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Original poster

Mother V baby led weaning

133 replies

Slackalice42 · 09/10/2016 19:28

PFB is now 4 months so I am starting to think about weaning (ebf). I heard about baby led weaning know nothing about it, so I ordered a book from Amazon and sat down to have a read (coincidentally while breast feeding the spawn). Much to my surprise this caused my Mother to completely go off on one! Classic quotes such as, 'You were weaned at 3 months' and , 'That baby is hungry how can you be so cruel?' WTF? Baby is on the 95 percentile, happy, chatty and sleeps 8 hours at night. Am I missing something? Any thoughts on where this is coming from? I tried explaining about the World Health Organisation and Department of Health Guidelines and her response was that this was , 'Total bullshit put out by bureaucratic fat cats'! WTF????

OP posts:
Tarla · 09/10/2016 21:47

It was in response to the post who said they had to do spoon feeding then come back to BLW or something along those lines.

It's was my post, and yes it was "just an experience" I had however my point was that you can subscribe to all the theories and methods you like but if your baby has other ideas then the theories and methods are pointless.

SpeckledyBanana · 09/10/2016 21:49

The most helpful bit of Rapley's book is the explanation of gagging and how to deal with it.

The second most helpful thing is the recipe ideas for when your kid has had enough of broccoli.

unimagmative13 · 09/10/2016 21:51

No putting broccoli in their hands that's a big no no.

You put the broccoli on the tray and they pick it up Grin

Tarla · 09/10/2016 21:53

Not to sermonise or fearmonger but I'd recommend doing a baby first aid course before starting weaning, children's centres and health visitors often run them (ours does one every few months) and they're usually only an hour or two long. Odds are you will never ever need to use it but it is well worth having that knowledge should you ever need it.

unimagmative13 · 09/10/2016 21:56

All parents should do first aid really.

RiverTam · 09/10/2016 21:57

arerhere the book includes a load of waffle that's opinion dressed up as fact that basically says that if you don't do BLW your baby will end up a total fatty unable to recognise their own appetite, chew properly or eat anything that isn't smooth and bland. Which is, of course, arrant nonsense.

She's done a recipe book as well (might as well milk it for all its worth) which surely puts paid to the idea that it's all about giving your baby what you're eating anyway.

BLW didn't work for me and I'm not a fan, but I hate and loathe that book.

arethereanyleftatall · 09/10/2016 22:01

You're right unimaginative13. Forgot that. Fuck. Should have read the book.

unimagmative13 · 09/10/2016 22:03

River, say it how it is!

missm0use · 09/10/2016 22:17

I waited till six months and did BLW - my DD loves her veg particularly cucumber and asparagus! Way I view it is to make dinner time a bit of sensory play as well.

MIL is / was livid that I waited so long to introduce DD to solids. She wanted me to buy bottles so she could give the baby a bottle - my DD is exclusively breastfeed. Still is at almost 9 months!

She she's anything I do differently to how she did things as a slight on her parenting choices. I say the same thing every time she starts to get worked up about things "you made your parenting decisions based on the advice given to you by your midwife / HV - I'm doing the same"!! Soon shuts her up! GrinGrin

FasterThanASnakeAndAMongoose · 09/10/2016 23:13

I did blw with dc1 from just before 6 months. All fine - duck to water. I also kept a stash of pouches and jars for variety/convenience.

Dc2 is 8 months and totally different. I tried blw from just over 6 months. Anything remotely textured, never mind solid, brought on immediate projectile vomiting. I went back to spoon feeding totally smooth purees and so far so good.

StrawberryQuik · 10/10/2016 04:21

LaurieMarlow It's in testing what you say about European countries. Italy has just switched the opposite way from 4-6m and being strict about the order in which foods are introduced to 6m and no longer a strict order in which to wean.

I think (although I don't read Italian regularly so I might have missed some nuance in the article I just read) that there is also a positive view towards BLW as long as you don't eat a lot of processed foods.

Senpai · 10/10/2016 04:43

I was told to keep mine on formula until 6 months. But, babies will do things on their own time whether you like it or not. Wink

finova · 10/10/2016 07:29

Latest advice for early weaning in my area has just changed from 17 weeks to 20 weeks.

capercaillie · 10/10/2016 07:42

2 children - 1 BLW and is now an incredibly fussy eater 10 years on. 2nd child weaned with mix of puree/ mash and finger food and not fussy at all.

