier.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 22/10/2016 00:39

Avoiding the whole thing and selfishly hope they make loads 😐

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 22/10/2016 00:40

Nick- could not read and run . It's so so patchy - my dad died in ICU as the Hospice was full ! What to say - u am so sorry you got this shit care xxxx

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