To only buy birthday gifts for people who buy me birthday gifts?

[Bibs2014]

Or is that petty?
What do you do?

[DontMindMe1]

so put a stop to it! you don't HAVE to enable their rudeness.

Just say no and mean it. i'd rather have a massive slanging match with my siblings about something like this than let them bully me.

e.g, My older sis would make an obvious point of not visiting my home when she was in the area. All the usual excuses of 'we'll see if we have time' and 'kids are tired now'. Everyone knew she was making excuses plus they all behaved the same way.

when i decided enough was enough, i would visit them only as and when it suited me. when the inevitable refrain of 'you don't visit' (as often as they'd like, i told them straight - "you don't visit me and you have cars. i'm not spending my time and money travelling to you all the time. you take the piss. so unless you want to treat me with the same respect and consideration YOU expect from me - just shut up about it"

after saying it often enough they get it. do they still thinks it's petty for me to do this - sure. do i give a fuck - no!

[Bibs2014]

I seem to be so different to them and end up in slanging matches with them because I don't agree with them. It's exhausting and easier to give in but I seethe about it afterwards.