AIBU to think that Nursery shouldn't have done this?

[CtotheB]

We have recently started weaning my 6 month old DD with fruit purée and some BLW. At the minute it is 1-2 meals per day. She was at Nursery all day on Monday so I dropped her off with her usual milk and a jar of food I know she liked and wasn't allergic to (hasn't previously had a reaction). On Thursday she was in from 12.30-4pm so I gave her breakfast and thought she would be fine at nursery and give her tea at 5/6pm. Anyway when I picked her up her diary said she really enjoyed her yoghurt, but I hadn't given a yoghurt for her to have. Queried this and they said they have Nursery fromage frais that they'd given her. AIBU to think they shouldn't have done this, given the fact she a) hasn't had dairy (aside from milk) and b) didn't seek permission?? In hindsight after a bit of research I've decided the only fromage frais she will be having is no added refined sugar, as this is the 3rd or 4th highest ingredient in most!! She's a baby fgs I don't think she needs the sugar..

[Tanith]

They don't breastfeed. They change to soya formula milk - at least, the two I've had did that.

You really do know if you've got a lactose intolerant child - the nappies are utterly vile!

Perhaps you're confusing intolerance and allergy, though? An allergy to cows milk would not show up if you were avoiding cows milk yourself, but would show up dramatically when cows milk is introduced into the diet.

[m0therofdragons]

I was very strict re dd1s diet. Dd 2&3 I've been much more chilled. Guess who eats the most variety? Yep 2&3.

[ayeokthen]

You come across as extremely condescending, smug and frankly not very pleasant. The key to PFB is the word precious as in you are being very precious. It was one yoghurt, tell them you're not happy and they won't do it again. Judging everyone else who is far more experienced at parenting than you because we disagreed with your incredibly highly strung attitude was snotty and rude. As a pp said, if you want to micro manage every aspect of your child's day, be a SAHM. If you can't, you need to learn to loosen up a bit. Do me a favour and screenshot this post, leave it a few years and then read it back. You'll see how ridiculous it all sounds.

[m0therofdragons]

Oh yes I love dd2&3 as much as dd1, I'm just less stressed and have removed my head from my arse.

[ayeokthen]

m0therofdragons yup, me too! Incidentally DD and DS2 are far less fussy eaters than DS1.

[TheDisillusionedAnarchist]

No you can't breastfeed a child with galactosemia. It is one of the rare contraindications to breastfeeding.

Breastmilk is much higher in lactose than cows milk and secondary lactose intolerance tends to develop around the age of natural weaning, mid childhood.

[LetsJunglyJumpToIt]

Yes none of us care about our consecutive children. My 1 year old had a fruit shoot and a Greggs pasty for breakfast.

[Prawnofthepatriarchy]

I knew a mum like you many years ago. Hers were the kids who stockpiled sweets because they were forbidden, who - even as teenagers - as soon as her back was turned grabbed any contraband possible and made meals out a nightmare because they were so fussy. Her attitude to food coloured their development. She, like you, made it clear she thought herself superior. Who's laughing now?

Ok, your baby is very young, but you're setting yourself up for a lifetime of food issues. You can eat well without micromanaging every damn thing. Just cook most meals from scratch and keep a sense of proportion.

[arethereanyleftatall]

Re not caring about consecutive children.

Of course you do, I assume you're just trying to be facetious.

You're just better at parenting by then, and understand what matters and what really doesn't.

It's sensible to listen to those who have more experience than you, not dismissive.

[Tanith]

I've cared for a lactose-intolerant baby and one allergic to cows milk who was given formula.

The lactose-intolerant one was fretful and unsettled, failing to thrive with a rumbling, bloated gut and produced foul overflowing nappies.

The cows milk allergy child was miserable after the first bottle and rushed to hospital after the second with violent and prolonged sickness. They thought at first it was food poisoning.
Thank God, not in my care at the time!

Both happy as Larry once switched to soya milk.

You really would know if your child was either, Op.

