thinking I should have been seated next to my three-year-old on this flight?

[nappyrat]

Cheap (orange) airline. Normally v good when travelling with kids - speedy boarding, say they'll sit you with kid/s etc.

Flew out recently & they said a 'technical error' had mistakenly sat me in a different row(!!) to my 3 year old. They fixed it on board (after much grumbling by several passengers about not moving from seats they've paid extra to book to sit together (fair enough!)). But fixed, fairly stress free.

Return flight today, I was sat across the aisle from DS. Their handling agent told me that this is considered 'sat together'?! Erm...really?! Anyway, handling agent refused to seat us together. Cue quite a bit of 'discussing' with them why this was not on IMO. No budging. Decided to leave it & ask the flight crew when we boarded. Who eventually sorted it - v kind older couple agreed to move seats.

Before I let loose with said orange airline's customer services, AIBU to think that sorting across the aisle from a 3 yr old is not appropriate?! DS was wailing, I had to bend across aisle to comfort, there were good chunks of time during boarding when I couldn't see DS because ppl stood in between us in aisle. Just bloody stressful quite frankly. And not what I'd expect from this - or to be bloody honest - any - airline.

Opinions please mumsnet!

If I had paid and then was being asked to move for someone who hadn't paid, I would refuse. I chose to pay the extra. OP didn't. Her choice. My choice.

Boa yes I hadn't realised how much it had changed.

YoungGirl - if you're always traveling business, then you must never be sitting next to unattended offspring, so not sure what your issue is.

We were flying with an airline that didn't give you the option to pay for pre-booked seats. It was their mistake, and they owned it.

Threads like this make me glad that I don't have to plans to fly any time soon!

I don't have a problem with flying exactly- but I'm autistic and emetophobic. Any form of public transport is stressful for me. I always pay extra to be seated next to DH and DD, and no, I won't move. And no, I won't discuss why with you. But if the parent tried the 'you'll have to hold the puke bag' comment, then that's fine, but your child will have to deal with me melting down!

I have never paid extra for seats and I fly quite a lot. With EJ you can check in a month before the flight date and your seats are allocated at that time. Check in ASAP next time. It isn't "cheap" to not pay extra for your seats, you never used to have to, it's just yet another money maker for the airlines.

'. If the parent or kid is particularly belligerent I might leave a violent film on and/or give them a load of Coca Cola 30 minutes before landing.'

That is vile. Psychopathically nasty in fact.

I've read the whole thread now. I'm actually at the aggression and anger towards the OP.

I understand you OP, when booking tickets system automatically "sits" you somewhere for free, and you pay extra only if you don't like the seats. So I would also expect to be sat next to 3yo. I travelled a lot last year with a purple cheap airline, and that's how it always worked.

I'm travelling with a big international airline in November and because I booked Multi Stop tickets with an agent I'm not able to use the seat selector online. I've had to leave it with the agent to arrange seats as I'll be pregnant and with a toddler. It's the first flight ever I'm dreading for fear of DH being 9 aisles back in the middle seat of 4 which then makes it difficult swap toddler duties.

Whichever airline I travel with I'd use the seat selector even for a fee as it's not worth the stress of getting on board and being split (Don't care about being split when no kiddies involved, DH and I don't particularly talk to eachother on a flight). The airlines won't take into consider if he's a 3 year old child or 11 year old child.

Seating human a different row is clearly not on and thy admitted it was an error. Mistakes happen.

Seating across the aisle is fair enough though. I would probably have had my child on my lap for boarding if seeing them was an issue.

God some posts are so nasty. either a lot of you are sleep deprived or just snappy, miserable people just waiting to pounce on someone for a simple mistake. OP you can't win on MN, but you do get a lot of arseholes just waiting to patronize you.

It isn't "cheap" to not pay extra for your seats, you never used to have to, it's just yet another money maker for the airlines.

You never used to be able to pre book seats. You turned up at the airport ridiculously early in order to get seated together. Comparing it to the past is pointless as the ability to book actual seats was simply not possible. Now you either pay for the extra service of pre booking seats or check in early the same as you would have done in the past.

