wibu or was the manager of this restaurant?

[Itisraining]

Recently went to local restaurant which we go to regularly so know the manager who has a reputation for being a bit tricky. The whole group ordered from the lighter bite menu. I ordered a macaroni cheese with garlic bread (which I have never ordered before). When we came to pay, I noticed I had been charged for the large portion from the main menu(£6.50 more expensive)
When I questioned it,
the manager said, "you didn't say you wanted the small one"
I said "I didn't say I wanted the larger one either and the other one says it comes with garlic ciabatta and I said the one with garlic bread"
Him, " they are both garlic bread, madame and you didn't say which one you wanted, did you not notice that it was the larger one?"
Me, (staying very polite) "No, I have never ordered it before and why did you assume, I wanted the big one when we all ordered from the lighter bite menu?"
You, "you are an adult"
Me, "But surely if there are 2 sizes, it is up to you to ascertain which one?"
Him, getting very exasperated and irritated, "you need to see this from my point of view, oh forget it, i'll charge for the smaller one, I can't be bothered to argue" He strops off.
Left feeling quite troubled. This is somewhere we give a lot of custom to. I now feel awkward about going back.

Was I wrong to question the order? For me it was clear that the one I ordered was the small one with garlic bread NOT the one which was labelled with ciabatta.

unless the restaurant requires every customer to read the whole menu before they order it's still up to them to clarify

This. It's lazy service, and why the fuck should OP pay for that.

The manager sounds like a complete dick. Imagine arguing with a regular customer over that.

Take your business elsewhere, OP.

If there is any scope for confusion then it is down to the servers to clarify, and if they dont then either they are being lazy (rare ime, they want good tips) or they have been trained badly, which is down to the manager.

I cant help thinking that if he is this much of a dick to customers then he must be a total cunt to the staff.

I've done loads of waitressing in my time and I would have been mortified about this because I should have clarified which option given there was a choice. There is also the possibility (depending on how the orders are sent to the kitchen) that the OP was actually given the small serving at the time and the manager made a mistake when he was putting ringing up the order.

Slightly at the posters who could make mac & cheese for pennies (missing point of post). It is our family favourite Sunday dinner and would cost at least £4 to make for 4. 300g of good quality cheddar, pasta, whole milk, cream all adds up. Not to mention the sundries like flour, mustard, butter and a salad and some garlic bread.

YANBU op. If a restaurant has written a menu with more than one version of something then the emphasis is on them to clarify, because they are the ones who should know where the confusion may apply. Service in the UK is so shoddy it doesn't surprise me though.

Good grief, I hope the people who think op is being unreasonable never open restaurants or go into the trade, they sound like prison guards in some despotic state. "You should have known by psychic means when the meal arrived what the portion size should be," "it is your job to read the entire menu".The manager clearly doesn't know anything about good service or sounds like he enjoys his job and has not interest in encouraging repeat custom. In case I'm not clear op, you are not being unreasonable. When I read your post I thought all replies would be on your side!

In case wasn't clear (given there are two options ), YANBU

Some of the responses on here are completely uncalled for and are better suited to a school playground than a forum for adults, parents no less. I despair....who the fuck do people think they are judging the OPs use of language, choice of diet and as for Linda.

How about a nice supportive environment rather than pathetic point scoring, feeling superior because "oh I'd never eat macaroni cheese for lunch". The OP asked a non offensive question so not sure why she got the nasty comments she got.

^ Starry, yeah - that too. Petty, pathetic bullying.

I think this has been an interesting thread with a pretty even spread of yabus and yanbus. I haven't seen any bullying or playground like behaviour at all (apart from one unpleasant comment from Linda) and I am sick to the fucking back teeth of over sensitive types who cannot differentiate between disagreeing and being "unsupportive". Why does op need support in this instance? It is not a big deal that she had a disagreement with another adult. If Mumsnet becomes a place where the only acceptable comment is "you are so completely right hun" then it will die. It is macaroni cheese, not mac n cheese, ciabatta is bread, pasta and bread is really not a light meal, £13.50 for main course macaroni cheese in an average restaurant is at least £4.50 too much.

Sorry, forgot to say Yanbu op! I'd be tempted to stop going to that restaurant - manager sounds like an arse.

They should have checked I guess but because the large one was from the main menu I would expect you to flag if you wanted the non-standard size.

If everyone else has ordered panini etc (a light lunch) then I would assume the person taking the order would check which menu the OP was ordering from.

Only if she knows there is a standard and a small size
Any competent waitstaff should check, since there are 2 sizes of the same dish and most customers won't memorise both menu

It's up to you to state which size you want, and it's up to them to make sure they know for sure which you want. YWBothU.

bibbity you're right OP doesn't need support in this instance - I was talking more generally about the forum.

I don't think it's about being oversensitive, people don't have to agree with each other. I just think it's a sad state of affairs when rather than answer the question at hand some people feel the need to comment on the OPs choice of meal.... Which is irrelevant to the question really. Just can't understand why anyone would feel the need to comment "carbs and fat with carbs and fat" and similar comments unless it's a) an unasked for judgement of OPs diet b) an attempt to show her up for her food choices c) an attempt to make themselves feel superior.

It's not about being oversensitive, it may have come across like that at 2am when I posted. I am more frustrated that in a world full of judgement of women and what they do (I may have been emotionally charged having just read some of comments about the victim in Ched Evans case) women can't even order a macaroni cheese for lunch and ask a question on a parenting forum about it without some smart arse feeling the need to comment on her choice of lunch when that wasn't the question in hand.

