To not give MIL another chance?

[spaintrotter]

Long and complicated feud with MIL. Too much to type but basically she is a horrible woman who cut her own mother and family out of her life and did the same with us when dd was born (2 years ago).

SIL recently contacted me and told me how upset MIL is and suggested I get in touch with her to try and talk things over. I didn't want to but I thought I'd be the bigger person and then at least she couldn't say I hadn't tried. I invited her round for a chat and to see dd. She refused and said no thank you, as well as being vile to me. I swore I'd never give her another chance.

I've now received a call from SIL who says that MIL is now reconsidering my offer and is taking time to think about it.

AIBU to tell her to fuck off (not in those exact words) if she calls and says she's changed her mind?

I'm not a huge fan of DPs saying 'it's up to you' when dealing with their relatives. It creates the excuse of 'it wasn't my decision' for them if somewhere down the line they are 'guilted' or confronted by a member of their family.

I think it needs to be a joint decision. The DP needs to take joint responsibility for any decision that results in NC with a member of their family, regardless of the reason.

Sounds like SIL is trying to take control of things to me - tell her no.