To say fuck off and get out!!

[PrincessOG16]

To DH so I can clean up properly?

He tries to help and is useless, I like doing it my own way. DD is at nursery and he's not leaving till 10am

Ugh I want my freedom back.

He's off work till late next week. Has only been off 3 days and is already getting on my nerves.

So, DH, fuck off out so I can clean this house from top to bottom the way I like doing it!!

It's ok, we had a sex instead of me kicking him out earlier.

It's been a while (2/3months - not his choice. I've been in a lot of pain and health has been not as it should be).

So that cleared up an hour and he's gone 20 mins early because he has an appointment a 10:10am and I kept winding him up for more .

Going to clean up now :).

I like doing it my own way, he gets in the way and talks to me whilst cleaning. It's like he's just watching me and it bothers me so I always top to bottom when he's not here.

We have family coming Friday morning and I won't have chance to do it before then.

Oh yes, it's like the Gingerbread house round here when DP is at home. He leaves a little trail of crumbs behind him wherever he goes. Drives me wild. JUST CLEAN THE FUCK UP WILL YOU!!!!!!

Argh!! Ehem 🙏

Arf has hit the nail on the head there.

God, Arf that is incredibly accurate. Scary.

For my own mother you'd have to add in watery eyes, but otherwise perfect.

I clean at 8am, earlier depending on my schedule for the day. Why, when do you clean?

Thank god that wasn't the soundtrack to my childhood Arf. My mother didn't have the time or the inclination to deal with the mess which is possibly why now I clean a lot.

DrinkFeck - I know. I spotted that one too. but as well.

"Tell him that he''s bloody lucky that he's got you to clean up anyway, as a single man i have to do that all myself."
Imagine!

"I'd love to have someone around to do it here, their way would be fine!" Aww how chill are you?

But if you clean at 8 a.m. on Wednesday, the house will have two days to get dirty again before visitors descend on Friday.

Not really, DH is out all of today and DD only gets home after 1pm. But we aren't going home, we are off to my aunts. Will get back just before bed time.

Tomorrow we are out all day at the Safari park (knowsley are doing a £10 a car deal till the end of September!) then family are coming Friday around 8am :)

Glad you occupied the time wisely in the end! I was going to suggest going out for coffee together, but your idea was better.

lol I can relate. Can you lock him in the cupboard under the stairs?

arf your post is spot on but add in the "you's are all just a shower of lazy bastards"...I never use that word, I hate it.

OP did you think this was Chat? If not, I would move it there given you've given out some quite identifying info and then told us all you had a morning shag. Just some advice!

Much better!

My evening when he usually gets home I'm in a lot of pain. But not much pain this morning

I was going to suggest you went and had sex with him and didn't bother with the cleaning then saw your follow up post

I seriously doubt I'm going to be outed because I'm going to the Safari tomorrow. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one!

poor man being described as 'useless'. Is his salary useless? Was his sperm useless? Are his children useless?

Those women who have to clean in a special way that only they can do are unbearable. You can smell the smouldering of a burning martyr throughout the house/.

Why would anyone mind being outed as having a morning shag? If anything, the rest of us are jealous!

PrincessOG16

1. Please read all the threads on here about useless DHs who will not lift a finger in the house or go out all the time and leave their OHs to do everything domestic even when their working hours are equal.

Then realise you have a very rare species in your DH, someone who genuinely wants to help.

2. Then read arfarfanarfs post, which I must say is also very similar to my own childhood and adolescence, take a deep breath or two and think, really think about how you want him and your family to see you.

Bottom line is, he wants to help, you could easily work out a system where he does the things he finds easy or you could gently and nicely encourage him to do the task the way you prefer.

Think some of you need a morning shag. Might not be so up tight then...

His cleaning skills are erm, unique.

As he's 'cleaning' he makes more mess than he does actually clean. I don't know how he manages it really . He gets not even half way through before stopping!.

My family know I like cleaning my own home. They have their own jobs. DD is to be cheeky, make us smile as she always does and to 'help' whilst I'm cleaning'. DH is to work and complain. I clean, uni, work, care for DD.

Even doing a load of washing goes wrong with him. He NEVER uses any powder so they come out stinky still.

I like doing it. Simple.

Oh it's only his cleaning skills that are useless. His personality, his person, his job, his sperm, HE is not useless.

The irony of calling others uptight when you've started a thread about your husband interfering with your cleaning routine...

Give him one job, but make it a time-consuming one, and ask him to do it properly. Something like cleaning the oven. Don't turn down the offer and willingness to help! That is the trap so many women fall into, and it leads to drudgery and wife work and all kinds of inequality. Chores should be shared 50/50 on a day when you both have free time, and there's no reason a bloke can't do them just as well as a woman - it's practice and the willingness to learn and be patient that matter.

YANBU

I wish to Christ my D would bugger off for a couple of hours in the morning (I have no energy by afternoon - Lupus) so I could get stuck in. He's always in the way, does eff all and stops me getting on.

I have asked him time and again to piss off out of it go for a walk or a coffee or something, but he won't without me.

I could scream. I'm someone who needs to be alone for a few hours every now and then and he JUST WON'T GO!!!! Won't even walk the frigging dogs without me. It's like having a 60+ old toddler.

If he's putting washing on without powder, tell him he's doing it wrong and ask him to do it correctly. Unless he has some serious mental impediment or a seriously awkward personality, it should be an easy adjustment.