DH and I were bought up in very different homes. My parents are very conservative, not massively social (my dad more so that my mum though) and only drink lightly and live fairly modestly. On the other hand, DH’s parents are massive party animals, live life to the full, spend money and drink lots. I was very shy as a kid, and teased because I was ‘square’ until I was 14 or 15 when I decided to become the class clown, and got into music and just grew up I guess. My friends, including DH, would laugh (well, DH does) if I describe myself as shy because I cover it up and can hold my own in a social situation, almost becoming too chatty to get over how uncomfortable I can get. But I am shy and quite private and enjoy time alone, seeing home as my haven. I love to have people over for BBQs/dinner/kids for play dates etc but don’t feel comfortable with people round all the time. DH however would always have people round if he could.
His parents are over from abroad at the moment, for a total of 5 weeks but ‘only’ staying at our house for three weeks. It’s really stressing me out - they are always in the house as they have ‘done’ London. For four days aver the BH I literally did not see him without unless we were in bed and as he stayed up drinking with them, that was sleeping.
DH has been quite horrible about it –he says I am boring and that I hate having people round. He thinks that I am abnormal and that most people are like him – he would actually live with his parents if he had the chance. He makes me feel ashamed that I don’t have an open house, odd that I like my space and privacy.
I get on well with the in-laws when we visit them, but they live in an outdoorsy/beachy country and we do our own thing a lot of the time, meeting up for day trips and meals. Or my BIL and his wife and kids will be there as well – I am more comfortable in a bigger group in that situation. However, this isn’t about the in-laws, they are just the biggest example of the problem.
He’s made me feel like a horrible person.