APocketfulOfStars · 10/10/2016 08:55

BLW weaning isn't just finger food. It's giving them any food, but as 'proper' food, not pureed. My 6month DS had fajitas with us yesterday. Strips of chicken, red pepper and yellow pepper. I loaded guacamole on to some rice/oat cakes and sucked on the lot of it. He really enjoyed himself and was watching me and then picking up the same foods.
He's having Spag Bol with us for lunch...definitely not what I'd call finger food!
The Gill Rapley book is great, and also I recommend you look up this site...
www.babyledweaning.com
Good luck for when you do start!

corythatwas · 10/10/2016 09:00

Nanny0gg Sun 09-Oct-16 20:12:47

"BLW is just finger foods, it's not the be all end all of weaning. My DC were given a mix of mush and finger foods. Sometimes they were spoon-fed, sometimes they fed themselves. Sometimes the mush was homemade, sometimes it was from a pouch/jar."

This. It is perfectly possible to let your baby play with a carrot without converting to some kind of cult that never allows you to feed them from a pouch when you're on a busy train and don't want to see same carrot used to plug a fellow passenger in the eye.

When my dc were little, we had lives. We travelled, we went to formal dinners, we visited sick relatives- as well as spending days at home with all the time in the world to allow baby to explore. One approach wouldn't have done for all those occasions.

And besides, most of the time dc had the same food as us. Which included mash, soup and other puree-type foods. I would end up in tears if I had to eat soup with a spoon, and so no doubt would a baby.

corythatwas · 10/10/2016 09:01

typo: "if I had to eat soup with my fingers"- obviously

QforCucumber · 10/10/2016 09:14

Ds is 6.5 months. Mil also horrified, firstly that I bf at all as she ff and doesn't see why anyone wold want to bf Hmm secondly we waited until ds was approx 5.5 months to begin weaning.
Anything sloppy (porridge for example) is spoon fed, but he will also happily blw with toast, scrambled egg, veg and other things. I've found this mixture works best for us.

whattheseithakasmean · 10/10/2016 09:31

Reading this thread is a nostalgic reminder of how large these things loom in your life when your children are small. I have teenagers now, so I can confidently report that how you introduce food makes bog all difference to your child as an adult, but the baby years have the potential to be dull so if you like making an issue out of basic stuff then I guess it provides a bit of interest to the daily grind of meal prep.

On a general note - grandparents should learn to bite their tongue but I do empathise that it must be hard for them faced with an over enthusiastic new mum who thinks she has discovered the best thing ever. When it comes to babies, there really is nothing new under the sun.

unimagmative13 · 10/10/2016 10:15

Just not to confuse the OP you can't 'BLW with toast or finger food and spoon feed sloppy on a spoon' - BLW has pre loaded spoons in which a child feed themselves with spoons.

BLW is no parent led spoon feeding. There is no bit of both because your child can hold a bit of food while you feed them.

Traditional weaning is spoon feeding plus finger food - so if you are 'doing a bit of both' you are traditional weaning.

unimagmative13 · 10/10/2016 10:17

Also the lastest advice hasn't changed in one area of the country to 17 weeks Hmm

More likely YOUR Health visitor is promoting early weaning and should be reported.

StrawberryQuik · 10/10/2016 10:26

She's saying early weaning in her area has gone up from 17 to 20 weeks. Plus she might not be in England.

Butterpuff · 10/10/2016 10:43

Whatever its called giving baby chunks of cooked carrots to gnaw on is so much easier that pureeing, and spooning in. My parents love it. MIL less so. But I think its because M&D enjoy watching the chaos and MIL enjoys playing baby and spooning the food in herself.

DD doesn't care what she gets or how she gets it as long as she is fed! (fingers crossed that lasts and we don't get to fussy phase too soon)

corythatwas · 10/10/2016 10:47

Butterpuff, serious question: why is it easier than feeding the baby some of the mash that is already on your own plate? Or quickly mashing half of your own boiled carrot with your fork?

ZZZZ1111 · 10/10/2016 10:53

Thanks for clarifying unimag.

I'm also doing blw and it does annoy me when people say they're doing 'a bit of both' and that blw is just about finger foods!

BLW is about a general belief rather than about types of foods. The belief being that babies should be given opportunity to feed themselves and that this will benefit them in ways such as motor skills, trusting relationship with food etc. You don't just abandon this belief system because you are out for dinner with your gran or grabbing something quickly on the move. You don't need to. It's so easy. I can obviously choose to just give the messier foods at home when we have time to clean up, and choose less messy foods when we are out and about. No need for pouches or jars 'for ease'. I just lob a stick of cheese and a pitta in a little lunchbox and take with us. Or give him a bit of what I'm eating - was out for lunch in Cote last week and he had a strip of my steak and some bread and olives.

OP my parents also fuming that we are choosing to BLW!

BLW babies use cutlery when it seems they're ready. My baby fed himself yoghurt on pre loaded spoons on day 2 of weaning.