AIBU to think that Nursery shouldn't have done this?

[CtotheB]

We have recently started weaning my 6 month old DD with fruit purée and some BLW. At the minute it is 1-2 meals per day. She was at Nursery all day on Monday so I dropped her off with her usual milk and a jar of food I know she liked and wasn't allergic to (hasn't previously had a reaction). On Thursday she was in from 12.30-4pm so I gave her breakfast and thought she would be fine at nursery and give her tea at 5/6pm. Anyway when I picked her up her diary said she really enjoyed her yoghurt, but I hadn't given a yoghurt for her to have. Queried this and they said they have Nursery fromage frais that they'd given her. AIBU to think they shouldn't have done this, given the fact she a) hasn't had dairy (aside from milk) and b) didn't seek permission?? In hindsight after a bit of research I've decided the only fromage frais she will be having is no added refined sugar, as this is the 3rd or 4th highest ingredient in most!! She's a baby fgs I don't think she needs the sugar..

[NerrSnerr]

Yep, children are obese because of small pots of fromage frais. Of course.

[DragonMamma]

Ah fromage frais. The crack cocaine of the nursery world.

OP, you're coming across as a bit batty and pfb. Those organic fruit puree pots are as bad, if not worse, than a petit filous.

Having had a BF child who was lactose and CMPI you'd have found out long before now if there were issues in that arena.

[0SometimesIWonder]

(Sigh) .... And when they are older there will be nothing you can do to stop them going to the chippie/burger bar/kebab shop at lunch time, and the sweet shop on the way back from the chippie and to/from school.

[AntiHop]

Yanbu. My dd started nursery full time at 9 months. I asked them not to give her desserts as I wanted to avoid refined sugar for as long as possible. They respected that. After she turned one we allowed her to have the provided desserts. Sweetened yoghurt has a lot of sugar. We only have her play yoghurt with fresh fruit added for months and months to make sure she didn't get a taste for only sweetened yoghurt. At 2 years she still happily eats natural yoghurt.

[DoloresVanCartier]

You sent her in with a jar of prepared fruit and are complaining they gave her a yoghurt?
I was an older mum that worked full time and my DS NEVER had anything from a jar, I cooked everything from scratch YABU.

[elizabethdraper]

The bigger problem is the fruit puree. Really high in bad sugars and is developing her sweet taste buds too soon.
M in a different country but we are told to avoid all fruit purees

[Ausernotanumber]

Have you actually pulled your child out of nursery because of this?!

Good luck when they're 12 and scoffing sweets by the handful as soon as they are round the corner at the bus stop.

[teacherlikesapples]

I don't think you are unreasonable at all. The advice where I live is to introduce foods, especially high allergens one at a time, and in small amounts (half a teaspoon initially, then building up slowly over 3-4 days) Having had a child who had a massive reaction to one of their first foods at 6 months, I would prefer to be the one to introduce the foods. I think it would be worthwhile having a causal chat with them about how they introduce first foods with babies & how they communicate this with parents. a heads up (do they have a menu available) so you can at least see what she will be offered, would be good.

[NataliaOsipova]

I'm not sure whether I'm entitled to comment or not, as mine never went to a nursery, but they did go to preschool and I think the principle is the same. You place your child into someone else's care for a period of time. Presumably you've researched the place/the people beforehand. On that basis, then, you hand over to them as professionals - because you trust them. You can't then micromanage them. Obviously if your child is allergic to something, you expect them to take note of that and remember. But other than that? No - your child will eat/do/play what all the other children do.

On the plus side, though, when your children get a bit older and have school lunches etc it can be a very positive thing - mine have tried all sorts of different foods at which they would turn up their noses if I'd offered it!

[ayeokthen]

OP, I'm guessing you only have one child given your massive overreaction. None of my kids are obese, not even slightly overweight, because we have a relaxed attitude to food and don't freak out over every tiny little thing. The basis of their diet is good, home cooked food, with the occasional treat. FYI you are supposed to start them on veg purée as it gives them less of a sweet tooth. But don't let that get in the way of your superiority complex. Take her out of nursery if you're not happy, the staff will probably be relieved they don't need to deal with your extreme attitudes.

