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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Lily Allen in Calais

310 replies

parrots · 12/10/2016 19:43

Couldn't find another thread on this. The situation in Calais is awful, but AIBU to see Lily Allen's overtures as slightly virtue signalling and self-indulgent?

OP posts:
Sparklyshoes16 · 13/10/2016 08:40

I'm confused by a lot of people's reactions...from what I understand Italy and Greece are not deemed safe for refugees because some of the powers that be in these countries want visitors that bring in money to the country...they see people who can't spend money/bring in money as a drain on resources...

We all need certain things to survive shelter, warmth, sustenance, safety and kindness...If you put yourself in a refugees shoes...i.e. Having to escape from war, famine, serious violence surely if you had the chance to escape you would? I assume people are thinking anything is better than this...dying a slow painful death or perhaps hope of a better life than their current situation is what spurs people on?

I watched the BBC documentary on Syrian refugees and most people carry phones with them in a plastic food bag to stop the water then once they've arrived they phone to let someone (if they are still alive) know they've survived got to their destination safe? Majority of people have phones and most very rarely go anywhere without them even the loo sometimes so would you really travel without one? 112 is the international no for emergency services? More commonly used in Europe? You would hope if someone is saying my boat is sinking...the operator would think we need to scramble a lifeboat/coastguard...not an ambulance and with what technology can do nowadays with signals etc ...those who questioning why are they wanting to come here? Perhaps maybe question if you were in that position would u want someone to question or open their arms and tell you...you are safe now? Just that simple act of kindness and humanity makes the world go round...as far as I'm aware the UK has took in nowhere near its quota for refugees and neither has a lot of other European countries (quickly googled this) maybe just some good old human kindness is needed as I hope I am never in their situation.

Sparklyshoes16 · 13/10/2016 08:41

I'm confused by a lot of people's reactions...from what I understand Italy and Greece are not deemed safe for refugees because some of the powers that be in these countries want visitors that bring in money to the country...they see people who can't spend money/bring in money as a drain on resources...

We all need certain things to survive shelter, warmth, sustenance, safety and kindness...If you put yourself in a refugees shoes...i.e. Having to escape from war, famine, serious violence surely if you had the chance to escape you would? I assume people are thinking anything is better than this...dying a slow painful death or perhaps hope of a better life than their current situation is what spurs people on?

I watched the BBC documentary on Syrian refugees and most people carry phones with them in a plastic food bag to stop the water then once they've arrived they phone to let someone (if they are still alive) know they've survived got to their destination safe? Majority of people have phones and most very rarely go anywhere without them even the loo sometimes so would you really travel without one? 112 is the international no for emergency services? More commonly used in Europe? You would hope if someone is saying my boat is sinking...the operator would think we need to scramble a lifeboat/coastguard...not an ambulance and with what technology can do nowadays with signals etc ...those who questioning why are they wanting to come here? Perhaps maybe question if you were in that position would u want someone to question or open their arms and tell you...you are safe now? Just that simple act of kindness and humanity makes the world go round...as far as I'm aware the UK has took in nowhere near its quota for refugees and neither has a lot of other European countries (quickly googled this) maybe just some good old human kindness is needed as I hope I am never in their situation.

forkhandles4candles · 13/10/2016 08:41

Wow, seems like it might be time for an MN rebrand....MN-Frauenschaft maybe?

Verbena37 · 13/10/2016 08:47

She obviously has absolutely no knowledge of how UK British forces have helped and tried to keep peace in Afghanistan....especially for the children.

Whilst the UK, US, Australian, Canadian and French governments may have gone into Afghanistan for reasons other than what they said, the actual soldiers and officers were there doing their jobs. That was ultimately preventing the Taliban from doing more harm, specifically trying to take down the Taliban regime and help the local Afghans to rebuild and protect their towns.

I think she might be getting muddled up with what US, Russian and U.K. forces have been doing in Syria.

MilkandAssal · 13/10/2016 08:59

Verbena, try and explain that to the Afghanis who lost their schools, mosques, homes and family from "friendly fire".

To be fair, this really isn't a pro military post, and I've avoided speaking about it until now. What I can say is that the Taliban were around in the late 80s in Afghanistan and we didn't face a surge like this.

and that's when we didn't get involved.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 13/10/2016 09:05

I knew she would get a massive shit kicking, and on it continues

I think people should separate their feelings about HER, and what she says which is true

justgivemeamo · 13/10/2016 09:10

milk go and find pictures from 70's of Kabul and now in Kabul. That is not the UK that is a wicked evil form of islam.

