Terrible holiday parenting.

[LewisAndClark]

It can't be just me?

Ds1 (nearly 14) has barely left the house. He's barely left his room, actually. He's permanently plugged in to his pc. I've coaxed him out a few times to come out to lunch with us and he's been on one dog walk. Other than meals and the occasional family film we've barely seen him.

DD (12) has only slept here a handful of times, she's either been sleeping over with her friends or at Grandma's. Again, we see her for meals and not much else, although she's come on a few dog walks.

Ds2 (nearly 5) has spent the majority of his time in pyjamas watching tv. He's been out every day with me and the dog and we've been to the park a couple of times, but mainly he's been either playing in his room or watching YouTube.

I've just realised that between them they've gone through a large tub of Nesquick in a week, and god knows how many biscuits. They are all constant grazers, although tbf ds1 has a fruit fetish so we've gone through oodles of grapes and plums too.

Am I an utter failure this summer? Please tell me there are others who are as slack as me? It's not the idyllic, adventure filled holidays I imagined for them, but they just don't want to DO much.

Littlemissneela, what's the problem with that? I often stayed in bed until 3 or 4 pm in the holidays at that age. My own 13 year old DS spends the whole day in bed sometimes, which my brother used to do too.

It is a huge effort to get them off screens. We've had a whole week exactly like the OP.

I do insist they all read, and they have read a number of books already. However they will only read or 1 hour or so in a day...They've also done all their summer homework..

Luckily we've been able to facilitate other outdoors activities, however it is a huge effort and cost as they get older, especially for working parents!

I think it's ok for the teenagers to do this op, but not really a five year old

I don't really think it's great, yes have a few lazy days it is the holidays, but weeks of lazy days won't do anyone any good

No idea what teenagers are like but a 5 year old spending most of his holidays watching TV in his PJ's is sad IMO.

Mine are 8 and 6 and love the PS3 and their ipads (Youtube/Minecraft videos)...but I limit them. A lazy morning in PJ's where they stare at a screen for a couple of hours and I sit and chain-drink coffee and mn is fab now and then...not all day though at that age.

I agree with that. Until DS was about 11, I'd always try to have at least 3 or 4 outings a week, when we weren't away.

don't worry, he's also been out every day while I walk the dog, he scooters and we stop off at the park. He's spent a few afternoons at Grandma's and we've had friends over to play.

He's not some poor neglected soul.

I also think its awful for a 5 year old spend every day of his holidays attached to a screen. Same for a teenager actually.

Well, it only took, what, seven hours for the flaming to start? That's not bad going for mn these days.

OP didn't say all day, he's been out with her every day AND walked the dog and today has been watching a movie with a parent.

Oh didn't see your OP. Didn't mean to copy

Ds2 (nearly 5) has spent the majority of his time in pyjamas watching tv

You posted it, your words...what are you after? Everyone to tell you this is just fine and dandy and that all the other 5 year olds are also spending 'the majority' of their holidays doing this?

Sorry...nope. A 5 year old spending most of his time watching TV in PJ's makes me sad for them.

It's normal.yr kids sound happy and relaxed x

"all fed, none dead" that tickled me!

I try to go out at least briefly most days for my own sanity if only to local shop or pond or to my DM who lives nearby but I sprained my ankle literally the first weekend of the holidays and I'm still hobbling around so I can't get very far on my own! Currently having a very nursery-rhyme-video-and-cBeebies heavy afternoon to try and keep DD (2) quiet as DH working night shifts this week.

We have had a nightmare day out to the zoo but DD had more fun the following day "helping" with the supermarket shop and looking at the fish in the pet shop next door

Sounds like us. Our son starts reception in September and I think he is bored. I certainly am.
We'll be off and about some days but mostly we'll be at home doing nothing. Roll on September

Ahhh OP you've made me feel so much better about my holiday style.. I have 2 DS (aged 5 & 8) and haven't really done much either. Between me working, DH working and not a lot of spare cash this year, we've mainly been in the house or the garden.. And when I say in the house, ds2 hasn't even gotten dressed today.. They're happy though, just playing games, watching tv and iPad city here.. Thanks for making me feel normal!

Well, we've just had dinner. Ds1 has washed up, DD and ds2 are still on the trampoline, I'm shattered after a hard day doing not very much.

I reckon it's been a successful day.

Dc have spent today;
Watching a DVD
On their iPads
Reading
Watching some of the Olympics
In the paddling pool
Eating :)
Now both at football training

☀️🍦🍿🍫🍭🍕🍝🏅📚🛋🇬🇧

My ds is 14.

I've seen him for about two mins a day, usually when he surfaces from bed at 2pm to ask for food.

I don't think he's set foot out the house once.

His holiday, he can do what he likes.

My 13yo DS is generally really active. He has been out with his mates, and if not with his mates then he tags along with me and toddler DS. He does retire to his room at about 6pm and then plays PS4 for a good few hours.

13 yo DD is happy doing nothing. She stays up late and sleeps in late. The few occasions she has left her tip of a room, she has ended up being a nightmare (smoking/drinking/coming home late/getting into drama). She spends her days facetiming on her iphone and taking selfies. It irritates me that she never wants to do anything, but to be honest, at least she's behaving.

My youngest DS is nearly 2. On my days off, I usually take him out. I work 3 days a week so like to make the most of my days off. He is also very energetic and would be bouncing off the walls if we stayed in.

We have had two family days out with all of us. I doubt we will have any next summer !

I love that statement at the end there cookie..
It's his holiday, he can do what he likes..
Exactly! On my holidays from work sometimes I want to do sod all... Why do we have to constantly find things to do with our children, maybe they want to do sod all too

Sorry but I agree with lardlizard somedaybaby lilaclily. A few days of this at the start of the hols is all good as they are completely worn out & a few days chilling is great. But not convinced about a 5 year old on youtube all day. My son is 6 and he does go on youtube - so I'm not anti technology or anything - but after a couple of hours he is raring to go out & do something active. His behaviour isn't great if he has too long on his tablet.
We don't do that many fancy days out - today it was £2 swim at the local pool then we got paddling pool out & made a water slide out of some tarpaulin. We go on walks/bike rides/do the garden/have picnics/go to the park etc... So I don't think there's any need to be doing whole days out doing exciting stuff.
Teenagers are different they are able to make their own entertainment - so I'd happily leave them to it & take the little one out.
We do try to encourage ours to keep active - more important than reading/maths.
Both teachers so do see it as a time to reconnect with the kids & enjoy their company as don't get chance to the other 39 weeks of the year.

DS has come back from the birthday party all shattered, sweaty and dirty.
I reckon he'll want to do nothing for the rest of the week. In fact, he's already stated that tomorrow he doesn't want to go anywhere.
Fine by me.

I might pop in the hairdressers. Down the road.

We are very lucky to live somewhere near lots of beaches etc...any spare day we are hanging out on one of them. (In more ways than one if you could see me in a swimsuit ). I don't see that as entertaining them...I read, they play, we swim...pretty chilled. I notice a definite downturn if they have too much screentime, hence not having a telly. They do have tablets that they can have the odd short burst on.

That's how I spent my childhood, I really don't remember watching the telly at all, bar staying up late one night a week for X Files!

This thread has made me really happy! I have two preschoolers and the idea that one day in the distant future I'll be able to spend days WITH THEM AT HOME like this is amazing to me!!