To think all dentists are dead inside

[shiveringhiccup]

Apologies in advance for any delightful dentist MNetters out there, I'm sure you are the exception to the rule.

Just been to the dentist. I absolutely hate going for various reasons and find it very upsetting and traumatic. Fair enough, that's my issue.

However why is it that 99% of the times I have been, they have had terrible bedside manner, barely spoken to me, shoved stuff in my mouth or on my face with no warning or explanation, and then got incredibly huffy and told me off when I have struggled? I don't make a fuss by the way, I am visibly distressed (breathing fast etc) but let them carry on, occasionally needing a couple of seconds to catch my breath. Their attitude seems to be that they think I'm just deliberately trying to get in their way. Even though it is my body and my mouth.

Today was particularly bad, she was really not nice to me and I went to the car and sobbed.

This isn't even about one dentist, its happened like this at a number of them.

I've absolutely had it after today and I want to complain. Aibu?

[Marylou2]

I love my dentist and hygienist. Two of the most wonderful professional women you could ever meet. I didn't visit the dentist for almost 20 years after traumatic childhood visits. I first saw my current dentist in desperation after DD was born as I couldn't bring myself to smile on photos with her and I'd lost all my confidence. I expected to be judged and reprimanded, but not at all. The they set to work and restored both my confidence and my teeth.

[mygrandchildrenrock]

One of my DDs is a dentist and she is wonderful, kind, gentle and explains everything (and works for the NHS).
Unfortunately the last two NHS dentists I have seen may have been competent but neither had any bedside manner at all. Both female.

[museumum]

The only Mrs dentist I could get when I moved here was awful. Really hurt when they did scaling and polishing and often said things like "do you brush your teeth?" - despite me having perfect teeth with no decay or fillings!
I joined a private one and he's great.
Tbh I think the good nhs ones are all full 🙁

[ThomasHardyPerennial]

My dentist is really nice, and so is the hygienist. They always talk you through what is happening, and discuss hand signals if you need them to stop at any time. I actually - shock horror - enjoy going now. A free mini tube of toothpaste always helps !

[iminshock]

Yabvu
I know a ton of dentists who are utterly fabulous people and really caring.

[MimsyBorogroves]

My current dentist is lovely, and amazing with both of my children, especially my youngest who hates anyone touching him. He recently smashed a front tooth requiring an emergency trip to the dentist, who managed to examine him quickly and without much trauma, comfort me and allay my fears and generally be an absolute star. He was also quite entertaining at the same time "I don't know the word for the paste I need in English, so I just point and make noise until she [the nurse] brings me the right one. She's getting better now"

[Cheby]

YABU. My dentist is awesome sauce. He has worked with me over 10 years to tackle my phobia, I now have treatment without sedation because I trust him, he is utterly brilliant with 3yo DD who thinks going to the dentist is a trip out, mostly because he gives her a boat load of stickers and let's her ride up and down in the chair.

He is never allowed to retire!

OTOH, I've never met a compassionate hygienist. I'm sure they exist, I've just never crossed paths with one, unfortunately.

[BananaInPyjama]

I love my dentist even though he is only 18 and charges 10 fortunes (typical in Aus)- how else would he afford all his exotic hols?

Despite being 18 he is also very pleasing to the eye and very humorous.

[Atenco]

My dentist is one of my best friends and is very kind-hearted. I must admit though that ever since I found her I dread going elsewhere

[AppleMagic]

One of the nicest people I know is a dentist. She spends her holidays working for dentaid and us incredibly compsssionate.

Sadly we now live in a different country and my latest dentist seems to not feel the need to tell me what she's going to do before she does it (including actually extracting a wisdom tooth). She also refused to believe I was in pain when she accidentally polished my gum not my tooth. She only stopped when it started bleeding everywhere, which was a reasonable time after I'd tried to get her to stop because it was painful.

[Housewife2010]

My previous dentist was young and fit. It was very disconcerting opening my ageing mouth to someone fanciable.

[EmpressKnowsWhereHerTowelIs]

My NHS dentist is lovely too.

[Dontneedausername]

I love my dentist (and probably have a teeny crush on him!)
I didn't go to a dentist for 5 years, I just developed a sort of fear and he has just been amazing! I've been every month for various repairs for 6 months and he only does the cleaning on the side he has numbed so I don't need to see the hygienist separately.
Not once has he reprimanded me for ignoring my problems, and always seems helpful and efficient. And he is fab with my 2 young kids :)

[callmeadoctor]

I think that you are all big babies!!!!! (light hearted!)

[froubylou]

My current dentist is lovely. Had a few horrors though. And I also believe I had a lot of work done unnecessarily as a child/teenager. I have a fuck ton of fillings. I have only ever had one replaced in 20 years apart from an abscessed tooth last year that was already filled about 25 years ago.

But by far the worst was the dentist at the hospital that removed by wisdom tooth. She refused to believe that I could feel pain when she started pulling. I told her I would withdraw consent if she didn't give me more anaesthetic. She insisted it was pulling pains in was feeling. It so fucking wasn't.