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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To leave holiday early?

38 replies

Badbadtromance · 08/09/2016 15:20

Dd 14 is in a theatre group. The first performance is Sunday pm but we are on holiday. Cue epic teenage tantrum. I'm on my own with 3 kids and she is eldest. I worried its not fair on other two who are 5/6. Its not a bit performance more a trial run. I would also need to do a four hour drive from quite early allowing for stops. I really need this break. Just don't know what to do.
Tia

OP posts:
GeneralBobbit · 08/09/2016 15:21

How long is the holiday? How much are you cutting it short by.

Whatever you decide, remember it's a huge deal to a 14 year old.

humblesims · 08/09/2016 15:22

Have you only just found out? Did you say you would take her but now dont want to?

Meadows76 · 08/09/2016 15:23

More details re the holiday?

Nanny0gg · 08/09/2016 15:23

If you're away, how has she rehearsed? How has she been given a part?

Original poster
Badbadtromance · 08/09/2016 15:38

Holiday is 3 days but her group give v short notice of things. Often 24 hours

OP posts:
Mybeardeddragonjustdied2016 · 08/09/2016 15:41

Send her back by coach with someone to meet her at the other end?

icouldabeenacontender · 08/09/2016 15:42

If it's a trial run, I would continue the holiday, especially as you need the break and I wouldn't be inclined to give in to the tantrum.
Presumably you'll be around for the real performance?

Wolfiefan · 08/09/2016 15:44

Tell the group she can't be there. Does she have a major part? Can they delay the rehearsal until she returns?

LemonBreeland · 08/09/2016 15:51

For a 3 day holiday I wouldn't leave early. I would also complain to the group about late notice.

trafalgargal · 08/09/2016 15:53

Trial run or dress rehearsal?

Does she have any good friends she could stay with so she can skip the holiday or come back early by coach alone ? If it's auditions she might never forgive you or at the very least ruin the holiday so no you shouldn't cancel the holiday but at 14 she's old enough for a 2 night sleepover with a friend.

ProudAS · 08/09/2016 15:56

I'm in an am-dram group and no way could we get away with such short notice.

Don't underestimate how much it could mean to your DD though after putting in a lot of work. Could she stay with a friend or travel back on the Saturday?

GeneralBobbit · 08/09/2016 15:57

I wouldn't lose the last day of a 3 day holiday

VioletBam · 08/09/2016 15:57

It's tough luck. If they're giving such short notice it's only to be expected that kids won't always make it. Call the organiser and tell them DD is upset...but you're on holiday and will miss it. Ask for more notice in future.

redskytonight · 08/09/2016 16:12

Can you send her home by public transport and arrange for her to stay with a friend?

juneau · 08/09/2016 16:18

Yes, agree with the bus/train if she's so desperate to attend. You shouldn't cut short your 3-day holiday for this.

EweAreHere · 08/09/2016 16:19

If it were me, the drama 'performance' would be missed.

And I'd be quite clear that I wouldn't be allowing any drama over it on my three day much needed break, either.

user1471552005 · 08/09/2016 16:21

I'm confused.

How can the drama club put on a performance with "often 24" hours notice?

My DD performs, and things are arranged many months in advance. THeatre has to be booked tickets sold many many hours of rehearsal etc, yes it's a big deal, what is exactly a "trial run"? An audition? Dress rehearsal?

Original poster
Badbadtromance · 08/09/2016 16:32

OK I decided to come back early, but she now wants to attend practice on Saturday too. I can't win. I haven't had a break since last September. Not sure what I'll do now. Thanks so much for all replies

OP posts:
Lonecatwithkitten · 08/09/2016 16:35

Hmm I am the producer for a children's a dram group our show is next March we have published our entire rehearsal schedule between now and then so parents can organise themselves.

ApocalypseSlough · 08/09/2016 16:37

Don't come home early, definitely not Saturday. Enjoy your break.

OliviaBenson · 08/09/2016 16:38

Errrr, tell her no! Why does everything revolve around her?

HunterHearstHelmsley · 08/09/2016 16:38

Can she stay with a friend and you go with the younger ones?

Topseyt · 08/09/2016 16:40

My youngest is 14. The older two are 21 and 17.

I have always told mine unequivocally that holidays are expensive and precious, therefore if we are away on holiday when any of their clubs (hockey, netball, drama, athletics etc.) has something on then the holiday will take precedence and will not be altered.

They have never argued that one, although as teenagers they have argued just about everything else possible, as they do.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 08/09/2016 16:41

Well, you just say no.

You explain you booked and presumably paid for a holiday and it's a shame this group only gives 24 hours notice but she can't expect everyone to miss out on a break because of a last minute drama thing

Or you give her the option of staying with grandparents/relatives/friends whilst you and the rest of the family go on holiday

Chasingsquirrels · 08/09/2016 16:45

Is leaving her alone for the weekend an option? If so could she get herself to the practice and trial?