If you are minted....

[FeralBeryl]

*What is your/ partner's career or job?
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Not a TAAT more a TIBAT (inspired by a thread)

Someone has a monthly take home pay of £11k
Not going to lie, I fully intend to suddenly obtain the necessary qualifications overnight for whatever it is. sure there'll be an online course....

I know there will have been a great deal of sacrifice, no work home balance etc. I'm not wanting to judge at all-I'm enthralled

Please.

If they are paying the same amount of tax as employees they should get a new accountant!

I didn't say they paid the same amount, I said they pay at the same rate .

It depends on oyur expenses. I don't really have many so my oposition despite being self employed is similar to employees as is the case for many self employed people. Yes if you have expenses which are wholly and exclusively connected tio work you can deduct them eg I have work insurance but that does not make me pay less take. It just means I pay tax on my net income just as the employees do. In fact fewer people in the UK pay as much income tax as the self employed equity partners in law firms and accountancy practices.

I love this thread, it's fascinating. I would love to know what those who earn highly from their own businesses, do.

These thread can be quite annoying and upsetting for some people though too. I've been on similar ones in the past.

I am a lawyer. My process to getting here were cycle to the library as a teenager to borrow a book "What people earn" (no internet to look it up in those day). Passed all the exams, best results in the school, top of year at univesity (i.e. I graduated , a teetodal virgin aged 20, in law - not everyone is prepared to make those sacrifices....) Came to London as the higher paid jobs are tehre, chidlren's father had to sell his house, leave his job to follow my career - not all women marry feminist men prepared to do that,; instead they marry sexist pigs who think men earn and women scrub the house.

Then worked pretty hard (2 weeks holiday for babies, back full time kind of hard) and then some judiciious moves between law firms, wrote 30 law books, did a lot of self promotion, public speaking 20 - 50 times a year which is very hard, sometimes up at 5am to go on things like R4, not easy trying to arrange baby sitting between 5am and 9am for example and that kind of stuff including business flights abroad when you have to fit that around breastfeeding.....

BUT and a huge but I love it and it's gone very well and I would change none of it nor the route to it but it's not for everyone and one reason law is quite well paid is most people cannot pass the exams and/or do not have what is needed to gain work from clients etc.

I thought here was a surplus of people who had law qualifications these days. It's hard work but there is an awful lot of nepotism within the law, it might not apply to you, but you would be disingenuous to day that it wasn't so.

*Me2017
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Wow... the pressure must be off these days what with Tony winding down on the Peace Envoy stuff and all that.

It's quite hard to qualify. Some people make it part way but cannot get a training contract. You can either ration places for the final course which used to be done to the number of lawyers needed or you can let everyone with a degree take the exams and have a go and then have a glut trying to do their final 2 years of qualification.

Actually in terms of being sponsored at law school for the fees etc law is much much better than many other jobs as the law firms pays all the costs if you are very good whereas in something like journalism you tend to have to do unpaid internships (which is then only possible if your family house or feed you). In law you even get paid say £500 a week for university holiday vacation schemes so it's pretty open to people of all types who have all those As and 2/1s from good places. I certainly wouldn't put anyone off law.

As clients often want to know % bloack, female etc firms have to publish statistics so if you have lal the A*s etc and are a minority I don't believe you would be disadvantaged - quite the converse.

I have a law degree and am not minted, but that's because I absolutely hated working as a solicitor in a big commercial firm where most people were just there to earn lots of money and so I left to do a minimum wage job doing something I enjoyed with people who I liked. I suspect that in order to make lots of money in any area, you either need to really want to be rich, or really enjoy what you do, and ideally both.

Husband is a high earner, he works in IT. He has experince as a senior technical project manager as well as program manager and director in very big companies. The key is contracting as it's a lot higher rate than permanent. The downside is you can be unemployed between contracts for several months but my husband is a saver, so never had that issue and was fantastic to have five months at home with him. He is now working in his own IT business. And is determined to become very wealthy.

Jasper, I agree. Every day I wake up and adore lore.I will spend some evenings just reading court transcripts from cases unrelated to what I do just for fun. I'm very lucky that I happened to find what I enjoy doing. If you love your work it's not a burden to do a lot of it and usually a lot of it is what makes the money in most jobs.

I agree with Babyl. I have made the most money since working for myself. I think that also makes you happier as you have control over your work and no boss (other than the client/customer).

I have three questions.

Thinking of investing in property development - flipping houses. Is there still money to be made?

I'd like to know for the ladies with a live in housekeeper. Are you paranoid about them going through your things? Do you keep them out of your bedroom? We plan on having a live in housekeeper for our next house move only because I want my beloved pets to be left at home with someone they know when we travel.

For the ladies with wealth. What are your friendships with other wealthy people like? And how is it with your non- wealthy friends?

Already, my husband and I have encountered lots of jealousy and trouble making quality friendships due to the money my husband earns. To make matters worse, my husband is very generous ( has a huge heart) and always wants to pay for dinner to treat friends knowing they cannot afford what we can. They are all aware my husband earns very good money and he drives a 100k car, other than that we are not flashy.

Despite the fact neither one of us are gossips or out to get anything from anybody and give lots of time and energy to people. It's very one sided. I'm just totally fed up. And no longer will be going out of my way for these people.

I feel like once I'm loaded, I will attract friends who won't be jealous as they will have their own money and success. Also they can afford to come out and do fun things.