[deathandtaxes123]

ctotheb

You're in for a difficult ride if you're picking fights over this.

Presumably one yoghurt is not going to lead to or diagnose an intolerance and what are the odds that she'd even have a lactose intolerance.

You're making life difficult for yourself by worrying unessesarily about this.

Also, please don't come back insulting everyone when you don't get the answer you want. You asked for advice and you got it.

[Allthewaves]

If you want a very particular way to wean then nursery isn't the place

[justiceboner]

Breastmilk is rammed full of lactose- its the sugar in the bm that rpovides energy.

And its also in all mammal milks as well btw

If your child is lactose intolerant you find out pretty damn quickly ime.
Oh, and read the back of the jar, especially the nutritional information bit. It'll give you a nutritional breakdown. Carbohydrates, then 'of which sugars'.

Its still sugar, no matter where it comes from.

[Cheby]

There is NO difference between natural sugar and refined sugar. It's all just sugar!

YABU. Your DD has had dairy (unless you've been completely dairy free since birth) and there will be more sugar in fruit purée than in a fromage frais. Calm the fuck down.

[Gileswithachainsaw]

Surly with babies that young the weaning is all over the place.

Some will be eating meals at 5 months others are perhaps still nibbling on cooked carrot sticks at 8/9 months

Surely you would check before assuming babies can have whatever is in the nursery fridge?

[Emus]

Sorry OP but YABU.
I think moving forwards you need to give very specific instructions to your child minder/nursery with exactly what you are and aren't happy with in terms of food. Perhaps you need to provide all the food and snacks until you are happy she doesn't have any obvious allergies.

[HenryIX]

Sorry, but I agree with the OP. I work in a nursery, and there is no way we would give a baby that young food that had not been previously discussed with the parent. We very much follow the parents lead when weaning. This nursery showed bad practice by giving your baby something that you had not previously agreed.
However, I do agree that one yogurt is unlikely to hurt a baby.

[Bubspub]

Unless you've specified a reason why they shouldn't give, they will assume they can give. My nursery keep a massive stock of fromage frais as they say it's often the only thing a teething baby will accept as it's soothing and easy to swallow. They probably thought she might have been peckish and the other children were eating so it would be mean not to give her anything. I know it's difficult but she's in their care and you have to hand over some of the control and trust them. I'm sure they're very experienced and take good care of her. It's very hard to totally avoid sugar, it's in so much. I could only find the Yeo Valley yoghurts and also Aldi Mamia breakfast yoghurts which have zero refined sugar. Bear in mind that nurseries often celebrate birthdays with cake and custard, if you don't want her to have things like that then specify but would you want her not to have when all her chums are having? I think moderation is key x

[Billyray23]

Op did you explain to nursery you had given breakfast and would give tea when you got home? Did you provide milk for inbetween ? So did you state baby will need no lunch?
If not them nursery may well have thought you had forgotten to but a jar in and that's why they gave baby a yogurt.

I understand if you said baby didn't need anything and they just decided to give her a yogurt why you might feel a little peeved. But I think you are over reacting about it being a yogurt. Especially considering you he jars food yourself.

[Meadows76]

No wonder children are all obese nowadays with your attitudes to food.. Thanks OP, I wondered why my kids were fat. They all had fromage frais in nursery - I shall formalise a complaint right away

[Goingtobeawesome]

Did they think she was hungry? Given you didn't expect her to need anything before tea what were the signs? It's generally a good idea to pack extra as babies aren't rigid..

[Bubspub]

Haha if fromage frais is responsible for obesity I better get my LO on the treadmill! It's his favourite thing

[ThoraGruntwhistle]

Crikey. I had no idea that every single child was obese nowadays and that the blame could be firmly placed with Munch Bunch. Those heinous anthropomorphic fruit bastards.

[Afreshstartplease]

Poor communication from yourself to nursery RE your expectations I think op. Oh and Yabu and are clearly NUTS