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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My son was almost abducted. Just trying to spread the word.

119 replies

renruTnaI · 02/08/2016 19:11

My 13 year old son was almost abducted. I mean, you think they're safe at 13, playing out with their friends, enjoying the summer's evenings, but things like this just prove to you how they're not ever safe and as parents the only thing we can do is spread the word and warn them which is exactly what I think saved my son from actually being abducted. It makes me feel physically sick about what could have happened. So I just want you to make sure that you warn your children, no matter what their age.

It was quite late in the evening but it was still quite light out and I have always tried to give him lots of independence, like being able to hang around with friends at the park etc so I have tried my best to never be overprotective. He was offered a really cool gift by an elderly man (who reminded him of his grandad he said to me) it didn't help that his phone had recently broken so I am sure the temptation was there but I think it's definitely the lessons I have taught him that have caused him to think twice and not go. It may have saved his life.

So please please please make sure you go over those simple safety tips with your children, not just when they're 5 or 10, but when they are teenagers too.

Thank you for reading

OP posts:
AntideluvianCat · 02/08/2016 20:15

Glad your son's safe, OP

SilverBat · 02/08/2016 20:16

FithColumnist it's also the parents responsibility to know if their children are 'street smart' enough to let them go out.
Which, thankfully, the OP's son was.

Ihatechoosingnames · 02/08/2016 20:17

Warning: Daily Mail link...
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3719431/Police-warn-children-woman-tries-drag-boy-eight-car-asking-wanted-puppies.html

It's in several newspapers there's been a spate of attempted abductions recently. It's important to teach children of all ages to be vigilant.

WorraLiberty · 02/08/2016 20:17

Blimey, thank goodness he's ok.

ShippingGoods123 · 02/08/2016 20:18

Is there a link to the OP's son?

LoreleiGilmoreIsMyBFF · 02/08/2016 20:21

Also, the attempted abduction in Perranporth, Cornwall has made the newspapers (yesterday posted on here and dismissed as scaremongering)

annielouise · 02/08/2016 20:23

Glad the OP's son is ok.

One thing that has stuck in my mind since my DS was about the same age was a boy of 14 I think that was raped in woods as the man asked him to help him find his dog or his dog was injured or something like that. My DS was a bit younger at the time and I told him what happened to caution him, giving more examples of how these people can try and trick you. I was upset by what happened to this young boy. I don't know if the man found. Devastating for him.

GreenMouse · 02/08/2016 20:24

How frightening OP! Glad your DS is ok. It made me think of this video Pokemon abduction

MrsWorryWart · 02/08/2016 20:27

OP, thanks for the reminder. I'm really glad your DS is ok.

These vile 'people' (I use that term loosely) need naming and shaming.

Every school holiday there seems to be posts like this.

NickiFury · 02/08/2016 20:27

I am confused about the MN general response to any mention of child abduction. I have been on here years and any attempt to discuss possible abductions or fears about it is shut down and down played as scare mongering immediately, every single time, quite often with really unpleasant ridiculing of people who express concern.

zen1 · 02/08/2016 20:28

Scary OP. Saw the story in the local paper and it was worrying that the man followed him when he declined to go with him. Also saw that there have been a couple of other attempted abductions in the area recently. Glad your son is ok.

AnotherTimeMaybe · 02/08/2016 20:28

Yes we had something similar last month in West London. School notified us that a man was begging one of the boys (around12) to go home with him, boy obviously run off. So they told us to be vigilant!!

Your ds is clever boy !

Fairylea · 02/08/2016 20:32

Very scary.

We are in south Norfolk and only a couple of weeks ago a 4 year old girl was nearly abducted from the morrisons store when she was with her mum by some man asking her to go and look at some sweeties with him. The mum realised what was happening (she was literally next to the child) and when she pulled the child back the man walked out of the store. Staff were able to stop the man and he was arrested. You can never be too careful.

SilverBat · 02/08/2016 20:33

Well the Daily Mail link was referring to 3 separate incidents of children aged 6, 8, and 3.
As always with them, there is never the full story. I would like to think that these attempted child abductions were thwarted by the parents, as no child that young should be out unsupervised.
13 is an acceptable age for most children (but not all), and thankfully OP's son is ok.

DeltaSunrise · 02/08/2016 20:36

Shipping a quick Google will give you the link for the op.

So glad your ds is ok renru and he was savvy enough to know what to do. My dc are younger but it's a reminder to keep teaching them what they need to do in such situations.

StrangeLookingParasite · 02/08/2016 20:40

Hahaha. I'm 30, and I would say "really cool" without batting an eyelid!

Yeah, I'm quite a bit older than that and still call things cool. Shoot me.

VioletRoar · 02/08/2016 20:44

This has made my blood run cold. Will be making sure my kids have a refresher on stranger danger etc.
P

Zxzx · 02/08/2016 20:53

How scary.

I read the story in the local papers. I hope your son isn't too shaken up.

It's good to make other people aware that this type of thing can happen even to 13 year olds.

I tell my DC (who are now adults) that it's important to act really quickly as soon as you suspect something like this is happening. It's better to over react than to take your time gathering your thoughts.

It's going to be hard to let him out your sights now.

I really, really hope they catch the guy.

RotatingFan · 02/08/2016 21:01

I grew up in West London and was approached twice by random men. The first time I was 11 and in school uniform. I was walking home from school and a car pulled up alongside me and the man offered me a lift. I said no and he drove on, but then circled back and asked again, much more aggressively.

The second time I was about 15 and waiting at a bus stop. This guy wouldn't leave me alone and kept asking me to go home with him for a chat/go to the pub and he would buy me a drink/go shopping and he would buy me whatever I wanted. I repeatedly said no, that I didn't know him, etc. There were about five other people waiting for the bus who did nothing and said nothing.

I always read that statistically you are more likely to be hurt/assaulted/murdered by someone you know, so I understand why 'stranger danger' is considered outdated now, but I would always go through both situations with my children so that one is not ignored. When I used to work with teenagers I used to tell them to say ' I am a child and I don't know you. You shouldn't be talking to me' really loudly and walk away, and not worry about being polite. If the person is genuine and means no harm they would understand why a child would feel vulnerable and react that way. If the person was trying to get them alone hopefully it would spook them enough to drop it.

Hope your son is ok OP. Flowers

LillyInTheMoon · 02/08/2016 21:10

Oh that's awful. So glad he's ok. Well done to you're son. That must have been very scary for him

VioletRoar · 02/08/2016 21:14

Also the newspaper has written your son's full name, age photo and street name which is quite unnerving.

Boiing · 02/08/2016 21:18

There was a spate of this in Kent last year and the year before - all attempts seemed to be targeting boys between 9-12, trying to get them into a white van. So scary.

tiredandhungryalways · 02/08/2016 21:30

Thank God your son is okay op and smart enough to not go with him. It is so so terrifying x

GirlWithTheLionHeart · 02/08/2016 21:40

Weird isn't it Nicki? I've seen it on here for years too. Odd contrary people.

My sister was abducted by the local weirdo, he started showing her porn mags and she got very scared and luckily got out of his flat. He was very old so easier to get away from I guess.

I've been approached a couple of times by men, once I was about 16 and the guy did the whispering thing in the car like and PP described up thread.

It happens. Children need to be aware of it.

AnyFucker · 02/08/2016 21:57

Nicki I quite agree

I have been a bit confused about the way people come on to threads like these and try and shut the op, and any support she gets, right down

weird

it's like if you can pooh pooh the idea, then it can never happen

of course it fucking happens doesn't it ?