[MrsRyanGosling15]

I think you are getting confused here. Lactose intolerance in babies is very rare and babies become seriously ill very quickly, including from the lactose in breast milk. Reacting to diary products is related to cows milk protein allergy. I would be 100% confident that your child has no issues with diary as you have been breastfeeding her. There are sources of dairy in literally everything, it is quite difficult to cut it all out, even some breads, biscuts, there are so many foods you wouldn't think off. So you could pretty much guarantee she has had diary products through your milk. Adults with lactose intolerance can have dairy products, it is the sugar they are intolerant off hence lactose free products. These products are not suitable for anyone with cmpa.
If you are going to complain about something, at least make sure you know what you are talking about.

[Soubriquet]

I have a baby who was allergic to cows milk

Trust me you knew something was wrong

He screamed in agony day and night. He was constantly sick. His nappies were disgusting and my life was hell for 9 months

He then got switched to milk free formula and he changed over night

[HeyNannyNanny]

She is going to a child minder. No wonder children are all obese nowadays with your attitudes to food.

I was coming on to support you, OP as the general guidelines are that cow's dairy shouldn't be introduced so early. I'm always quite careful and meticulous with weaning, my current little one has been weaning for 6 weeks now and we've just worked our way on to meat, and we've avoided added sugar.

BUT your attitude in your replies is quite offensive so for that reason YABU.

And, tbf, there's one way to find out about an intolerance - and feeding and monitoring is it. They told you, and she had no ill effects.
Also, it is a yogurt, not a can of coke.

[balence49]

Hilarious! I'm ill and this has brightened up my day.
Fast forward to child number two... They will be having a greggs sausage roll and a fruit shoot!
Yes second children are cared for. Just by then you have come to your senses and realised that it's a baby, yes don't feed them junk all the time. A little bit is fine. You sound stressed, maybe put your feet up and get a takeaway for tea?

[imwithspud]

YABU and I think in a few years op you will look back on this post and either cringe with embarrassment or laugh at your ridiculous, pfb and smug attitude.

[imwithspud]

I'm also not sure why you're obsessed with the idea of your child being lactose intolerant, that's quite bizarre

[Gileswithachainsaw]

Can someone please answer why, when people start threads complaining that grandparents are feeding the kids stuff Thursday don't want their kids to have, the ops are told to be grateful for free childcare and if they want to dictate the food then pay a child minder or nursery. Yet when they do pay for the care they are apparently also unreasonable

[imwithspud]

I think it's more the op's attitude that is unreasonable rather than the not wanting the nursery to feed her child a certain food. She is coming across as very smug, pfb and snobby which isn't helping her case at all.

[LetsJunglyJumpToIt]

Why aren't you pureeing veg? And BLW isn't the same as finger food.

[Gileswithachainsaw]

Actions can't be excused just because of how the patent comes across though. Giving new food to a barely weaned baby without the consent of the parents is still a big no.

[Backt0Black]

She is going to a child minder. No wonder children are all obese nowadays with your attitudes to food.


*
Wow OP
*
You posted on here seeking opinion. You got it, didn't like it so are throwing insults. I have to question YOUR attitude.

[StealthPolarBear]

Giles I said something along those lines and that's actually a really good point :o

[BerylMeeps]

CtotheB

Fruit contains high levels of fructose -a type of SUGAR
Breast milk contains high levels of lactose(a bound form of glucose and galactose) which is a SUGAR
Sucrose (sugar) is a bound form of glucose and fructose(more sugar!) and we use it to further sweeten food.

You must be joking if you think fructose is any better than any other sugar. You can become fructose intolerant by eating too much fruit and veg. Same as lactose intolerance by having too much milk. Sugar intolerance causes bowel issues, so whilst it's unlikely that you BF baby will have a severe reaction to lactose as you've been giving them mammalian milk, they may get a stomach upset from eating fruit purée and not enough starchy food to balance it out.

[Tanith]

That has been said by a number of posters, you just have to dig past the outrage caused by Op's comments

[HeyNannyNanny]

Can I just add that if you're obsessed with sugar and obesity - studies have shown that starting weaning with vegetables for the first two weeks is positive as breast/formula milk is sweet.