To buy a bed behind his back?

[Sofres]

Just moved into a flat with DD19, DS17 and DP. The flat is 2 bed but has an upstairs that is a balcony style iyswim.

The balcony bit is actually very big so as DD stays at her boyfriends the majority of the time we was just going to section off a small section of the room with some screens for her to use when she's her and boyfriend are here. To save space we was going to have a sofa bed so it can be folded away when she isn't home.

Been looking online and I'm amazed at how expensive sofa beds are and in all honestly would much rather buy a proper bed.

The space is huge even if halved and would be used as a second lounge and the tv there would be though sky go on DDs Xbox as there isn't a tv point so most likely will only be used by DD and her boyfriend.

DP is still adament that we only get a sofa bed though.

Would I be completly unreasonable to just get a decent bed for her and sectioning off some of some of the space for her "bedroom" and not tell DP until it's too late for him to say no? Eg when he's at work and comes home to the bed all put together

1. Why did you move into a 2 bed flat when you need another room?
2. Why doesn't your DP want your DD to have a proper bed?

I'd be fuming if I was your DD and I didn't even have my own bedroom.

1.Our LL was selling our old place and we needed somewhere quick. It was all we could get for now.

2.To save space.

Me too but she seems fine about it and she's hardly ever at home.

What will happen if your DD splits with her BF?

Yes yabu, it should be a joint decision.

Have thought about that but we're probably only going to be here for 6 months so hopefully it won't happen.

Don't just buy something without DP.

How about one of those guest room single beds that store another single mattress underneath? When DDs not there you could put cushions down the long side to make it like a sofa.

ummm... I'm assuming she lives with you and not her boyfriend? Regardless of how much time she spends there. She's needs a proper bed, unless ofc you and dp are going to give up your bed and sleep on the sofa when she comes home?

I know the type of room you're talking about I think and that's 100% suitable to be used as a bed room. I know people who live in flats where that sort of room is the bedroom.

What happened to her old bed?

What about the Hemnes day bed from Ikea, it is a really good sized double but technically a sofa bed. Storage in it too.

I wouldn't cut off part of a room without DP, that would be a bit

But she does need a proper bed in her home.

Her old bed was falling apart and if we took it apart to move it then we'd never get it back together again.

Thanks night I'll have a look.

I do agree she needs a real bed, DP doesn't.

get a futon

Do not get a futon. I'd rather sleep on the sofa, a proper sofa and not a sofa bed, than sleep on a futon.

Heck they're so uncomfortable I think I'd even rather sleep on the bare floor.

I know what you mean about the price! 🙄 The cheapest I've seen a sofa bed is £300 and that wasn't even a good one. I brought my sons bed for £99 and that's much better than a sofa.

Can't you use the price to argue for getting a bed. Tell your DP it would be cheaper to get her a proper bed that will be more comfortable.

Also, does it have to be a double?

Another vote or either the Hemnes or Brimnes day beds from Ikea.

futon would minimise daughter sex noise on just that basis

agree sleeping on a futon is a nightmare but she's 17, she'll cope.....

I would measure things out, draw up plans of how the space would work. My dh can't see how a room will 'work' when I move the furniture around, so drawing a plan, to scale, really helps. But don't buy behind his back as its not fair, and you probably wouldn't like it if he did it.

I would not get a sofa bed, unless you can get one with a decent mattress which is both deep enough and wide enough. A lot of sofa bed mattresses are really narrow and you end up sleeping on the metal mechanism.
The most comfortable 'sofa bed' I have slept on was from Ikea. www.ikea.com/gb/en/catalog/products/S99089423/
Its not too uncomfortable as a sofa, and folds out to a huge bed.

But futons are fugly
And uncomfortable
And heavy to convert from one thing to another
And did I mention REALLY REALLY UGLY

Daybed would be my choice too. I have a lovely Joseph one that I actually enjoy sleeping in when we have an overflow of guests, it feels cosy

YANBU. Unless your DP is trying to do this to force her out, because sleeping on a sofa bed is was overnight guests do!

If it does have to be a sofa bed, then I agree that the beddinge from ikea is really good value and comfortable.

This the sort of room you're talking you?

The only problem would be privacy if you used that as a room but I'm sure that's something that'd be easy to sort out.

I agree with PP who suggested drawing it out for DP to see.

I'd be really annoyed with him not letting my adult DD have a real bed though.

Yes, that's exactly what I'm talking about.

I'll have a go at drawing something tomorrow then.

I hope that's not what he's doing, she's a dream to have around compared to DS I think he just doesn't want an unused bed to take up space that won't be used anyway

If that's your DD's bedroom, then yes she needs to have a proper bed. Who else is really going to use the space anyway?

In his head it will be another area for us all to spend time together or a place to avoid arguing over TV. In reality we have another TV downstairs, one in our bedroom and DS has one in his room so DD will be the only one using it. It's her tv up there and her Xbox. She even chose the gorgeous sofa that's up there. It is basically her room.

IMO it's quite easy to see how the space would be used how it is currently laid out as over half the room is empty despite there being the tv stand, sofa, chair, bookcase and coffee table.