To be gutted that I won't be getting tax credits for 3rd child?

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I'm just wondering what people's opinion is really.

We are trying for a 3rd child and I won't be getting any tax credits for this child as the government has changed the rules so that from next year tax credits are only paid for up to a maximum of 2 children.

I currently receive around £1k of TC for the kids and I would have received £4k for the 3rd if the government hadn't made the changes.

That would have meant an extra £250 a month. It's a lot of money for us. My DH works and I'm a SAHM. We have a £100k mortgage on a small house in a deprived area of town. We get by. We don't have much money left each month and I need to save literally for everything. I'm really really gutted. I really wanted 3 kids and this has meant that I'll be financially alot worse off now.

Of course I don't expect the government to "pay" for my children but it would have really helped, that's all. It would have eased the pressure off.

Just for the record we have never received any other benefits apart from JSA when DH was made redundant last year which was a godsend as we would have been homeless otherwise.

Do you think AiBU to feel/ think like this?

Why should I, a disabled parent of one child (because we couldn't afford more than one), who can only work part-time at minimum wage, pay for your third child when you're not earning?

Get a job, save, have the third when you can afford it. That's why the Government changed the rules. We don't need more people on this tiny island, and this is one way of cutting our coats according to our cloth.

You've made me quite cross.

This thread makes my heart sink with the lack of compassion for others.

'they know the salary when they take the job' yet im sure if they refused it due to that and stayed on job seekers that's a fucking issue too. Some people just can't win.

It's shitty because it was there and now stopping. If it was never here we wouldn't know any different. (In terms of extra)

The definition of afford is relative to lifestyle. Some say can only afford one but down want to give up the holidays abroad, others have five and camp. NEITHER IS WRONG.

This reminds me of the Scrooge bit where he's asked for charity and asks if the work houses are still in place.

People will continue to have children for a plethora of reasons. Some people will never have the potential to earn over 20k, does that they have less right to a family than you?

Don't begrudge what other get when you are comfortable yourself, you never know if they tide will turn.

Ok... So highly unlikely fraudulent ASD diagnoses/claim would happen. Didn't see ASD there.

We upset quite a few people when my family paid for a private assessment for him just to get a simple report done. Worth every penny as it has made some professionals sit up and listen.

Glad it worked. People get 'upset' by some strange things.

I would favour abolition of tax cuts. I don't get them nor child benefit and I work full time as a single parent.

Are we still talking about the OP wanting a third child or have we moved on long ago?

I would have liked a third child but I couldn't afford it, too late now, so amazingly we just had the two. I feel quite sad that the OP felt so entitled as to post this and then say "oo don't be mean I was only asking". Either delusional or goady.

Girlgone- You must be on a very good salary if you get neither then.

If you can't afford a 3rd child with out replying on the tax paying why are you having a 3rd

When we adopted our 3rd we have to do a finacinal assment to make sure we could afford 3 children with out benefits

They even rang dh Pay proll to make sure his earnings also to find out if he could work overtime if he needed we had to provide banck account stamens every thing

Has to be a total wind up !!! This makes me so mad. I am a SAHM we get zero money from the state. Zilch nada. I worked in a highly paid job for years and we saved and saved for a house a car and for our kids!!! My husband works 14-15 hours a day much of it unpaid over time. We are down to each pound each month. I would love a 3rd child never mind the government helping you with the kids you already have! I DO NOT in the slightest feel sorry for you. In fact this has enraged me. Get a job if you want another baby or forget it. Arghhh!

My Dad was one of 10 back in the 50s, there seems to have been a succession where my Gran had 2, My Mum and My Aunt had 2, and both me and Sister have 2 DCs each.

You can't blame other posters who work hard for disagreeing with an OP in these times. I'd have loved more too but I can't financially afford it so I don't. The TC cap is one of the very few tory policies I actually support.

I can't see any reason to think that ADHD would be any different Elodie.

There are subtests for concentration span and other things that would make up a profile of ADHD. I know because my DC were given a range of screening tests early on in the diagnostic process and scored very well for those things but less well in the tests that screen for aspects of ASC.

They are oblique, obscure tests that don't relate to daily life. You can't cheat these things. You certainly can't coach children to.

This fashion for everyone on turning on and sneering at each other is vile.

Moonstar did you read just the OP then type out in rage?

Asd/adhd are often a duel diagnosis; and , according to my friends who work in the area, once the adhd is dealt with the sad becomes more apparent, which is why I paired them together.

Snow girl, is that what the Paed actually said?

Asd/adhd are often a duel diagnosis

Swords or pistols?

Cuboidal

Yes Lorsaidthedean Gospel truth that is what the Paed actually said. We tried to get a second opinion but there was no one available which is why we went private. DS doesn't have a diagnosis but we did get an extensive report done privately. We see the Paed again soon so we'll be able to see how much notice they've taken of it.

..abolition of tax credits...
Yes, I work 6 or 7 days a week and earn over the child benefit etc limit. Like most women who work full time I had the number of children I could afford. One reason the Tories got in last time was because most people int he UK wanted this kind of change - that the full time workers were no longer supporting people who don't work to have more than 2 children. IT is a very popular measure indeed and in a sense is a kindness to the children of the less well off as they stay in smaller families living according to their means. It is a good policy from all sides.

(Also no despite what some say above ther eis no legal right to have as many children as you like. That is not enshrined in any law, particularly not at the state's or other full time working mothers' expense).

So you didn't pair them together because the fraud allegation had actually been made about both then Lori?

That sounds really unprofessional Snow girl.

Just, I can't say anymore without potentially outing myself. But I stand by it.

Snow girl, have you got your ehcp sorted? If you are happy with that, you may not need a formal diagnosis.

Why have 3 children? Think of the poor middle child. If you're more interested in the money, then maybe you shouldn't have one. Also holidays, cars and everyday expenses will be pushed up by an extra child.
If you can't afford, don't have!

People will continue to have children for a plethora of reasons. Some people will never have the potential to earn over 20k, does that they have less right to a family than you?

Well, if it means that tax payers have to fund people who get pregnant, when they know they can't afford it and have no intention of increasing the amount of work they do, then yes in my mind they shouldn't be having anymore children.
I'd be delighted if the money saved would be given to children with autism / Adhd, or cancer sufferers or the disabled.

Why have 3 children? Think of the poor middle child

Is that even relevant on this thread?

Don't be a twat Poisonous

Think how much more school staff we could have, nurses, drugs, lower waiting lists etc if we stopped all child related benefits and used the money elsewhere.

We don't need more people so there is no need to subsidise children. Those that want them would just have to ensure they were willing to be able to support them. Not a lot to ask really.