Terrible holiday parenting.

[LewisAndClark]

It can't be just me?

Ds1 (nearly 14) has barely left the house. He's barely left his room, actually. He's permanently plugged in to his pc. I've coaxed him out a few times to come out to lunch with us and he's been on one dog walk. Other than meals and the occasional family film we've barely seen him.

DD (12) has only slept here a handful of times, she's either been sleeping over with her friends or at Grandma's. Again, we see her for meals and not much else, although she's come on a few dog walks.

Ds2 (nearly 5) has spent the majority of his time in pyjamas watching tv. He's been out every day with me and the dog and we've been to the park a couple of times, but mainly he's been either playing in his room or watching YouTube.

I've just realised that between them they've gone through a large tub of Nesquick in a week, and god knows how many biscuits. They are all constant grazers, although tbf ds1 has a fruit fetish so we've gone through oodles of grapes and plums too.

Am I an utter failure this summer? Please tell me there are others who are as slack as me? It's not the idyllic, adventure filled holidays I imagined for them, but they just don't want to DO much.

Who gives a shit Hiker? My kid's perfectly happy and so am I

You sound exhausting to be around. I don't want DS to be productive. He's on holiday

Well ds1 hasn't emerged all day again, expect to sit with ds2 while Dh took me to the shop.

Ds2 has had a friend here all day and they've been playing out in the garden, they're now on the PlayStation.

DD has been out shopping with a friend and her mum all day and isn't back yet.

So apart from the teenager they've been quite active.

I feel no guilt at all.

And why should you, LewisAndClark? You're happy; the kids are happy; what's not to like.

Hikernumberthousand you sound like a judgemental nightmare. I've never posted on mumsnet before but had to ask you to keep some of your opinions to yourself. Everyone is doing their best to entertain their children and everyone needs a bit of downtime. Personally I hate the sun but I do take my two toddlers out as well as relaxing at home. Really hope I don't live near you - wouldn't want to bump into Mrs Judgypants!

Well ds2 has vitiligo so joking apart we do have to be careful not to be out in the sun between 12-2
Factor 50 and hats are de rigeur here
It's funny...my young neice has been here this afternoon and I had forgotten how relentless it can be....they start an activity and only last 15 they want the next thing out...the constant "watch me!" Whilst they so their new trick/gymnastic move, the having to make sure you are watching them all the time...
God, I'm loving my lazy summer hols even more now 😀👍🏻☀️📚🍪☕️🍭🍕🍦🍹

This just happens to be something I feel strongly about, it doesn't wait me judgemental or exhausting. There's a difference between holidays and robot time. God, you know what, if you're all desperately happy doing what you're doing, keep at it. I can't be bothered to tell you the same thing anymore. OP, though, you are a real hypocrite. Why write a post asking 'am I an utter failure/ lazy parent?' and then backlash and refuse to take the advice of someone who disagrees with you? Sounds like you just want compliment showering

And Mimi mumsnet lives from opinions. That's what it's for.

It's not that hiker
It's just that no one agrees with you 🙄

Not another 200-something people agree with me? Well, shit that's it then. The whole world is against me

Nope.
Just this thread 😊

Sinde no one has even tried to listen, I gotta say, I don't care

I'm with you Badders123 - you sound a lot more chilled out and fun than a certain Hiker. Hiker - opinions are often interesting but frankly you sound cantankerous and a bit miserable. I like it when women support each other, not tear one another down, which is what you seem to be doing to everyone. Some people have a tough time of it and don't need you laying into them.

What a smug bore you are hiker. Are you like this in real life?

Hiker, how are you going to cope when your dc become teenagers and start staying in bed all day? My 13 year old does this regularly in the holidays. My brother started doing it at 12. I used to lie there until 3 or 4 p.m., desperate for the loo and for a drink for a good couple of hours, before actually moving. Ah, those were the days!

The teenagers sound like teenagers and indoor time is fab! But if it was me I wouldn't be comfortable with too much TV especially for 5yrs old. We watch way too much TV nowadays and I'll try to ensure I don't encourage that habit in my kids at least when they're young. But otherwise lazy holidays are fab!

Mimi...come over to mine and I'll get the choc ices out 🍦😀
Meh.
I've been a parent for a lot of years now and tbh I can't get too worked up about this stuff but I hate that parents get so judged by other parents for their perfectly valid choices.
It's just a hard enough job, you know?
Without another parent sticking the boot in.
Peace and love people X

One particular summer - sheild your eyes hiker, this will piss you off! - I used to get up about 1pm, eat something sugary, read all afternoon, take the dog a walk, eat again, probably a pot noodle 👍🏻 and then watch stuff on channel 4 that I shouldn't til past midnight. 😂
Bloody FANTASTIC holiday that was.
Im a 70s child though and benign neglect was all the rage then 😜

Also....when you read about brain chemistry in puberty the whole sitting in a darkened room and sleeping til 1pm is totally normal....

We have parented terribly here as well.

My 7 and 9 year old have been going to bed past 10.00pm most nights. That way if I don't have to work I get to lie in until 10.00am. They have been playing out a lot, but also watched loads of DVDs and been playing on their tablets.

We have eaten a lot of crap.

Teens have played a few games of football with friends and my husband but mostly been stuck in their room. They have had friends sleep over quite a bit though.

It has been wonderful.

Hiker, have you heard of the word 'lighthearted'? I thinks that's what you've missed.

Perhaps it's something to do with spending so much time out in the sun? Maybe your SoH cells have shrivelled a bit?

I'm on the fence here and agree a teeny bit with Hiker. Sorry!

I have a teenager and a primary school child. I make sure he's up and dressed and teeth brushed by 10 and i split the day up. Half of it is spent playing indoors, tv, tablets etc and the other half we go out, just for walks or trips into town or the park. Nothing exciting

I wouldn't personally want my kids never leaving the house so I feel half and half is the best option

And these threads tend to turn into competitive who is the most neglectful parent type thing as a rule

We are having a Nerf gun battle tomorrow...
Yep.
That's right.
4 pubescent boys running amok in a field with high powered foam dart guns.
How could tha possibly go wrong right?
😂

Appreciating the honesty

I think with younger children having screen time and lazy days it's individual to your situation and the child

My own 5 year old does a v occasional lazy day eg once in a blue moon because they are simply very sporty and love sporty style holiday clubs and lazy days just don't really suit and he also has a tendency to forget about using screens when he has had an active day but I don't think it's for me to judge what others do as each child is different - mine is a raving extrovert who thrives on sports and doing new stuff (unlike his mum)

What I do feel a bit guilty about is not planning play dates or days out with school friends - I find they are just v over committed and I just haven't managed to get anything planned I am imaging lots of other school parents/children meeting up and perhaps my DC missing out a bit but not worth worrying about

Competitive?
Noooo
far too tiring....
😀