MilkandAssal · 13/10/2016 09:11

What on Earth has Kabul got to do with it? Kabul has been mainly unscathed in comparison to say Khandahar and Samangan and a million other regions.

CockacidalManiac · 13/10/2016 09:13

Wow, seems like it might be time for an MN rebrand....MN-Frauenschaft maybe?

I call Godwin's Law

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 13/10/2016 09:15
justgivemeamo · 13/10/2016 09:19

Why don't he talk about the virues of fostering to his clergy no is easier to bleed on about what the govement should do there the biggest land owners in the uk

Ask him.

But the article was about the Schenegen zone "shunting" refugees through - country after country - to little old UK because we are seen as a soft touch.

I think he is right to call attention to this - and ask - why are these countries not doing more to help? There are enough of them after all and usually a lot larger than the UK>

justgivemeamo · 13/10/2016 09:20

milk

Because you can see - in easy and simple pictures the level of repression that Kabul is under. People are fleeing the Taliban not the UK forces there.

anon123456 · 13/10/2016 09:20

Its always hypocritical when celebrities do stuff like that.

MuseumOfCurry · 13/10/2016 09:20

Milk, I've read your posts with interest.

I have a friend who acts as guardian to escort the children from Calais to the UK and she says, as many others have, that they're looking for people with Syrian ties to foster. Can you comment on this?

I'd be interested in fostering, but no Syrian ties. My husband's family is of Middle Eastern/Muslim extraction. This sort of thing matters a lot as far as I understand it.

MilkandAssal · 13/10/2016 09:21

It isn't a fucking soft touch, all of Europe have taken a huge percentage.

You know what? If it's a soft touch to take in fucking homeless 10 year old orphans, then that's fine. I'm happy for the UK to be a soft touch.

Where is the fucking humanity in you people?

MilkandAssal · 13/10/2016 09:24

Museum, are you talking about Citizens UK?

I'm not from a British background (North African) and when we registered we made that known.

I can only think it's for cultural purposes, of course when you register to be a foster carer you can refuse any cases that come to you, and if you were only keen on taking, for example, an Afghan, then you just decline all the cases that come to you until one comes along.

When it comes to things like Ramadan, and Jummah etc it's of massive cultural importance that the children are allowed to keep to their religion, even down to Halal meat. Not every British family will stick to this religiously (no pun). I also know from experience in the camp that Afghans and Sudanese don't get on. Afghans and Syrians don't really get on; so the preference might be for that. It might be to just settle children in their most familiar background.

You can refuse to foster whoever you want, you are no compelled to take the first one, and the entire background of the child will be disclosed.

justgivemeamo · 13/10/2016 09:25

well we have taken at least over 4 thousand asylum seekers children and with record highs of 70 thousand children in the care system I would say we are doing what we can when faced with a care crisis at home? Its hardly doing nothing.
There are 70 thousand children desperately needing homes already here in the UK....Europe - main land is HUGE its right they are taking dc but we also know many eu countries dont want them and happily shunt them - to the UK>

MilkandAssal · 13/10/2016 09:25

Taken or they've come?

Owllady · 13/10/2016 09:26

They haven't got any Milk yet there will be dozens of posts trying to convince you otherwise.
I'm surprised this thread s still here but mn has changed. The level of vitriol and lack of compassion is astounding.

MilkandAssal · 13/10/2016 09:27

I regularly see a meme going around Facebook from people who make comments like this;

"What about all the poor British homeless I didn't care about last week".

If you're so hellbent on fostering children (who are already in a place with a roof over their head, access to education, meals and healthcare) then go for it.

Some people will want to foster children to remove them from a situation.
Don't assume because we want to help those escaping from war, that local food bans et al are not still important.

You foster a British child as you're so passionate about it.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 13/10/2016 09:27

I call Godwin's Law

Yep.

Bound to happen at some point.

MilkandAssal · 13/10/2016 09:28

It's like the new Netmums. Le sigh.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 13/10/2016 09:29

You foster a British child as you're so passionate about it.

Wow.

MuseumOfCurry · 13/10/2016 09:32

Yes, the state of social services is pretty bleak in the UK and sadly there are too many children who need foster care, but Britain's own internal problems do not excuse us from our humanitarian obligations.

Tony Blair's actions and the domino effect that followed is Britain's responsibility, even if he won't own up to it.

somedaymummy · 13/10/2016 09:34

The ignorance on this thread is sickening.