AIBU to think that this is too much money for BBQ contribution?

[jomidmum]

Last week some relatives kindly asked us over for a BBQ. We asked what they would like us to take along. They said some chicken kebabs and some burgers. No problem.
BUT then they said that they only consume meat purchased from a certain local butchers shop, and could we please buy it there.
So we did. It cost £25. For 8 burgers and 4 chicken breasts.
AIBU to think that it's not OK to name an expensive shop? Our food budget is £60 a week for 4 of us.
Obviously we'll just move on but I do think it was a bit cheeky.

The hosts provided some lovely home-grown salads, various bread options, sausages and pork steaks. And scones with jam and cream. And drinks. Although we took a bottle also.
We don't consume "cheap" meat ourselves actually. I was a veggie for 13 years (started consuming meat again 3 years ago for health reasons), and we only have meat 2-3 times a week ourselves. We tend to buy local meat when we can, always British. We buy a box of fruit and veg each week which helps keep our costs down.
I think it there is a next time, I will just turn up with baking tray of home-made kebabs etc and they'll never know where it's from!
For our own BBQs we tend to have good quality sausages, home-made burgers and veggie-kebabs and chick-pea burgers which I make myself.
Thanks everyone!

Now I have heard all the fucking grabby stories

We went to a bbq yesterday and we didn't get asked to bring anything

Rule of thumb is you always ask you may get asked to bring some coleslaw of somthing that they have forgot you always bring a drink and that's fucking it fucking hell

I would of went to Lidi and wrapped the meat in paper and pretended

We've been invited to a relatives 40th next week. All guests have been asked to bring some food..and drink. 😣😣😣

MiL only eats M&S food.

Our nearest M&S is 10 miles away with no parking.

I put Tesco stuff onto plates, cover in cling film and lie about where it came from.

I think it depends on the 'Hosts' income.

In my family and the area that I live in, if people didn't bring a main contribution, a get-together couldn't take place. I certainly don't live in MN land.

It means that there's more meet ups and more people can be 'invited'.

OP, do the Hosts know your circumstances? Is the food budget self imposed? You could have taken meat for just your Family and had a quite word.

I applaud people who care where there meat comes from.

The same people who boo-hoo over a Gorilla in a zoo getting shot, don't stop to think why these types of animals are endangered, which is mainly world farming practices, mainly for meat consumption.

Was it a nice day out for £25? Surely it goes beyond the food budget, then?

YANBU
Hosts have the choice of getting everything themselves, or accepting what their guests bring. You can't dictate where other people shop.

Yes and no. I wouldn't dictate where guests had to shop.

However in effect you had a lovely meal out and entertainment, at the cost of £25 for 4. Bargain.

We are exactly the same only use a certain butcher because we know where the meat comes from and about the welfare however would never dream of asking guests to bring any. If they ask what to bring I always say themselves will do as its their company we want. If they choose to bring something it's usually relish or more likely wine lol

I have been to lots of barbecues where the host provides salads, buns, soft drinks etc but where everybody brings their own meat and booze. I think that's perfectly fine if that's what everyone in the circle expects and does. We used to do it when the kids were small and nobody had the wherewithal to buy lots of meat and booze, and we'd take it in turns to host.

This is different though - I wouldn't expect guests to bring meat to a barbecue normally, certainly not enough to provide for guests other than themselves, and definitely not where the supplier is dictated.

worra fair point.

You could have taken meat for just your Family and had a quite word.

I really wouldn't put any of my guests in the position of possibly having to have a quiet word with me about their private finances.

Much better to ask for cheaper things to avoid that possible situation.

It's definitely up to them where they chose to source their meat, but very rude to except you to pick up the tab for it. I also think it's overpriced! I'm an ex-veggie and am very particular where I get my meat from but just a few days ago went to one butchers (where the animals are hand reared to an exceptional standard on their own land): a kilo of beef mince, 4 burgers, 4 (massive) chicken breast, 2 chicken legs and a pie was a little over £20.

Make sure they thank you for your BBQ when you leave! I've never heard of guests providing the meat before!

BirdsGotta: I think the 'lets all chip in, contribute, pot Luck' model is also a good one and, as you say, enables everyone to host a gathering. But in that case, surely you say 'oh something to cook on the BBQ / salads / dessert / bread' and leave the specifics to the person bringing it. Especially because budget is an issue. You don't have an 'all contribute' party and then lay down expensive specifications.

I can see why they specified particular welfare standard meat BUT they shouldn't have expected you to pay for it if it was out of your price range.

When we go to BBQs we are usually asked to bring a pudding, side dish and/or drink. Not the meat. But I appreciate that people do things differently.

They were vu. I will only eat free range meat, but I would never invite someone for a meal and then expect them to buy the meat. If anything I might ask if they could bring a couple of French sticks and a pack of burger buns. If I were to ask guests to bring their own, I would do a 'bring what you want to put on a the bbq' with all booze, salads, bread etc provided

If I invite people round, and they ask me if they can bring anything I say no, just themselves. They usually bring booze, maybe flowers choccies if I'm lucky, which is lovely and more than I expect. If I can't afford to cater for people, then I don't invite them. I think it's a cheek spending other peoples money for them, and especially stipulating butchers etc.

Oh well, so long as they fed other people as well as themselves on 40% of their weekly food budget, Through who gives a fuck that they have to eat beans on toast for the rest of the week?

I think it's rude to ask for you to essential cater what seems like half the meat there. Acceptable to ask for breads or salads but not the main deal.

I don't ask people to bring anything if we invite them for a BBQ. Most people ask but DH and I love to cook and enjoy making stuff ourselves. I think it's really rude to tell people where to buy meat from tbh. If I'm invited to a BBQ I always take flowers, some alcohol and a dessert.

I, personally, love the "bring food and drink to share" model for any kind of party - it means you don't have to limit numbers based on cost and you get some really interesting and lovely food you would never have thought of making. Everyone has a stake in making it a great do - and people swap recipes and ideas. I would never have thought of adding both raspberries and roasted peppers with harissa paste to a green salad but it was delicious!

The OPs experience was quite different, sadly. I think that was very odd.

I always get quite annoyed when there are big joint BBQs and all the people who bring cheap, frozen tesco burgers immediately try to grab the higher quality burgers and meat that others have brought. Sorry, but no.

I've been to a 'last minute' bbq on a Sunday... Nice day and decided to do it. Hosts decided guests needed to bring meat. Try finding decent meat after 4pm on a sunny Sunday! I think I ended up taking Tesco value but it's all I could get.

Luckily I don't eat meat so I guard my Linda McCartney mozzarella burgers and my disposable bbq!!!