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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To pay for DCS Men B vaccine from their savings?

78 replies

Afo · 15/10/2016 00:25

My first AIBU. On maternity leave with DC3 at present so money is tighter than usual. We've cut back on spending but I do save £50/month each for the 2 older DC. I have booked for them to have the Meningitis B vaccine during the week, having been on the waiting list for a number of months. I just don't have the spare cash at present (£400). I was telling my Ddad today that we were going to get them and he asked the cost, and in passing told him I had to go to bank in person first to withdraw the funds from the DCS accounts. He made it clear he thought I was BU for going ahead with the jabs when we couldn't pay for them out of our own pocket and that at their ages (5 and 2) they wouldn't be at that much risk and that I was mad for dipping into their savings this way!! I was a bit put out tbh but said nothing but of course I've been feeling guilty all evening. I didnt have plans to put the money back btw.

OP posts:
DesignedForLife · 15/10/2016 06:57

I just don't know why you'd give it at that age. It's relatively new on the child immunisation list so plenty of babies/children have coped without it (including my own)

What a dumb argument. Millions of people lived and survived before any vaccinations were about, but millions didn't.

The peak ages for men B are under 5 and 12-18. Yes most cases are under 6 months. However go to Meningitis Now or Meningitis Research Foundation websites are read the experiences there, anyone of any age can catch Men B or the other strains of Meningitis. It hasn't been rolled out to older kids purely because the NHS can't afford it, which is a terrible shame.

My brother died from Men B aged 16. Fat lot of good his savings account did him. My parents used it to pay for the funeral. £200 is nothing.

Get the vaccine, who cares what anyone else thinks. We paid for DD to have it as she missed out by a couple of months. Check out your local Boots, they seem to be cheaper than most other places.

ItsLikeRainOnYourWeddingDay · 15/10/2016 07:03

Do it. You have plenty time to put the money back in. If your kids caught it and you didn't vaccinate the guilt would kill you.

funnyperson · 15/10/2016 07:05

It should be available free on the nhs.

honkinghaddock · 15/10/2016 07:08

Peanut - your post is awful. Just think about what you have written.
OP - nothing wrong in using the money for this.

deathandtaxes123 · 15/10/2016 07:14

The money is intended For your DC and getting them a vaccine is spending it on them so....YANBU in the slightest

MoonStar07 · 15/10/2016 07:23

Totally use their savings. This is the sort of thing it should be used for. PS I have DC a similar age. We went to Superdrug at £95 a dose Boots is the same £95 a dose

HaPPy8 · 15/10/2016 07:45

Do it OP. Nothing is more important than their health.

missyB1 · 15/10/2016 07:52

Do it, did what anyone else thinks! We paid for ds (age 7) at the beginning of the year, some friends were very patronising and told us we were wasting our money, I told them that I hadn't asked for their opinion.

Original poster
Afo · 15/10/2016 08:23

User I'm on maternity leave on smp. We can afford a 3rd child and save for all 3!!! It's just a temporary reduction in our outgoings, but with trying to finish a new build house and changing cars to fit the 3rd DC our own savings were depleted. I guess £200 out of each of their accounts over a lifetime of saving isn't a huge amount anyhow. Thanks for all the opinions it's eased my consience!

OP posts:
RomanticWalksToTheFridge · 15/10/2016 08:29

In your position as you have described it I would do EXACTLY the same.

Original poster
Afo · 15/10/2016 08:31

*a temporary reduction in our income. When I 1st put them on the list we could have afforded it, but I don't want to put it off and put them to the back of the list.

OP posts:
HattiesBackpack · 15/10/2016 08:36

YANBU!
This is what me and DH would do, we have savings accounts for the kids much like your set up, and would think nothing of dipping in to pay for vaccines.

(FWIW My DH is a paramedic and he always supports vaccinations)

PeppermintInfusion · 15/10/2016 08:41

I did exactly the same for DS and had a similar reaction from my DM...
Since we had our him on the waiting list we had a number of unexpected expenses, including an unexpected hike in nursery fees, not to mention we are still recovering from the financial hit of only getting maternity allowance last year. The space on the list came up much sooner than we'd originally been told. We paid for one ourselves and took one from his savings.
His savings account is where I put birthday/Christmas/etc money, the periodic emptying of the money box and we usually put something in there ourselves each month. He will definitely have a tiny nest egg from it when he's older, but realistically what else is it for apart from things like this. I've used it for a few other big purchases for him too.

So no, YANBU!

Nzou1050 · 15/10/2016 09:07

peanutandphoenix she can afford it using the money she has put in the savings accounts.

Oly5 · 15/10/2016 09:11

I got the vaccines for my kids. I would have eaten beans on toast for months to pay for them.
I have first hand experience of the devastation meningitis causes. It's not just the risk of death but the horrific disabilities endured by survivors.
Yes, your kids are past the peak age but there's another peak when they hit their teens. Don't worry about it OP. Your kids don't need that cash right now. Who knows what financial situation you'll be in when they're 18? Maybe much better off and £400 will seem minuscule. Go for it

SheldonCRules · 15/10/2016 09:19

I never get why people save for children then dip into it for things they want, pointless really as it's either the children's money so shouldn't be taken or it's adults saving and disguised as children's to take advantage of the tax free account.

I agree with the vaccine, I don't agree with taking somebody else's money to pay for it as you can't actually afford the purchase.

SuburbanRhonda · 15/10/2016 09:19

Ours had half theirs as Xmas pressies

Please tell me this is a joke.

TeenAndTween · 15/10/2016 09:21

Personally I wouldn't have accounts in the child's name.

Have a separate savings account which in your mind is designated for the children. But keep it as yours to spend as you feel best.
Have accounts in children's names only for presents from other family.

Bad idea to have money in child's name that they can blow when they turn 18. You have no idea how sensible they will be at that time.

vintagesewingmachine · 15/10/2016 09:22

Driving lessons versus immunity from this awful disease. Peanut- what a bloody ridiculous, fatuous comment.
OP- using that money for the vaccine is helping protect their future health and you have nothing to feel guilty about. Go for it.

HungryHorace · 15/10/2016 09:23

We've put it on our 0% til July 2019 credit card for our two, because for my own peace of mind I need them to have it. I'll have paid it off before interest falls due.

Do it, OP, think nothing more of it.

Bagina · 15/10/2016 09:25

SuburbanRhonda
Please tell me this is a joke
How rude! At ages 2 and 3, with mountains of plastic tat, yes a few family members gave them a small present to the value of a tenner, and gave the cash to us to get their jabs. (They usually spend about £50 on each) Seemed sensible! They still had ridiculous amounts of presents overall. And the gift of life Grin

PaperdollCartoon · 15/10/2016 09:25

I'm a bit confused (sorry I don't have kids)

Is MenB a new vaccine now being given to babies as standard, that wasn't available when your children were babies, so you want to get it done privately now?

Agree it's your money to use for them, go ahead and use it.

somekindofmother · 15/10/2016 09:33

you definitely are doing the right thing. we save monthly for ours, plus xmas and birthday money, and i've dipped in to buy a new car seat as the safest one was out of budget at the time, the was i see it is i'm using the money to ensure their long term health, safety and wellbeing, which ranks a million miles above fucking driving lessons. mine are 1 & 4 and didn't qualify... i should look into it actually, try and get them done.

dinosaursarebisexual · 15/10/2016 09:38

It's your money earmarked for your kids and your dad is BU. We got the vaccination for ours too.