To ask you what I should do with my grey hair.

[midlifehope]

I'm 39 and I guess pretty prematurely grey all over. I had dyed it for years - and took the chance, whilst expecting ds 2 to grow out the dye (cos I didn't fancy chemicals whilst pregnant and breastfeeding) and have gone 'au naturale'. I'm now grey all over with a short asymmetric cut. I have brown eyes, paleish skin - though pretty tanned in summer. I have dark eyebrows. The lack of faff is a revelation. However, I have noticed lately that people treat me a little differently - either I am invisible, or people keep their distance - I'm guessing it may be my hair making me look a little severe (or it could be something else that may or may not be my appearance).

Anyway AIBU to ask you what to do about this. I don't want a block colour again, as frankly, hair dyes make me feel a little ill anyway (I'm sensitive to chemicals). Highlights with blond tones look too salt and peppery IMHO as I have really dark eyebrows (I had jet black hair as a kid).

Please help me decide what (if anything) to do to get a better reaction from people - I'm still only young!

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Don't cave in.

I am also another grey haired 'old lady' who is grey way before their time.

Chucked the dye away when I was 38, as I was having to dye the roots every three weeks - a messy task! Plus the fact I developed allergies to anything I tried to colour my hair with and still have a sensitive scalp to this day.

I don't give a toss what people think of my hair!

Bear in mind it's the cheapest anti-ageing method around - start to look old already, then you won't seem to 'age' as you get older - think of the likes of Terry Wogan and Patrick Stewart, LOL...kept their styles the same for decades and it looks like they haven't aged a day!

What's the point in trying to look like an 18 year old in your forties? You just look like a 40 year old with dyed hair...

Forgot to add - with the hair down, I rock a cool Morticia Addams... :-D

I've got a few white hairs, I don't plan to dye it but I do plan to care for it really well because I noticed the texture was changing.

I switched to a shampoo for aged/fragile hair and it's much better for it.

I am very grey at 54 and prefer it. I dyed my hair a couple of times and not being grey definitely makes (some) people treat you better - but in the end I couldn't get my hair to look natural dyed. I now love to see people I estimate to be my age (or younger) with grey hair.

If you look a before and after pictures the womans skin always look much better with the grey hair.
Might be different if you spend hundreds getting you hair dyed mind

From a hairdressers point of view I would say that grey can look absolutely fab with a good cut and nice conditioners. But its all down to how you feel in yourself about it, some love it, others it makes them feel old before their time.

If you feel the latter but dont want to go down full on colouring mode again, why not try some nice semi permanent pastel shades they really do look pretty awesome in grey and with the obvious added bonus of you nit having to bleach/pre lighten first, its great you can play about as much as you want with it. Try brands like "crazy colour" put on in streaks, blocks where u want them, underneath, what ever u like, leave on 10-15 mins wash out and they last a good 4-6 weeks (with a bit of fade each time u wash) great for funky colours.

Good luck and have fun what ever you decide to do, and don't forget grey hair is lovely, its up to u if u like it!

I have just stumbled across this thread and love the transition from negative to positive as it's progressed - I'm 41, grey around the temples and parting and determined to ditch the dye after a few false starts. I've stopped highlighting and wondering how bad it can be if I just go cold turkey? I only get semi permanent through the rest so surely that will start to fade? Any thoughts anyone?