to move to a flat, so I can pay for DD2's school fees?

[DarcyMaisy]

I have 2 DDs. They're almost 12 and 3.

DD1 went to a prep school - we were very comfortable (with money) I was part-time, but DH had a great, good paying job. She received a scholarship, which covered 90% of fees - we pay 10% (which isn't a lot - £3,000 a year)...

DH had a bad accident, he had to leave his job, he does get some benefits, but not much at all. I have had to go back to full-time work and we can only just about afford childcare. DD2 is at the nursery which DD1 went to, she is entitled to her 15 hours very soon, it's the same price as any other nursery. We won't be able to pay the mortgage (which is quite high!) if we sent her to the same school... We would need to move to a 2 bed flat. The girls would have to share, which isn't ideal, due to their age gaps.

I just don't want DD2 thinking I don't love her as much. I read on a different thread about resentment. I also want her to have the same opportunities.

I just don't know

Oh my goodness, when you said serious I dont think I realised just how serious. I really hope that there is improvement for him.

And that is actually really important information. How woud he cope in a small 2 bed flat with a wheelchair?

I already thought that you should stay put but now I am certain.

We would have had to have found either a ground floor or a lift, but still would have been a pain.

Thanks all though, definitely made up our minds!

If you say that you are definitely moving then I may internet stalk you, come round and give you a slap :o

I really hope things get better for him, it must be so hard for both of you

Another vote for don't, but from a personal perspective.

I was that teenager who had to share a room with her primary-age DSIS, and I still have some resentment about it! Ultimately I got over it but it meant I left home at the earliest opportunity cos (certainly at the time) I felt like there wasn't really a place for me there. I had no privacy - when I was 17 DSIS was 5 so I couldn't even go to my room to read or listen to music, and studying was a nightmare too. I had a desk in my room but couldn't really use it in the evenings as DSIS was already in bed.

Your DD2 is too young to understand the difference in her early education, and as long as she knows you are doing your best for her she will be fine about it. Much greater risk of resentment from DD1 if you make her share with a sibling who is so much younger.