And due to the bad experince, I think I would play down the amount of wealth we go on to accumulate when it comes to family and friends who aren't well off.

The main issue Babyl is you aren'tloaded. You are like the recipients of your husband's generosity at the dinners. So why not go out there and earn your own money like many women on mumsnet and then you might feel happier about it all?

On staff if you have someone in every day (and we have occasionally had live in although I am certainly not loaded) yes it's intrusive. teenagers come ou t of rooms and the cleaner / housekeeper is there (poor housekeeper). You just have to decide which you prefer - doing the work yourself or having someone in and for me currently someone coming in is bettter given I work full time than doing it myself but I would not like someone living in now. We have a faiirly large house so just tend to shut ourselves away when we are not alone at home.

The lady I have had for about 18 years does indeed go into my bedroom. II would recommend although I dont' have it having a confidentiality agreement signed particularly for live in staff. We have had it with nannies. Particularly if you have things to hide. For most people secret stuff is more likely to be on their pc and suppose if you think you'are at risk you can have regular security sweeps for key logging software. I suspect in practice it is more likely your spouse is puttingthat stuff on though than your housekeeper in most relationships of the wealthy!

I pay for a fair few meals as I earn reasonably large amounts compared to most people and I don't mind that at all and I have never been with anyone who hasn't offered to pay anyway. I am not materialistic so deliberately drive a car worht £2k and I think it's a lot safer to look not very well off actually and not splash cash around. If a burglar got in here he'd find nothing he'd want to steal as I am not into physical things like art and I don't even wear a ring!

Baby I think driving a £100k car is all the flashy you need!

I wouldn't say I'm minted. I gained a professional qualification,m started on 30k a year and became the service lead 8 year after qualifying. I'm on 95k now.

It's just me Son and I so we don't have too much living costs. I bought my house outright so no Mortgage but I pay a mortgage on another property, which is worth 400k. It's rented out at £2000 a month which more than covers the cost of mortgage.

My Son goes to private school which costs £20,000 a year but is the one luxury I would never not pay for. Having gone to private school myself I think it's very important.

Overall we have a disposable income of £8,000 a month.

Yes, I'm not loaded (yet), however we are considerably more well off than our friends.

Actually, I am starting a business as well as looking into property investment. And you are right, I have no doubt this will make me feel happier.

And sure, me working, will combat jealousy about me being able to afford to stay home. But the bottom line is, it won't stop the jealousy of having the lifestyle we can afford.

That's great advice about the PC. Thanks. I didn't think about that. I have nothing to hide. It's more them being in your bedroom.

To me having money is not about things either, it's about the freedom you have. And being able to have lots of great experinces.

Lol Stately. My car is an old bomb, so I try to balance it out lol.

Depending on what type of housekeeper you have, they will have to enter your room surely? You should define staff roles carefully and have confidentially agreements in place, no matter what roles they are doing.

In our houses nannies are free to enter bedrooms, as out the cleaners and housekeepers. Other house staff do not. If you don't trust someone (using a reputable agency and references), then you shouldn't employ them.

I'm perplexed by your other questions. It doesn't matter how much money you have, your friends are your friends surely? I am generous to mine but have always been, even when I had less materially. I'm not sure where you think you're going to find new 'loaded' friends just because you've made money? That is a little gauche, putting it kindly.

My point is they are jealous. It has nothing to do with us being more generous and then not being able to be generous back. It's because of that jealousy that they become more like acquaintances due to their issues with us. The ones I do get close to eventually become flakey. It's very hard for a person who has issues with you to ever want to be a close friend. Therefore we don't get to develop best friends with people due to their insecurities/ issues with money.

Hence if they are already successful, they have no reason to be jealous of us for that reason.

Well , we are moving soon to a completely different area. To be blunt a more affluential area. My husband will of course be getting to know very successful people through his business as he only deals with the major players. So that won't be the issue.

Hopefully that is more clear now. And we can move away from me and someone can share their experince with friendships and do you still find jealousy issues?

Btw, property window, excuse my ignorance but why do you need cleaners if you have a housekeeper? I'm confused...

Lady,

A very good friend of my wife married a wealthy man -

She kept her friends as her attitude is, I am not rich, I just married a rich man.

Nothing worse than someone who acts the big I am when its their partner who has all the money

I'm still slightly bemused by your assertions regarding moving on friend wise so I won't continue on that.

As I said, it depends on what type of housekeeper you have. Ours are the old fashioned type (more house manager in modern staffing terms), who manage the house, sorts out the cleaners, gardeners, manages the clothes (dry cleaning send outs, mending etc), arranges for any repairs, sorts out staff rotas, manages menus etc. This is more the norm in larger houses, it wouldn't be possible for one person to manage everything. We move between four houses and each have cleaners and gardeners and we have a chef who travels with us for part of the year.

To add, there are jealous people about though. Usual line being'you've changed'
But money changes you because when all's said and done it buys you options that others dont have

Oh wow, babylove, aren't you the big 'I am' - can't believe I'm reading your posts and you're serious!

And when you have enough of it, it buys you power.

babylove - you sound very insecure and seem to think that you have some sort of status derived form your DH's wealth/earnings. I should imagine it is this that people are picking up on. You come across as very crass and dare I say quite 'footballer's wife". No one I know who is very wealthy really uses terms like 'loaded' and 'major players' let alone talks about the value of their car.