If I am ever able to take ds on a plane then we would have to pay to sit together for safety reasons. That would be always, not just whilst he is a child. I hope those who are saying it should be free are applying that to everyone who needs to sit with a carer or partner.

That's exactly what I meant soupdragon. And I still don't think you should have to pay now but am aware that I am in a minority on this.

honkinghaddock the BA website says There's no charge for reserving your seat if you have a specific seating requirement because of your disability. In most cases you can select your seat at Manage My Booking but sometimes you may need to contact us, e.g. for some types of developmental impairments.

I agree - if other adults have to pay to sit together then so should we having small children - I have 6 year old twins and one on the spectrum wouldn't never dream of taking the risk that we would be seperated so you pay...... That's the point of booking isn't it?

There is no way they could have everyone prebooking their seats, which is what would be happening with a "free for everyone" system. It is totally unworkable.

If you want the special treatment of a pre booked seat, you pay for it. Those who don't care can travel more cheaply than those who want specific seating requirements in the same way as those who don't want to take hold luggage on budget airlines or have food onboard travel more cheaply than those who want those things.

Ooh soup dragon I wonder if ASD counts as a disability meaning we could sit together ....

That's good. I hope it would apply to learning as well as physical disability.

It does VJM.

Dowager I meant traveling ON business. Not all my clients will pay for me to fly business class, unfortunately. It depends on the length on the journey.

When not flying business class, as a single business traveler, being moved around the cabin for the convenience of families who don't think they should have to pay to sit next to their special snowflake gets a bit irksome. I was once asked to move 3 times on a single flight, each time to a progressively worse seat. Now I have a blanket policy of not moving. It's a piece of piss to book seats together and there is no excuse for not doing it.

About 30 years ago, airlines charged one price for a ticket.

This included all the things now classed as Extras. Eg seating together, meals, extra legroom, etc, etc.

And the ticket price was correspondingly higher (I recall my dad grumbling about the high costs).

Airlines wanted to change the way they marketed air travel, to encourage more people to fly (and more tickets sold). So they took the high price and broke it down into those little bits, ie basic price, meals, legroom, guaranteed seats next to each other, and so on.

All the changes encouraged a lot of people to fly, who had been put off from paying the higher prices because they didn't want all the extras.

So booking seats together is not a tax on families, you are simply paying for the items from the menu that you wish to have. And even if you have the extras, I don't think the ticket price is anywhere near the prices we were paying 30 years ago.

incidentally, I don't think we'll see a change in the CAA definition about being "seated together" anytime soon. On that expensive flight that my dad grumbled about 30 years ago, I was sat in the middle of the row in front of the other 3 members of the family; we were classed as "together". Luckily for the adults sat either side of me, I was almost 16 and capable of entertaining/sorting myself out.

If I want guarateed seeats, I'll book them.

I'm in the camp of 'paying to prebook seats' no matter if I think it's right or wrong. That said, I know it's probably not applicable to the OP but if anyone requires special assistance for themselves or a dependent - if you call the orange airline rather than book SA online, they're super helpful and will sit you with your dependent or whoever is helping you and this is free - it means you can sit where you need to and with your carer etc... SA doesn't just cover physical disability and you don't have to send anything to them so for aspergers etc it is worth giving them a call.

NB - you'll need to call the dedicated SA number on their website. (I've had a lot of leg operations and they've been wonderful whilst I've been on crutches)

Having flown as a family of 5 over the years and never remembered to pay extra we have had a variety of configurations, some bizarre, some ok. Once the seatbelt light is out we just move around. Have never considered asking people to move but then none of the children got upset. I would consider across the aisle as next to. I don't understand getting flustered if you couldn't see your ds for fleeting moments while people were boarding, just seat him on your lap until everything settles down. Maybe there should be a bigger warning to parents about what 'seating with' means and then maybe it wouldn't be such a shock if you choose not to pay extra.