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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU? about the food at a party I went to yesterday....

104 replies

harpsichordcarrier · 31/01/2007 10:32

so I went to a party yesterday - joint birthday for a 2 and 3 year old. The children ranged in age from 1 to 4.
the food was served around a table and all the children sat down - they served sausages, potato wedges, carrots and brocolli. all the children got exactly the same on their plates.
So far so good...
then one of the mums (one of the hosts) started making a running commentary.

Oh look X isn't eating his brocolli! come on X eat your brocolli!
look Y has cleared his plate! everyone give Y a round of applause!
Z hasn't eaten her carrots! no cake for Y!
how is R doing! come on R! clear your plate and everyone will give you a big clap!
onandonandon

so anyway cards on the table I found this mad and maddeningly. DD1 was getting more and more anxious, because she doesn't eat potato wedges. so when cheerleading woman said come on R clear your plate! she kept saying mummy I don't have to ewat the potatoes with the skin on do I mummy do I? and cheerleading woman said come on everyone likes chips....
I was the only one not clapping and whooping. I felt like a freak and a weirdo.

am i being unreasonable in not wanting my dc's to be pressured into eating more than they want to eat?
why when we worry about child obesity is it a good idea to whoop when a child asks for more sausages and potatoes?
AM I BEING UNREASONABLE

OP posts:
Original poster
harpsichordcarrier · 31/01/2007 21:03

I know, she is a bit overanxious
when we went to a petting zoo once she kepy screeching "don't touch the animals!!!!! whatver you do don't touch the animals!!!!!!!!!!"
I fear she may have missed the point

OP posts:
pointydog · 31/01/2007 21:05

really, I'm getting a sore head reading about this woman

GrumpyOldHorsewoman · 31/01/2007 21:05

Neurotic beehatch.

She sounds like a proper nutter

tinkerbellie · 31/01/2007 21:11

thats ridiculous

my ds is five now and when we go to party they offer round the food and he takes loads and it's the only time he eats everything on his plate- but he's not bothered - ut i certainly wouldn't force him to eat something he didn;t want to

i personally hate people who make a big fuss about those things - there the sort of people who come up to you when your toddler is having massive tantrum and askthe toddler what all the noise is about (which makes them scream louder!!)

and I HATE POTATO WEDGES i think they are the most revolting food since asparagus

Tatties · 31/01/2007 21:29

Do you think it's a case of doing What Dr Tanya Byron Says gone wrong?

Greensleeves · 31/01/2007 21:37

Honestly HC, where do you find these people?

controlfreaky2 · 31/01/2007 21:37

is this woman a FRIEND of yours? or just a bonkers acquaintance?? i couldnt have turned a blind eye to such lunacy. madder than a v v mad thing imo.

Heathcliffscathy · 31/01/2007 21:39

I (as usual) am with marthamoo and wickedwaterwitch.

have nothing to add.

except that you are being very reasonable.

darling.

mwah.

Original poster
harpsichordcarrier · 31/01/2007 21:40

oh no she's not a friend
she's an acquaintance
she comes as a job lot with another lovely friend of mine.
I find her reasonably amusing, from a distance

OP posts:
Greensleeves · 31/01/2007 21:42

pmsl at "job lot". SOOOOOOO rude

Jbck · 31/01/2007 21:43

Am I the only one whose DD would have been complaining because there were no peas
She sounds like a total fruit loop, I'm very keen on healthy eating for children but it was a party & I think I would have made a FFS Brocolli face if it'd been put down at a party we were at. In fact, we're off to one on Friday night if there's veg on the plates I'm leaving in support of Harpi! Time & a place I say and parties aint it.

controlfreaky2 · 31/01/2007 21:43

i see. well tell your friend that you dont wish to be in a confined space with her ever again (the acquaintance) or you wont be answerable for the consequences.....
always amuses me in adult life when some women come as job lot with their hanger on!

MadamePlatypus · 31/01/2007 21:48

How odd? Is this some kind of cult party you went to? I would no more comment on what a child ate at a party than I would comment on what an adult ate. Ohh Mrs Z, aren't you having too many carbs? good going Mrs Y, you'll be reaching your 2 litre water drinking target! Onions mrs X? Mr X won't be getting lucky tonight then!!!?

Original poster
harpsichordcarrier · 31/01/2007 21:50

I did it to my friend today:
well done M! two carrots down, only three more to go!
she was murderous and she is usually such a sweet wee thing

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 01/02/2007 00:47

She sounds like a lot of big jobs, HC.

I think I would have hit her.

Well, maybe not.

But I would have sniggered.

nappyaddict · 01/02/2007 01:15

no its a bit unfair to say no cake or whatever if they don't eat something they dont like. however a friends little girl has issues with food and to get her to eat they have to do this every meal time and everyone has to join in. so in that sense its a good idea.

Elasticwoman · 01/02/2007 09:13

If the adults behave the bonkers partywoman, no wonder this little girl has issues with food. They are causing it.

CrashBangWallop · 01/02/2007 20:10

OMG - it's a party. It's meant to be fun. What's wrong with Jam sandwiches and top hats? It's not like they eat like that every day. I can't stand this military approach to food. DD1 was at a party the other day where they were given pumpkin seeds and carrot batons. She lives this sort of stuff, but parties are for nonsense, surely?

madamez · 01/02/2007 22:46

If this buckethead's own DCs have some sort of food issue and her behaviour is helping (which I find, you know, just a little bit harder to beleive than that Princess Di was murder by Lord Lucan riding Shergar) then maybe a quiet word round all the other parents attending the party in advance wouldn't have hurt. Same as, say you have a family food issue that couldn't be sorted out by someone giving you a sharp slap and telling you to get a grip. Junk food will not immediately make your DCs explode, and if you have good a faddy eater in the family you might like to teach him/her how to politely refuse and/or take a polite bite or two and leave the rest. If there's a serious anaphylacitc-type problem then it's a good idea to consult with the hosts about the problem (please don't serve anything with nuts/eggs in) or decline the invite.

moondog · 01/02/2007 22:50

I can't understand why adults hover and urge kids to eat at parties anyway.They always remind me of interpreters at UN get togathers,each between two chairs.
Feckin' leave 'em alone.If they want it they'll eat it.
If they don't so what.

Generally they are women with generous rumps,ready to suck up leftover sausage rolls and party rings.

EmmyLou · 01/02/2007 22:52

"Sorry - we don't do broccoli at parties till we've had the party rings, chocolate fingers, pink wafer biscuits, fairy cakes, BLUE smartie buns...."

Greensleeves · 01/02/2007 23:46

belly laugh at moondog - so true

hatwoman · 02/02/2007 00:09

ooo how exciting - I just clicked on this from active convos. I hadn't noticed the am i being unreasonable tpoic business...what on earth are we going to call our aibu threads now? half the fun is clikcing on them when you haven't got a clue what they're about.

and I agree with everyone - woman was barmy. and clearly compensating for some deep seated insecurity. maybe her child's brocolli eating is her only talent so she was seizing the opportunity to draw everyone's attention to it...

Stiller · 02/02/2007 00:16

Carrots and brocoli are totally unreasonable for any kind of f*cking party! Never mind the nutter who was jumping up and down about what the kids were eating. I'd be right pissed off if I was expected to est brocoli at a fecking party.

madamez · 02/02/2007 00:19

Er, me and my DS lurrrve broccoli! It's Tasty Trees Time!