And please don't insult me to think I would use the phrase "you're so right hun". I wouldn't and haven't. Also at no point have I said people should agree with the OP- that's not what my first post was about. In fact I don't believe I've said whether I think the OP was reasonable or not.

I can see this from both perspectives.

My husband is manager of a restaurant and head chef and they get this a lot. Once an adult ordered a meal - say for example fish and chips - and received that, but when it was time to pay the bill he said that he had ordered a child's meal, not an adults meal and was refusing to pay for the meal he had eaten all of. This also happens with people who order a full meal and don't eat it all but enjoy it, don't ask for a box to put the food in and take home, then only want to pay for what they've actually eaten. You'd be surprised just what people try to get out of paying for things fully, so to that manager you probably aren't the first person that week - or indeed that evening - who has tried to do something like that, even if in your mind you were sincerely surprised that you were being charged for a different meal to what you thought you ordered.

I can appreciate it from your perspective also - the waiter / waitress should have checked if you were ordering the large or small.

BUT, did you not notice that the portion was smaller (it -must- have been noticeably smaller to warrant such a difference in price. You said you haven't had the macaroni cheese before but surely looking at everyone else's plates yours would have stood out as much bigger?) and also that it didn't come with the garlic bread you expected? If it were me when the meal was put down in front of me I would have clarified what I had ordered and expected to receive just to save confusion at bill time.

I think for the reasons above you were being slightly unreasonable but I think that manager should have been graceful irrespective of how irritated he was with the conversation. If it was a larger table he could have offered you the difference as a discount as a gesture of goodwill (as no doubt drinks, food and anything else would have paid well) and made a mental note to keep an eye out for your orders in future just in case you are one of the many who tries it on a lot, but I guess everyone has bad days, maybe this was one of his? - No excuse but we're all human.

So what you're saying Starry is that its ok for you to go off on a tangent and make comments that aren't directly relevant to the op, but not for other people to do so? Saying carbs + carbs does not constitute a light bite is a judgement on the restaurant menu, not on the op (if it is a judgement at all). I would expect op to come back with "yeah, macaroni cheese and
garlic bread, yummmm" not feel upset by it. How you get from Ched Evans to reading playground-like behaviour into this thread is quite an exercise!

bibbity except one post says "why would anyone want macaroni and cheese with bread" which is judgement on the Op as well as perhaps as the menu.

I was only referencing CE to explain that I may have been reading through an emotional lens as well as tiredness at almost at 2am and accept I may have come across as sensitive.

Again, you're putting words in my mouth...I didn't say posters couldn't go off on a tangent anymore than I said everyone had to agree with the OP. I was commenting on the albeit few posts where I felt there was judgement of the OP...my issue was with this not that it was a tangent. I just said they were irrelevant to highlight the point the comments weren't necessary.

Anyway we re not going to agree so we ll just have to agree to disagree.

Lottiel
people who order a full meal and don't eat it all but enjoy it, don't ask for a box to put the food in and take home, then only want to pay for what they've actually eaten

WHAT?!

That's like getting a tin of paint from B&Q, doing your windowsills and taking the rest back for a refund! (Makes mental note to try this on new time we decorate)

I think it is a judgement on the restaurant for offering it so ner ner ner ner (an example of playground behaviour for you there).

If I were to say "why would you want jam on your toast when marmite is available?" would that be a judgement on your toast topping choices or a comment about mine?

I bet he's really pleased to see such a big group in his restaurant all ordering from the cheapskate light bites menu. Methinks he was possibly making a point, especially if you go there quite often.

2kids2dogsnosense

Honestly, you'd be surprised what people try to get out of paying for meals.

We've had:

"There's a bit of plastic in my food - look!" and have been presented with blue plastic shards, which we know aren't ours because we have only yellow plastic containers in the kitchen.

Eating the entire meal, presenting an empty plate scraped of gravy / sauce to then tell the waitress it was undercooked / not nice / not to tastes / bad and refuse to pay. Cue a massive scene of shouting customer / young flustered waiter / waitress who has been advised to hold firm, awkwardness, then other people being called off particular duties (husband out of kitchen for example) to sort the situation out. Ridiculous.

People ordering a steak, saying it's not done to their tastes but want to keep the 'undercooked / overcooked' steak and have another too. On one occasion a couple only ordered one meal, then tried that. The wife watched on expectantly, I can only assume the free second steak was her meal.

"I ordered a child's meal", "I ordered from OAP menu." (Not an OAP, not on the right day), "I ordered meal deal." (We don't do meal deals), "Menu prices are wrong, I expected £X." Menu presented, menu price correct to bill, refuse to pay for their confusion because they wouldn't have ordered had they known (in their own mind) the price - which they had misunderstood. "We ordered ten meals!! We would have expected a discount for the amount we've ordered!" - Why? You all ate, why should you not pay for everything you've eaten / drank just because you are a large table?

Only a few examples I can think off the top of my head - and honestly these are the last month or so, and my husband definitely doesn't tell me about all of them as it winds me up on his behalf. Not that I'm suggesting in any way this is what the OP is doing but somehow some strange people assume that going to a restaurant to eat guarantees them something for nothing.

I never used 'said' in that way.

I know that Itsraining. It just annoys me. And people who say 'some' instead of 'about' as in 'some 100 people'. Oh and 'purchase' instead of buy. I don't think you used that either but in case you ever do, you know my thoughts on it. Ascertain is from the same lexicon of poncery.