To think I did the right thing ?

[Icecreamontoast]

We employed someone in what I'd describe as a nanny/carer role. Initially things were going well but after a few weeks I noticed that not everything was being done properly.
Then lateness and short notice cancellations became a regular thing which was annoying. Being ill a lot, one example was I had an appointment, she turned up to do school run but suddenly felt ill so lay down on sofa and went to sleep leaving me to cancel appt and do school run myself.
Phone calls when working for me or turning up at say 1/130pm to work yet not having had lunch so eating in 'my' time when she could have eaten before and was only working 3 hours so shouldn't have needed to. Various things like this over months and months which got very frustrating as I felt I was paying for nothing and ending up doing things myself when someone was there who should have actually been helping.

Anyway, I got wind that she was ttc and then I got irritated at the thought of paying maternity pay for someone who had made my life harder not easier so waited till the next incident happened (and it was quite a big thing) and sacked her.
In passing recently I mentioned this to someone and they said I was totally U to have done this and I should be ashamed ??
If have got rid of her anyway as the situation was getting worse but the thought of paying someone maternity just made me so annoyed when she hadn't really been any help and I decided the next thing would mean she would go

I had spoken to her about each issue so it wasn't out of the blue and she had had the opportunity to actually start working properly but chose not to. I think I did the right thing but my friend thinks my motives are questionable due to the maternity pay issue

Did you follow any disciplinary procedure at all prior to sacking her?

I agree her performance sounds appalling, but what did you do to try and improve it?

My guess is the people saying it was wrong have never been an employer. You didn't fire her because she was ttc, you fired her because she was useless and the ttc bit made you take action before you found yourself in even muddier waters.

Sounds as if you are well rid of her, she was clearly unsuitable and you have been more than fair by giving her chances to sort herself out. you are not a charity, and you paid her to do a job, which she clearly couldn't be bother to do correctly. Imagine how much worse it would have got if she did get pregnant! You did the right thing for your family.

I spoke to her after every incident/late cancellation to say that next time please do this or this instead. I kept it as informal and friendly as I could but it did not improve. Then I had to start actually being a bit harsher for example if there was a long social call during hours

And never mind what your friend said, she isn't you and maybe has never had issues like this. Stop doubting yourself.

I think, then, that was your mistake: you treated her as a friend rather than as an employee there to do a job for you.

Easy to do, but it does confuse the relationship and, in the long run, make issues a lot harder to deal with.

The news that she COULD be be ttc (after all are you even sure it's the case?) made you look carefully at the long term situation, which would have included some financial investment from you, and you have decided that it wasn't a good idea.
The issue here is NOT that you have sacked her for ttc. I suspect that, if she had been a fantastic job, you woldn't even have thought about it.
The issue here is the repeated issues you've had with her.

The fact that there has been repeated incidents of things that didn't go well and that it didn't improve is the proof there.

I wouold agree though that if you take someone else on again, yoou need to have clearer booourndaries and be extremely clear about what you will accept or not. You seem to have been accepting a lot of things from her and I suspect that if you had not being as friendly, she might not have taken the mick as much as that.

You need to implement a proper disciplinary procedure and issue warnings not just wait til you find out she is TTC. You have basically admitted on here that is the reason for firing her. If she saw this she could quite easily take you through a tribunal.

The problem isn't that it's illegal to fire someone because they are TTC, because as you said, you had cause. It's that it's illegal to treat someone less favorably because they are trying to conceive. If you would have given them another chance if they hadn't been trying to conceive you should have given them another chance if they were trying to conceive.

She may have been a crappy employee, but she should be treated the same as any other crappy employee, not given fewer chances or shorter shrift just because she's considering bearing children.