Ironing DH's shirts

[user1472419718]

I am a single female in my 20s. My DM (in her 50s) told me today that when I am married I will need to iron my DH's shirts. I will also (according to her) be expected to do all the housework.

Firstly, I may not get married, and if I do it might not necessarily be to a man. Secondly, why should I iron his shirts? It's not like I will be wearing them!

AIBU to think that this is an old-fashioned and out of date attitude, and not the norm among couples my age? And do you iron your DH/DP's shirts, even if you don't like ironing?

DH does his ironing. And mine.
We have a cleaner but I do almost all the cooking. Whatever works for you...
But of course you don't have to do it. This trick is to never start though, IMO.

My DP irons his own shirts. He was fully house trained before we met.

My DM went away for a few weeks when I was in my teens. My useless DF asked me to iron his work shirts. I laughed in his face. Siblings and I ironed all our own stuff once in secondary school.

I will get the iron out for about 15 minutes next week to put labels in new school uniform. Thats plenty enough for this year.

I do all of DP's ironing. I'm quicker and I hate it less. I clean the bathrooms. He does pretty much all the laundry and cooking. Share all the rest. I think I have the better deal, he thinks he does.
Win win

I think your DM is old fashioned even for her generation! She would have been young in the 1980's, that was a decade when there were a lot of changes in English culture and not all for the better. Feminism was really big back then.

Your Mum's attitude isnt the norm amongst her generation, never mind yours OP. My DH does most of the food shopping, all the washing, some of the cleaning, all his own ironing and changes the bed. He cooks about once a week. We both work full time, although he works longer hours than I do. The men I know of our generation do their share. That's how it should be surely.

I was in the kitchen at work last week when a woman said to me "I've cleaned round the sink, it was a mess. Mind you, we're all females so we ought to be able to keep it clean ".

Let's just say her comment didnt go unchallenged

I don't iron shirts, end of. No discussion. Our cleaner does his shirts but on the odd occasion that she doesn't he takes them to the dry cleaners for them to do it or attempts to do it himself. Life is too short to iron shirts although I'm perfectly happy to iron anything else

I do almost all the ironing, he does other jobs - like cleaning the bathroom, car washing.
I'm a SAHM so I see all day to day stuff as my responsibility. If I didn't do it, he would without a second thought.

The only household type skill my ex came with was ironing. I never ironed his shirts and when he moved out I sent the iron on its way with him!

Of course I don't iron DH's shirts. Don't be silly

Sometimes mums give good advice.
This is not one of those times.

I don't iron DH's shirts or anything else for that matter - both of us hate ironing with a passion and I don't own either an iron or an ironing board.

We have a lovely chap who turns up at the front door between 6.30 and 7pm on a Monday and returns our ironing on a Wednesday at the same time all we do is put it away.
Costs us £40 a week on average but worth every penny.

My mum is in her 60s and would be horrified to hear your mother say that. To my knowledge she's never ironed any of my father's clothes (although he regularly irons hers and does the vast majority of housework too. Not ideal because she thinks she's the fucking queen, but still.)

Ha ha ha ha ha. No, YANBU. My beloved DH whom I adore and would do anything for would quickly become ex-DH if he 'expected' me to iron his shirts. Besides, he's better at it than I am.

I iron my clothes and all of DH clothes.
But that's because I don't mind ironing and DH does the washing up and a few chores I can't stand so it balances out.

The first time my MIL came to our house though, she brought over a lot of shirts for DH, walked straight past him with them and gave them straight to me saying "they shouldn't need ironing as they have been to the dry cleaners"

That pissed me off. She didn't know I did the ironing, just assumed it would be me. DH can iron!

Not only do I not iron his shirts, but I've never ever done his laundry.

His clothes, his business.

In fairness, I don't expect him to wash my clothes either so it's pretty fair!

I do all the ironing in our house, but am growing increasingly exasperated with how women's clothing always has weird little folds and stitching and lining that makes ironing them properly akin to neurosurgery.

If I'm ever downloaded into the Matrix I'm going to ignore the kung fu programmes and have "How to iron and fold a fitted sheet" installed in my cortex.

I am in my 50s... your mum has a very old fashioned attitude, honest!

Having said that, I do all the ironing and loo cleaning. DH has never done either.

That said, he cooks, cleans, hoovers, washes up, decorates, DIYs, sews, takes bins out, food shops, clothes shops, and every other life chore there is - oh no! He doesn't dust either, claims not to see it !!!

I am in my 50s and I don't own an iron.

Nasty things.

mrsmata- £160 a month on ironing?

I iron everything, who really separates out their own and leaves their partners/children's things. It's like washing dishes and just doing the ones you ate off and leaving the rest.

I work about five hours less than DH a week so use those hours to clean, iron and do any bits of admin. Cooking we share. Works for us as both have equal work time and leisure time.

To be fair we don't know whether the OP's mother goes out to work or what her dh might do whilst she does all the housework. However, since any woman in her early 50s was born in the sixties and would have been brought up at a time when women were burning their bras and getting on with a sexual revolution, it's likely she will have had some exposure to the concept of men sharing domestic chores with women.

My own dh decided that his shirts needed ironing professionally after observing my attempts and now takes them to the cleaners. I sometimes assist by collecting them.

I'm 50, btw.

I am 54. Until recently i did my own ironing and DH did his. I am doing all the ironing now as took early retirement a few months back and have much more time on my hands. I offered to do all the ironing. DH did not ask me to do it. He never would.

Eurgh. I HATE ironing with a passion. It is my arch nemesis as far as housework goes. However, I do iron my husband's clothes, including his shirts. He could (and would, if there was no choice) iron his own but he does such a woeful job that I simply can't let him (and this is genuinely not a case of 'do it bad so the wife does it' he's simply blessed in other housework areas and ironing bypassed him when the skills were being handed out) It's incredibly old fashioned and irrational, but I can't help but feel people would say 'oh doesn't his wife take care of him?' If I allowed him to go to work in a creased shirt. He's in a customer facing role in the financial services industry, so he does need to look sharp.

I iron DH's shirts (if needed, he doesn't wear a shirt for work). I like ironing shirts and am very good at it two ex-Army parents

We split the housework 50:50 (I would prefer to get a cleaner, he would prefer to save the £150 per month). When I wasn't working, I did 90% of the housework.

We split the cooking. I do the majority of it (I prefer cooking) but he cooks at least two nights per week. I am "in charge" of meal planning (and writing the shopping list). Before we had a dishwasher, he did the washing up.

I am older than your mum.

My husband is currently watching TV while he does the ironing. My stuff as well as his.