Bloody hell I've been really unreasonable haven't I?

[Eminybob]

MIL just had a knee replacement so can't drive
Her DH (not DH's dad - second (reasonably recent) second marriage) is very very ill and has just been taken to hospital in another town around an hours drive away.
She has asked for a lift to see him, which obviously we are happy to do. I agreed last night that we would all go, including 2 year old DS.
Having thought about it, I felt that as DS wouldn't be allowed in the hospital it would mean that we would have to wait outside, so asked DH if he could take mil on his own.
He said he thinks we should all go as a family, for support (may have to make a life or death decision today regarding an operation). I said I didn't think this was fair on DS as it would mean 2 hours cooped up in car seat, plus time spent waiting.
We had a bit of an argument and he has gone on his own.
I now feel really guilty. I feel that I should have gone for support, but I stand by my arguement that it's not fair on DS. (Who is now napping)
To add some more context, we only have one car and I generally do all the driving. DH can and does drive when needed but hates it, which I feel is part of his reason for wanting me to go.
wibu?

[justaweeone]

Good on you op
X

[lizzieoak]

But of a silly question here, but I've only gone as a visitor to an English hospital twice (though spent more time than I care to remember sitting around surgeries). Are there not cafeterias in British hospitals (as a rule)? There are in Canada, unless it's a tiny country one, so I'd assumed that was part of a city hospital. But perhaps not?

[ItsJustNotRight]

YABU. Kids are a pain at times but they can't always be first priority , sometimes them and their needs neeed to be way down the pecking order even if that causes a great deal of inconvenience.

[Eminybob]

DH has conceded that it was right that I didn't go.

They were there 3 hours, there was a lot of hanging about, we couldn't have really done stuff away from the hospital as it was peeing it down.

And no decisions/conversations were had about the operation as they are waiting to see a specialist in the week.

Mil didn't come for tea as it happens as she was too tired and wanted to get home. She has a lift to the hospital for the next couple of days from elsewhere and her DH's daughter is going to be staying with her for a bit (isn't local but is sticking round for the sake of her father).

I do still feel a bit guilty, mainly because we argued so I may have come across as a bit heartless, but the agreement is that it was the right thing.

[NightWanderer]

Because (as the diversity in answers shows) there are no rights and wrongs in these situations, you just have to do what you think is best. The OP was obviously upset about what happened and came here for some support and reassurance. It can't be easy for her either, so I suspect a little compassion wouldn't go astray.