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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dh is being unreasonable about this holiday isn't he?

55 replies

Soubriquet · 04/09/2016 21:21

We go on holiday a week on Monday.
I've posted before about it and the tension and chaos that will be caused by family but hey ho. Off we go.

Talking to Dh about it today and he mentioned about Dd sticking to her normal bed time of 6pm latest. I said don't be silly, it's a holiday. You can be flexible. He wants to keep it like that so that when we come home, her bed time stays the same.

He is being unreasonable right?

Dd is 3 btw

OP posts:
Sirzy · 04/09/2016 21:23

Things like that depend on the child really. How does she sleep? How important is routine for her?

Fortybingowings · 04/09/2016 21:25

Are you self catering or hotel?

SeaCabbage · 04/09/2016 21:25

Well you might want to enjoy some adult only evenings while you are on holiday too.

Bearfrills · 04/09/2016 21:26

We always abandon bedtime when we're on holiday and it's never caused an issue when we get home. Small DC don't know what time it is, they only know the routines that indicate it's bedtime. So we'd be out until around 10pm then go back to our apartment and do the usual wash/teeth/PJs/story. The DC would know from this that it was bedtime and would go off to sleep as usual, then DH and I would have a little drink in peace on the patio while they slept.

When we got home and went back to normal bedtimes (staggered according to age, youngest is 2yo and eldest is 7yo) there were no issues. We've been on a holiday every year since DC1 was small and never had a problem with bedtimes on our return.

Your DH is being unreasonable.

CathFromCooberPedy · 04/09/2016 21:26

6pm is very early anyway! Both my dd have a bed time of 7ish (one is 11 months the other 5.5). We are in Spain and both have been going down around 8.30, which is 7.30 UK so OK Smile

I think your dd needs a later bedtime anyway but 6pm on holidays, how will you get to eat? !

Original poster
Soubriquet · 04/09/2016 21:26

Half board caravan

And she's pretty good actually. Obviously if she's cranky and tired, it's bed time, but a later bed time won't harm her and she's usually pretty happy

She's easy enough to get to sleep

OP posts:
Peppapogstillonaloop · 04/09/2016 21:26

I like to keep bedtime the same as it means kids aren't overtired and I still get some adult evening time..each to their own thiugh!

ivykaty44 · 04/09/2016 21:27

That's fine dh, I let you do bedtime each night at 6pm

See you later.....

Original poster
Soubriquet · 04/09/2016 21:28

We always eat around 4, 4.30 anyway

We have a 1 year old ds who is NOT flexible with his routine. So he will be going to bed his normal time. We have arranged with family to take it turns in the evening.

So one night I'll stay in the caravan, the next night my parents will, the night after that my nan will.

That way the children (my little brother and Dd) get to enjoy the children's entertainment before coming back to the caravan, and the adults get to enjoy the adult entertainment

OP posts:
Bearfrills · 04/09/2016 21:28

Our little two usually have an afternoon nap on holiday. They're 2yo and 4yo and take a turn each in the pushchair while we're strolling around. Eldest is powered by Duracel and could easily stay awake until the small hours so the later bedtime has little effect on him.

stitchglitched · 04/09/2016 21:29

Isn't there entertainment at the site? The kids shows don't usually start until after 6, sounds like you'll have a boring holiday stuck in the caravan every night. YANBU.

HarryPottersMagicWand · 04/09/2016 21:31

YANBU. 6 o clock is very early for a 3 year old anyway. Poor thing being packed off to bed at that time in a holiday! Let her enjoy it. Mine definitely knew it was a holiday at that age.

newmumwithquestions · 04/09/2016 21:31

Personally I try to avoid changing DDs bed or nap times by more than an hour as she gets overtired and cries. But if you can vary things without doing that to her then I don't see what the problem is.

stitchglitched · 04/09/2016 21:33

X post. If there is going to be an adult staying indoors with your DS each night there is no reason why your DD can't stay up later and enjoy the kids entertainment as you can always drop her back to the caravan if she gets too tired. 6pm is very early.

Xmasbaby11 · 04/09/2016 21:34

Yanbu. We don't do bedtime routine on holiday. At home we have dinner at 6 and they go to bed at 8. On holiday it is similar but could be an hour or two later. Dc are 2 and 4. I think it's good to be flexible - they adjust fine when we come home.

Original poster
Soubriquet · 04/09/2016 21:35

It works on a day to day basis. But on holiday I just think she should get a bit of leeway. Obviously if she's too tired, it's bed, but if she's her usual happy self, she should enjoy herself.

OP posts:
maroda16 · 04/09/2016 21:35

I think you're right, it's a bit unfair expecting her to go to bed that early, she's on holiday too! He might see it differently when you're there and have to stay in every night!

PotteringAlong · 04/09/2016 21:36

Conpletely derailing the thread but...

cath are you really from Coober Pedy?! I'm very excited if that's true Grin

JennyOnAPlate · 04/09/2016 21:38

Yes your Dh is unreasonable. Normal routine goes out the window on holiday.

6 is a very early bed time anyway...what time does she sleep until?

CathFromCooberPedy · 04/09/2016 21:41

Pottering, I'm really sorry...but no! I'm from Melbourne (and my name isn't Cath either Grin)

But I've been to Coober Pedy if that helps?

Original poster
Soubriquet · 04/09/2016 21:42

6 is a very early bed time anyway...what time does she sleep until?

Between 7 and 7.30. Ds is the same Grin

If she wakes up earlier which is rare, she will have a flick through her picture books until we get her up

OP posts:
motherducker · 04/09/2016 21:45

Ive never even considered putting my dd to bed at 6pm Shock

Maybe I should, and then she'll miraculously sleep till 7.30am.

Original poster
Soubriquet · 04/09/2016 21:46

I know it's early but it's what works for us.

OP posts:
JennyOnAPlate · 04/09/2016 21:53

I'm very jealous! Mine never sleep past 6.30am even if they stay up til 9!

FoofFighter · 04/09/2016 21:58

Hmm 6pm isn't early at all if your child needs to go to bed at that time. My 3yo does between 6-6.30 and sleeps till 7-7.30. Stop trying to make OP feel bad and cast the DD as poor hard done by Hmm